Shards: Book Three


Peter W. Prellwitz



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SHARDS
Book Three
Peter Prellwitz



Chapter One
Sunday, June 15th, 2679
This is Recon Five. Eyer here. Ive got a wrecked NATech hov and six bodies. 
Send a salvage team and burial detail. Out. Harris! You and Mobieki check em 
for identags. Verilli, you take your triteam out on a five-kilometer skim. You 
two rookies get down there and assist Harris.
I dimly heard skimmers rev up their micron drives and race off. A few moments 
later, there came the clanging of metal and low tone of voices as they searched 
the ruined hovercraft.
There was the soft sliding sound of boots on sand coming closer, then I heard a 
mans voice. Judging by the jumpiness in his tone, it was one of the rookies.
Check out this one, Jill! She must have taken a dozen rounds in her back alone. 
And have you ever seen so much blood?
Careful, Manuel! Remember what Sergeant Eyer said about--
About what? About dead people? Look at her! I heard him approach and kneel 
beside me.
I should have tried moving my hand closer to my holstered gun, but I was too 
sleepy to even make the attempt. Besides, I was nice and warm where I was. Warm 
on the outside, and cool on the inside. I could have spent the rest of my life 
in this lazy, hazy twilight.
But the rookie didnt know enough to let sleeping dogs lie. I felt his hands on 
my shoulder, then he rolled me onto my back. I couldnt reach my gun, but I 
could still jam the palm of my hand into his nose, shoving the bone into his 
skull.
My arm jerked and my half clenched hand shot toward his face. It felt incredibly 
heavy. I wasnt strong enough to make it more than halfway across my body before 
it flopped down onto my bloody combat jacket. I looked up at him with half open 
eyes.
The rookie jumped back and I heard his partner draw her gun.
Geez! Shes still alive! Get clear, Manuel! Ill quiet her down. I heard the 
whine of a charging pistol. I closed my eyes, and waited. If she didnt hurry 
and fire, Id fall asleep for my own execution.
What the hell are you two doing? I heard the squad leader shouting.
We gotta live one, Sergeant. She tried to attack me! Jill was just going to 
finish her off.
And just why would you want to do that? Havent you heard of the word mercy? 
Shes no danger to us. I heard her tone change as she spoke into the comlink. 
We need a medhov, top priority. Theres one survivor, in critical condition, 
bleeding heavily. She paused a moment. Acknowledged.
I heard her approach, and a quiet hand lay on my shoulder. I wanted to 
retaliate, but couldnt do more than thrash slightly.
Hey, settle down, miss. Youll be fine once the medhov gets here. I need to 
look at your wound. Dont worry. She started to fumble with my jacket then 
noticed I had no blouse on underneath. Lukens! Turn your back.
I heard the izer open, and she became very still. I heard her swear under her 
breath, then close my jacket. She rose quickly to her feet.
Romero, grab the hovs medkit and bring it here. RUN! You! Lukens! Have you had 
your medtraining yet?
Uh yes, Sergeant, he stammered. Uh, I mean about half. The next class is--
Good enough! I need you to assist me. Get over here!
But she just tried to kill me!
No she didnt, Lukens, the sergeants voice took on a clipped, patient tone. 
She tried to defend herself. Now get down here. There was a movement. I tried 
to open my eyes, but couldnt. It didnt matter. I wasnt all that interested.
There was the sound of running feet coming toward us, and I felt them working on 
me. My jacket was pulled free and water was splashed on my bloody, sandy skin.
Look at that cut! I heard Jills voice above me. She sounded like she was 
going to be sick. She must have come out second best in a knife fight and these 
guys were evacuating her when they all got hit. An icy liquid spilled onto my 
wound and I felt frigid tingles as it cold-cauterized the wound and began 
soothing the raw nerves.
Oh Lord, save me from the young, the sergeant said with an exasperated tone. I 
found the whole exchange mildly interesting, as though it was only background 
noise. Her hands moved quickly and expertly over my body as she bound the large 
slash.
Lukens, give my your shirt.
Why?
Okay, lets try again. Lukens, give me your shirt and fifty pushups.
She placed the shirt over me. While Lukens grunted nearby, she leaned over close 
to my ear. I partially opened my heavy, heavy eyelids and saw a blurry face and 
red hair. Another blurry face stood watching behind her.
Hang on, kid, she whispered quietly. I can tell youre not NATech. Not that 
it matters; wed help one of them, too. Youre a dog, just like me. My name is 
Jody Eyer. Im the sergeant for Company B, 179th Regiment. The medhovs just 
pulling up now. Well take care of you.
* * * *
The ride back to their rendezvous point was slow and smooth. I stayed awake long 
enough to see a doctor lean over me while two aids prepped me for travel. They 
moved me up to the hov with a continuous gliding motion that bespoke much 
practice. The hov swung around and began accelerating, and I passed out.
I was out for quite awhile, too. When I regained consciousness, the doctor, a 
man in his thirties or so, had already removed the field bandage and was working 
on my wound. Though we were alone, he had thoughtfully draped the removed shirt 
to protect my modesty. He was concentrating on his sounder, carefully closing 
the wound, but looked up at my movement.
Please dont move, maam, he smiled pleasantly. Its bumpy enough in this hov 
as it is. Id like to do a proper job at my facilities, but I dont think you 
can wait. Lie still and try to relax.
Where where are we going? I whispered. My throat felt cracked and raw. He 
noticed and put down his sounder long enough to get me a drink. Not a single 
drop of the cool water reached my stomach; it was all absorbed by my mouth and 
throat. Despite a second helping of water, my body was still ravaged by thirst 
due to the loss of blood.
He went back to his work, shaking his head.
Sorry, but thats not for you to know. Sergeant Eyer says youre a dog, but SOP 
dictates we dont tell you anything until were sure.
I nodded understanding and closed my eyes. It didnt really matter where we were 
going. Nothing mattered at all. Everything I had loved was gone, dead and buried 
in a scorched hole that had been my home. In that hole was my life.
Were there any survivors? I asked quietly.
Survivors? Very few. Two troop transports pulled out moments before the 
explosions. But no one from the Third made it out. Except you, if you were with 
them. His voice was neither supportive nor accusatory.
He continued working on the slash on my chest. The cut had been made by one of 
the NATech commandos I had killed in a wild frenzy. He had laid open a cut along 
my ribs from under my right arm, underneath my right breast and clear to the 
sternum. After the explosions had thrown me from the ruined hov, the wound had 
ripped open further, turning into a jagged tear.
Your wound is fairly serious. The actual knife cut is bad, but it was clean. 
The real damage came when you tore it open. He picked up the sounder and used 
it to stimulate a cool gel he had placed along the ragged edges. Im going to 
be able to close the wound, but I afraid youre going to have a scar.
He adjusted the field my left arm was lying in. A violet field bathed the elbow 
and ten centimeters on each side, providing fluids and nutrients. The most 
immediate problem is the loss of blood. If we hadnt gotten to you when we did, 
you would have bled to death within a half-hour. If I had a fully operational 
medical facility, it would take two days to get your blood supply to normal. As 
it is, it will be nearly five.
Arent we going to your base? I asked.
Yes, we are. But although its only about ten minutes of high speed phasing 
from here, youd be dead two minutes after we started. That told me how serious 
my blood loss was. We had taken back badly wounded comrades through phasing, and 
although it was brutal on them, they always survived.
Ten minutes? Then you responded to our auto call? Whenever one of our bases 
went to emergency full alert, a planet-wide distress call was sent out on a 
narrow band to all Resistance Regiments. Those that can respond within ten 
minutes do so at the discretion of the Regiment Lieutenant.
From the doctors sour look, Id guess that the 179th had chosen discretion, not 
valor. He shook his head with more than a little disgust.
No, we didnt. Lieutenant Posen felt that our response would not be in time to 
affect the outcome, so he decided to preserve unit integrity by not committing 
resources to an already lost battle scenario, as he put it.
I remained quiet and turned my head away. Inside me burned an anger I had only 
felt against NATech to this point. How dare he! You never weigh odds when going 
to the aid of a dog. As long as theres a chance, you go. I pushed down my 
anger. There was probably more to this than what I knew. I turned back to the 
doctor.
So when did your unit show up? And why?
He shook his head. Im sorry. Id better not say anything more until youve 
been cleared. Just relax for the rest of the trip.
Five days of lying here? Be realistic, Doctor. Im ready to go now. I started 
to rise, half expecting him to push me back down. He didnt move, but didnt 
have to. I lifted my head about ten centimeters, then slumped back. He smiled 
slightly.
Dont mean to come off like a ghoul, but I told you so. Youre strong enough to 
breathe and thats it. And while youre going to be on your back for five days, 
the trip is really only three days. But since well be forced to do some surface 
phasing every now and then, youll need extra time to recover.
By the way, my name is Scott Ressler.
Abigail Wyeth.
Pleased to make your acquaintance, Miss Wyeth. He gave a short bow from his 
seated position. Since its just you, me and the pilot, and hes going to be 
busy for the next three days, what shall we talk about?
* * * *
As far as we can tell from the location and severity of the wounds, Major, all 
five of them were killed by the same person in hand-to-hand. He must have been a 
big guy to take them all on.
And the girl?
No sign of her, sir. There was a patch of bloody sand nearby with a 
blood-soaked combat jacket, female issue, lying next to it. And the hov had been 
ransacked. Judging by the footprints and skimmer paths, it was a Resistance 
recon unit performing a salvage mission. Our guess is that they also took the 
wounded woman away with them, as well as the person who took out our squad. They 
did take time to bury the five commandos. We exhumed the bodies to verify 
identity. There was one woman, but she was identified as Private Mary--
Thank you, Sergeant. Please forget this conversation occurred. You will receive 
three thousand creds immediately, and one thousand each additional year you keep 
this knowledge to yourself. Payment will continue until you die. Good day. The 
terminal went blank. Both men understood the double-edged implication of the 
closing comment.
Major Deiley leaned back in his chair and contemplated the dark terminal. So 
close! He now knew that Miss DeChant was responsible for the microsat attacks. 
Rather, another of Miss DeChants personas. Although it was three days since the 
attack on the Third Regiment, no one had yet connected the two missing microsats 
with the devastating reprisal, and it was unlikely they ever would. Of course, 
they werent aware of the similarity with his own experience. And Deiley would 
make no move to inform them.
He tapped into the NATech Orbital Schematics bank on Lunar Five and marveled 
again at the forgery. Yesterday, microsat AT142 had reported a jammed thruster. 
Thrown off course, it had struck microsat UE59 while it was still transmitting 
standard heat trail information to the presently decommissioned Antarctic base. 
It was impossible to determine that the data, flight paths and reports were 
completely false. Perhaps, if Deiley pressed a little further, he might find a 
flaw in the data, but he chose not to. Anything or anyone capable of this level 
of infiltration probably had a beacon set to notify any deep investigation, and 
Deiley wasnt ready to betray his presence yet.
The only reason Deiley knew this data was false was because he had calculated 
these two microsats as being in the best position to strike the Fifteenth 
Armored. And the loss of these two so shortly after the counterattack was all 
the proof he needed. It was proof that fanned his already burning curiosity and 
stoked the flames of his ambition.
The counter-attack had completely obliterated the Fifteenth Armored and all but 
destroyed the Eleventh and Twenty-third NATech Xeno brigades. Only fifty-nine of 
a total 300 troops survived, departing less than sixty seconds before the first 
of the deadly orbital missiles had struck with impossible accuracy. The battle 
site itself was a charred crater.
Should Deiley be able to find Miss DeChant, he would be in a position to gain 
control over this incredible skill. The difficulty lay in locating Miss DeChant, 
primarily because she was no longer Miss DeChant. She was undoubtedly the 
original persona, the one who had been chosen by some unknown but influential 
person to become Miss DeChant four centuries ago. That was the persona, the 
soulner, who had this bombardment ability. How she got it, Deiley wasnt sure. 
But he had an idea.
Deiley stood up and walked across the high stone room to his bookshelves. 
Although he was in his commandants office--his own destroyed house was still 
being rebuilt--he used the same metaphor when accessing. He pulled down 
LeClaires work and began reading it again. Had the book been real, it would be 
dog-eared now from Deileys constant accessing. His reading took him, as always, 
to the section on keyed memory encapsulation. He could not put his finger on it, 
but he was certain this abandoned technology, used only once before its creator 
was destroyed, was a vital piece of the puzzle.
He absently reached for his tea, but of course there was none. Miss DeChant was 
no longer his housekeeper. She was a Resistance fighter, hidden from his 
searching, safe from his reach. That situation would not remain so indefinitely. 
She had started sharding, and if she was like most sharded Cues, she would one 
day be back in Glendale, under his authority. And his care.
* * * *
The staff corporal in NATechs Alexandria headquarters was running late with her 
report. There had been too many anomalies and not enough hard answers to the 
destruction of the Fifteenth Armored. Between that and the relocation of the 
remnants of the Eleventh and Twenty-third Brigades, she was swamped. The 
brigades were to be sent to a new retraining base located in Australia. It was 
hoped that they would be able to deal with the horrible memories of the attack 
on the Third and become usable Xeno troops again. She finished up the dictation 
to the official log and stepped out of the puterverse to catch lunch with her 
civilian boyfriend. She hoped he wouldnt pick his teeth today.
The data located itself in one of the many data pools. It rested there for a 
moment, then duplicated itself and broke away from storage, easily evading the 
security watchdogs. It came upon a worm, trained to identify infiltration and 
follow the line back to the source. The worm was unaware as the bolt of data 
penetrated it and passed through unhindered.
The data packet followed a very specific path, overriding all blocks and 
lockouts. It penetrated all barriers by locating a programmed breach the 
thickness of a two dimensional line and passing through. It sped toward the 
Quantum data river, where it struck a large energy conduit. The conduit began 
glowing a brilliant pink. The packet was stripped of its destination header and 
sent down to the rivers edge. The conduit continued building up the packets 
energy signature, then launched it directly across the river.
Traveling at right angles to the river flow, the packet disrupted data as it 
passed. A professor at Oslos university lost all his afternoons lecture notes. 
A cred account in the name of Grant Wilson tripled in size briefly, then 
disappeared. Four thousand people in Brazil were denied access for three 
minutes. The observatory in Flagstaff thought they located a large solar flare, 
but later determined it was equipment malfunction.
The packet continued its journey across the river, occasionally colliding with 
other streams and destroying them with a flash of color. It was a great distance 
across the Quantum, but the packet had more than enough energy to make it 
safely.
* * * *
Doctor Ressler had done his best to prepare me for my new home, but he failed to 
lower my expectations enough. He himself had only transferred in six months 
previously, and already had soured on the regiment. I should have taken the 
hint.
Their base was more of a cave than a facility. I knew that the Third had built 
up a reputation as one of the best regiments in the Resistance, but I hadnt 
realized the disparity between units was so great. When we pulled into the 
hanger entrance, there was only the slightest shimmer of the shield, and the 
comlink remained unbroken. Sloppy. One lucky scan and NATech would nail this 
bases position on the first pass.
The hov spilled down the ramp and eased gratefully to a stop in the middle of 
the hanger. I was still on my back and could only see out through the overhead 
portal, but I knew they broke another SOP when the hov didnt swing around for 
immediate deployment if needed. Again, not especially dangerous but still 
sloppy.
The rear port opened and a couple of husky lads came on to guide my stretcher to 
sickbay. The base looked to have roughly the same layout as ours, so I couldnt 
help but make immediate comparisons. When I determined there was no comparison, 
I felt my already low spirits sag further.
Sickbay was larger than Barretts and held eight beds. I was put onto the one 
furthest from the door and reattached to the uvive, the ultraviolet intravenous 
unit, this time by my right arm, which I preferred, being left handed. When they 
stepped clear of the bed, I noticed a slight glimmer as a ghost field dropped 
down around me Cautious people. The way I felt, a six-year-old with time on his 
hands could have sent me to my eternal reward and still gotten in his afternoon 
nap. Ah well, I sighed, I was their guest and I would follow their rules.
Doctor Ressler had followed the two men in, rolling his eyes when they couldnt 
see him, but I could. Maybe it wasnt a total write off. He seemed to have a 
clue. He waited for them to leave and was not pleased when only one did. The 
other planted himself outside the shielding at the foot of my bed.
That will be all, Cooper, Ressler said, just a hint of annoyance in his voice.
Yes, Doctor. Cooper didnt move.
Im sorry, Cooper. What part of my statement missed you? I said, you are 
dismissed.
Yes, Doctor. Cooper didnt seem upset. The Lieutenant gave orders to post a 
guard over the hostile.
Hostile! Ressler laughed. First of all, Private, Miss Wyeth here is not a 
hostile, shes a member of the Third Regiment. Second, shes my patient. Third, 
shes so weak the most hostile action she could take would be to sneer at you.
Yes, sir. Cooper was unmoved and unmoving. Still, the Lieutenant wants to be 
sure. I dont blame him. You cant be too careful, sir. NATechs everywhere.
Even in our hospital beds, it seems. Very well, Cooper. Just keep your back 
turned whenever Im examining Miss Wyeth.
Of course, sir.
Ressler looked like he wanted to say something else, but walked to the opposite 
side of the room where his terminal was. He began accessing, keeping a tight 
field. Cooper turned toward me and shot me a dirty look.
Because of you, I have to waste my time hanging around sickbay.
Nice to meet you, too, Cooper, I said. How about we make the best of it and 
try to be friends, okay? Id bow, but Im a little tied down right now.
Save your bow, lady. Im a Company A anchorman, not a babysitter. I hope you 
are a dog, cause then I can give you payback for having to pull jerk duty. He 
turned his back to me again. Wonderful, I thought. Well, at least I sort of had 
privacy. Besides, Cooper didnt strike me as the kind of friend material I 
wanted.
Fortunately, I didnt have to wait long for some proper friend material to show 
up. About twenty minutes after Cooper and I exchanged pleasantries, Sergeant 
Eyer came in, looking clean and sharp. She looked around and spotted me in the 
corner and waved. She went and spoke to Ressler for a few minutes, then walked 
over to Cooper. She studied him as though he were something smelly shed found 
on the underside of her boots.
So they finally found a duty to match your talents, huh, Cooper? Its nice to 
see even trash can be recycled.
Cooper gave her a dirty look. He seemed to be good at giving dirty looks. 
Sergeant, if you have something to say to the patient, say it and leave. He 
made the word patient sound like prisoner.
Yeah, I do want to talk to her. She jerked a thumb. Privately. Take a hike.
Sorry, Sergeant, but the Lieutenant gave very specific orders
You forget, Cooper. I was there when he gave you those orders. And I say you 
can obey them while standing outside sickbay. If you wish to object, I will 
stand guard while you double check with the Lieutenant. Now leave.
He left. He wasnt pleased, but he left. He no sooner left than she had the 
shielding turned off. She pulled up a stool and sat down next to me. She was a 
tall woman, well built, with fiery red hair and freckles. Shed have been a real 
charmer as a kid, but was now a handsome woman, with a competent air about her.
Sorry, kid. Coopers a real pain. Most of Company A is a pain. I nodded but 
said nothing. I heard you just came in, and I wanted to see if you were doing 
all right. She lowered her voice. I also wanted to tell you how sorry I am 
about the Third. They were a good regiment. One of the best.
I thought until I was checked up on, I was going to be treated like a 
prisoner.
She flushed and looked down. Yeah. Sorry about that. This place is kind of 
paranoid about infiltration. I dont know why, its not as though we do too much 
to get noticed. We dont take it to NATech like your regiment. But Lieutenant 
Posen makes the rules, so we follow him. What else can a dog do?
She was right. You followed orders and made the best of it. I didnt like 
serving under an inferior superior, but chain of command had to be maintained in 
all but the most extenuating of circumstances, and sometimes even then. At its 
worst it was lousy, but still better than anarchy.
So, Abigail, what was your position in the Third? I hesitated for a moment, 
not wanting to tell Eyer without first reporting to the Lieutenant. She 
recognized my hesitation and added, My mistake. Im here at the orders of the 
Lieutenant for your official debriefing. What you tell me goes in the log, so 
dont lie too much.
You mean the Lieutenant isnt going to do the debriefing himself? Doesnt that 
go against SOP?
Yes, it does. If it helps, hell take what I tell him and come here for a few 
minutes tomorrow so it looks as though he conducted the whole thing. She made a 
face. Id object except that I think Im better at this than him. I got the 
impression she thought she was better than him at most things. So. Official 
question number one: What was your position in the Third Regiment?
I was the anchor for triteam one in Company A.
She looked at me for a moment, then stood up and reactivated the shielding, 
setting it far enough out for both of us to easily fit in. All sound was cut 
off. She sat down again, sliding the stool even closer.
Then youre a Cue, right?
I nodded. Yes. I was reintegrated in November of 2676, about two and half years 
ago. Im Im
All the emotions of the past few days flooded over me. I closed my eyes, and the 
pain washed over and over and over me. All my friends. All my comrades. And the 
man I loved, the man I was to marry. I wanted to weep, but couldnt, it hurt so 
bad. It was as though a massive weight was crushing me and not allowing me to 
breathe deep enough to start the tears. I opened my eyes and blinked them a few 
times. Eyer waited patiently, a look of understanding in her green eyes.
Im sorry, Abigail. Lets pick this up later, okay?
No no. Thats okay, Sergeant. I think Id like someone to be here right now. 
I smiled weakly. And youre a vast improvement on Cooper.
She smiled back. A box of greasy machine parts is a vast improvement on Cooper. 
And call me Jody. Okay, well continue. Its probably better this way anyway. 
Otherwise youd have to spend too much time with the Lieutenant.
We continued my debriefing for another hour. Although I was starting to feel 
comfortable with Jody, and I knew I should report a fully as I could, I did 
withhold some information. The main piece was my familiarity with the 
puterverse. I didnt feel bad or guilty about that; not many in the Third knew 
the full story, and those few considered my achievements to be secret. I 
continued that approach and only mentioned that I was good in the puterverse.
Really? Jody seemed very interested. Thats going to come in handy here. 
Nearly everyone we recruit has only a nominal skill in the puterverse. What 
level do you access at?
Now there was a good question. The fact was that I no longer used level access 
protocols. Id bypassed them about a year ago, seeing them as nothing but a 
burden. Once I saw the proper way to access the puterverse through unbound 
trinary code, it was so so obvious that the only real way to use the 
puterverse was with an oscillated structured broadcast. But I couldnt tell her 
that and stay out of a straight jacket at the same time. Nor could I tell her 
the last restricted plateau I had used was level sixty-seven untethered. I dont 
think anyone had been higher than thirty for more than a few seconds--level 
thirty was as far as anyone could go without UTC shielding--and then only at a 
horrible price. And I knew that I was the only one who even knew there were 
three levels above the accepted maximum of sixty-four. So I made a suitable 
number up.
I used twelve limited fifteen for that New Denver raid I mentioned earlier. At 
her doubtful look, I added, But that was a special circumstance. My normal 
access is nine straight up.
She seemed satisfied with that and moved on. I felt a little proud of myself. A 
teenagers first urge is to normally show off, often with the best of 
intentions, but show off nonetheless. I had resisted that temptation and for a 
while felt a little better.
We finished the debriefing eventually and Jody stood up, stretching.
Ill get this reported to Lieutenant Posen right away. Sorry, but you know I 
have to inform him youre a sharded Cue. I nodded glumly. Id give anything to 
keep that information quiet, but knew that it simply had to be this way. Jody 
continued. Ill see what I can do about getting you a few of the things youll 
need to start fitting in. Clothes, billet, gear, that kind of stuff. Im pulling 
to get you in my company, if, she smiled wryly, you dont mind serving with 
lowly B dogs.
Well, I said with tongue in cheek, I suppose I could live with it. Although 
it is a little beneath me. I should be up serving with your top dogs. You know, 
like Cooper.
Jody laughed out loud and reset the shielding to exclude her. She gave a 
friendly wave and walked off. Cooper came back in and planted himself in front 
of my bed and turned his back to me, not forgetting to sneer first. I should 
have asked Jody if she could have dropped off my sidearm for me. A couple of 
shots with my sonic inducer in the back of Coopers head might have cheered him 
up. It certainly would have cheered me up.
* * * *
That night was the worst since my no, it was the worst in my life. During our 
trip, the hov was able to maintain enough energy to sustain me. I even made a 
little progress. But most of the time I was in a dim world not unlike the 
experience on the desert sand. I was not in my proper mind to grieve for my 
friends then. Now I was.
It was hard. Very hard. Knowing I would blame myself for living while they had 
died should have helped me but didnt. Not that night. It lasted forever, and I 
didnt sleep one minute. Neither, Im afraid, did Doctor Ressler. Shortly after 
I started from a fitful half-sleep, he was there to fiddle with my medicine and 
plasma duplication, perform unneeded examinations and fill out utterly useless 
medical history questions. In other words, he was there for me.
The anguish and sadness threatened to crush my ribs, the weight was so heavy. 
Only four nights ago, Aaron proposed to me underneath the stars. And now he lay 
buried in an unmarked pit under those same stars. That evening he had mused how 
we fought and gave up our normal lives, and no longer knew how to act like 
regular people, regular lovers. Yet even on an issued blanket, weapons close 
by and lying in a spot that was used by many others in our unit as their turn 
came, even in that regimented atmosphere we found a few hours of normalcy. We 
laughed and kissed and dreamed and and now it was gone, crushed by the very 
thing we had tried to escape for the sweetest and briefest of moments.
And Susie. With me since the day I became a Cue. I had woken up in a body that 
was ownerless and soulless. I had gone from being a mature, confident, strong, 
respected man of thirty-one to a scared, young, nearly helpless girl of 
fourteen. I was so disoriented, I wasnt even aware of what had happened. My 
body told me I was a young girl, and my mind listened, oblivious to the mistake 
that had been made. And when my mind finally saw the error, it nearly shut down.
Susie was there to help the whole way. She helped me realize who I had become, 
and I stepped away from the danger of withdrawing into a permanent shard and 
instead became the woman I was today.
The woman I was today. I sniffed and wiped away a small tear. I still was not 
able to fully weep for them, but a tear could come. The woman I was today. That 
is what I would live for. My friends would not wish to see me destroyed by this. 
I didnt believe in friends living on in the memories of the living. I believed 
in heaven and in hell, and in a loving God. But I did not see why I should not 
honor their memories, speak well of them, and live my life to show what they had 
done for me. I made my decision. Lying on my back with precious little strength, 
my life blood still being replenished and still helpless to the care of my 
doctor and under the watchful eye of a suspicious guard, I made my decision.
I would continue to live. I would be the Abigail Wyeth that Susie and Lieutenant 
Sanchez and Sarah and Dusty and and Aaron wanted me to be. Very few people 
outside of the Third Regiment knew my confused past. Other than the Kovins I 
couldnt think of anyone. I hadnt told Ressler yet, or Jody. And I certainly 
wasnt going to tell their Lieutenant Posen. Fine. Id let my past stay in that 
crater. My decision made, I could relax.
Doctor Ressler seemed to notice my calmness and mentioned casually that it just 
happened to be time to administer a mild sedative and that he wouldnt have to 
bother me again until morning.
A trace of warmth spread out from the ultraviolet light that oozed through my 
body, making it wonderfully relaxed. I gave him a slow, dreamy smile and my eyes 
closed on their own. He was a good man.
* * * *
Six hours later I didnt think he was such a good man. There was a fire in my 
right arm and I was feeling very queasy. Ressler was massaging my neck and 
shoulders and encouraging me to wake up, which seemed almost beyond me.
Abig--uh, Private Wyeth. I need you to wake up. Private! Wake up, please. You 
have a visitor.
Wha--what is it, Doctor? I opened my eyes, but the light stung, so I closed 
them again. How come my arm hurts? And my stomach feels so--
Im sorry, Private. I had to waken you prematurely from the sedative I gave 
you. Youd been asleep for only six hours, so I had to use a drug to wake you 
up. The uvive doesnt take such aggressive medication, so I had to use a light 
needle. Thats why your arm stings and why your stomach is upset. Both will wear 
off shortly.
Why did you wake me up?
Ill let Lieutenant Posen answer that one. His tone suggested that Lieutenant 
Posen himself was the answer.
Very good, Doctor. You may attend to your other duties.
I flickered my eyes open at looked at the source of the annoyed voice. Posen was 
at the foot of my bed looking down at me. Tall, thin and angular, he was dressed 
in a crisp, clean uniform and carried a tabinal like it was his best friend. He 
was consulting with his best friend now, no doubt going over Eyers debriefing. 
I felt the urge to interrupt him. I should have fought it down, but hey, I was 
young. And I was grumpy about being so rudely awakened.
Um, sir? He looked at me with a slightly annoyed look, and I felt a wicked 
taste of satisfaction. With the Lieutenants permission, could Doctor Ressler 
maybe grab me some breakfast from the mess? Im pretty hungry.
Oh, I hit the right button, all right! Being a teenager meant you always knew 
how to get an adults goat. He looked flushed and irritated. I saw his eyes 
flicker towards Cooper, and I realized Id made a big mistake. I shouldnt have 
done this in front of one of his men. Oops. I felt my satisfaction getting 
trampled by anger. Anger at myself. It was times like these I seriously 
considered having my mouth filled and sealed until I turned twenty and could 
handle such a dangerous weapon responsibly.
I think Doctor Ressler is far too busy a man to be handholding a rookie whos 
lying around in bed. You can wait for your breakfast.
Well, I had that coming, except for the rookie crack. But Id already blown it, 
so I would have to pay now. I resolved to behave myself and try to patch things 
up. Maybe he wasnt such a bad guy, given a chance.
Yes, sir. Im sorry, sir, I said contritely.
He ignored me and turned to the doctor.
Again, thank you, Doctor. Youre dismissed. He didnt wait for a reply, but 
spoke to Cooper. Private, you will remain at the ready during the debriefing.
Yes, sir! He leered at me and drew his pistol. I almost laughed, he looked so 
ridiculous. Doctor Ressler looked displeased, but left without saying anything 
with his mouth. His stiff walk spoke volumes.
Lieutenant Posen pulled up the stool Jody had used yesterday and put his foot on 
it. His boot was so highly polished that I could make out the faint purple 
reflection of the uvive. He continued to study the tabinal, but now he was doing 
it to establish some kind of superior position for the interview by making me 
wait. I let it bounce off me. If I stayed calm, I could still try to improve our 
poor start. He finally seemed to reach a point where he could begin. Without 
taking his eyes off the readout, he spoke.
According to this, you are Private Abigail Wyeth. You are--or rather were--the 
anchor for the first triteam of Company A in the Third Regiment. I carefully 
avoided looking at Cooper. You also say you have accessed the puterverse at 
level twelve And Sergeant Eyer reports that according to their findings, it was 
you who took out five NATech commandos in hand-to-hand all by your lonesome. 
Those last words didnt sound too good. I was getting a bad feeling. He set down 
the tabinal and looked directly at me.
So, tell me, Private, how does such a pretty young thing like you accomplish so 
much?
I felt a deep drop in the pit of my stomach that had nothing to do with the 
wakey-wakey drugs Ressler had given me. He didnt believe me. I had reported 
faithfully to him, except about my access levels and that was to lower them, and 
he didnt believe me.
I Im sorry, sir? I spoke slowly to hold my emotion in control, but I still 
felt my cheeks burning. What did you say, Lieutenant?
Oh come now, Private. You heard me clearly. I said, how could somebody as young 
as you actually have this kind of record, these kind of achievements?
Sir, Im sure Sergeant Eyer reported my my status? I glanced at Cooper this 
time. A Cue had to be very careful about admitting she was a Cue. We had no 
rights whatsoever, and were at the complete mercy of anyone who had the whim to 
harm us.
Posen saw my glance at Cooper and smiled. You mean your status as a sharded 
Cue? I flinched at his blunt, loud use of the phrase. Yes, she mentions it, 
although she doesnt go into detail. I take it youre claiming to have gotten so 
far up in the Thirds main enforcement Company by strength of your previous 
life?
Thats exactly what Im saying, sir. My expertise in combat comes from the 
service I gave to my country during the Ethiopian Campaigns of my time. My 
computer expertise is just hard work. I hedged a little on the last. Hed never 
believe that I not only knew Chris Young, the father of the webbing techniques 
still used, but that he had worked for me.
Ethiopian Campaigns, eh? He frowned. Thats the twenty-second century.
Twenty-first century, sir.
No, it was the twenty-second, Private.
This was getting stupid. With all due respect, sir, I said with rapidly 
thinning patience. I was there. It was the twenty-first century. I took a 
breath and plunged in. I had to establish my word as being valid. I served as a 
recon platoon leader from 2015 until 2018. I completed seventy-nine missions in 
that time and finished with a field commission of major.
Youre saying that they let women serve as officers that far back? Thats a 
little far-fetched, dont you think, Private? He had made the totally 
understandable assumption that I had always been a woman. I wouldnt correct 
him.
No, sir. Women served as officers as far back as the twentieth century. The 
United States had a female colonel during World War Two. And I believe a nation 
known as the Soviet Union had a female fighter pilot who was a Major during the 
same war. You know it as the Second Great War.
Hmm. He looked at his notes. And did you take out those five commandos?
Yes, sir. Thats how I picked up this wound.
And what were you doing out there with them?
I dont know, I answered truthfully. After the initial attack, Corporal 
Lendler and I had taken up position at the personnel entrance into the hanger. 
We were laying down crossfire on the NATech soldiers who were behind our hovs 
when I received orders to shift to a covering fire while the main group in the 
armory counter-attacked. Since the corporal and I had only sidearms, I--
A counter-attack? Thats suicide! How could you take on two brigades of NATech 
Xeno troops and hope to survive?
No hope involved, sir. They brought it to us. It would have been suicide not to 
counter-attack. As I was saying, sir, I needed to get heavier fire power to lay 
down a more effective cover. I had Corporal Lendler lay down a covering fire 
while I ran to a friend of mine and retrieved her plasma rifle. It was when I--
You said you gave orders to a corporal? And what about your friend? Did you 
just take her rifle? And how could a small thing like you hold such a big gun?
I was getting very tired of the Lieutenants belittling remarks. I waited a slow 
five seconds, then continued.
In the order you asked them, sir: I gave orders to a corporal because it was a 
combat condition and Im the anchor of Company As first triteam. Everyone, 
except Lieutenant Sanchez and Sergeants Thawell, Abdih and Halteman, follow my 
orders in a combat situation. As for my friend, she was dead, sir. Shed taken 
at slug through the head and an incendiary in her gut. Finally, Im small, sir, 
but Im also trained in over sixty weapons and twelve major categories of hand 
to hand combat.
He looked at me with disinterested, unbelieving eyes. Go on.
Yes, sir. Just before Id picked up the rifle, wed been hit with a plasma 
punch gun. Thats how I picked up this. I touched my right cheek. Small arms 
fire at that time damaged my jacket. Most of the bruises are faded on my back, 
but theyre still there. When I headed back, they punched us again, and the next 
thing I was aware of was waking up in the hov with three of their men pawing at 
me. I went wild and got lucky. I managed to kill all five, getting nicked during 
the free-for-all. I was heading back to the hanger when the whole area 
exploded.
I see. And what caused the two explosions that destroyed our base, two Xeno 
brigades and NATechs Fifteenth Armored?
I dont know, sir, I lied. There was a red glow in the sky and a loud scream. 
The impact was great enough that it turned my hov around from four kilometers. 
The next missile hit only seconds later. The shock wave from that one destroyed 
the hovs gyro and grav integrity field and threw me, tearing open my knife 
wound.
A missile, you say? Then you do know what happened?
No, sir, I dont. I think it was a missile. I know we dont have guns that 
heavy and accurate, or that can do that kind of damage. It must have been a 
missile. Dont you think so, sir?
He hardened his face at my question. What I think is none of your concern, 
Private. He stepped over to the panel and placed the shielding on, careful to 
stand outside it. The sound shield remained off. Posen had things to say.
Frankly, Wyeth, I dont believe a word you are telling me. This is too 
preposterous, too outrageous, too fanciful to be real. I mean, look at you!
I realize Im not at my best, sir. And I realize I dont look like much. But I 
am telling you the truth. Im not overly fond of using my combat skills when 
unneeded, but make no mistake, sir, I am a dog.
That remains to be seen, Wyeth. You will remain here under guard until I can 
verify your identity and your story. Maybe you were assigned to the Third in a 
support role as a clerk or laundress or cook. Or maybe youre a rookie with a 
chance to impress us with this fanciful story. But my guess is youre a girl one 
of the men brought back from Alexandria for an evenings entertainment.
That last one did it. He had systematically shredded my word, my patience and 
now my character. My face flushed and I rose to my elbow.
Sir, I will follow your orders as you give them to me. I will perform the 
duties you assign me to the best of my ability. And I will gladly die for my 
fellow dogs in the 179th even though Ive never met them. But if you ever call 
me a prostitute again, Lieutenant, I will kill you.
You say you doubted my word and my abilities. Im telling you right now, sir, 
that had I been off this machine, I could have killed you and Cooper in less 
than five seconds, and not one sound would have escaped this sickbay. I told 
them in detail what I would have done, and Coopers shocked face told me he 
understood completely.
You have no idea what happened, I continued. Nor do you have any idea what 
kind of service Ive given over my life. Ive seen more combat than you, in two 
different centuries, and Ive survived it all.
I dont expect to be instantly given previous authority and position. Neither 
do I expect you to swallow everything Ive told you without checking, though I 
doubt youll find a way to check either the battle or my twenty-first century 
service. I do expect, however, to be given the benefit of the doubt, and given 
respect as a person despite my non-rights status. And I expect I expect
Everything became woozy and I was forced to lie back down. Ressler must have 
been watching, for he rushed up, shutting off the field.
Thats enough! Lieutenant, I must insist that you leave. His tone, which 
reached me with a dim echo, carried authority that had to be obeyed. You may 
continue this debriefing later. Tomorrow, perhaps. Right now, Private Wyeth 
needs to be kept quiet. Shes still weak from blood loss. And take Cooper with 
you. You have my assurance that she is incapable of leaving her bed for at least 
another forty-eight hours.
Im sorry, Doctor, but your assurance is not enough. Shes made it clear to us 
that she could become hostile, despite her small size. Cooper. Cooper stepped 
alongside the bed, brushing the doctor back. He smiled wickedly at me and 
reached for the panel over my bed. I felt a flash of heat in my right arm, and a 
large animal, maybe a horse, sat on my chest. My eyesight faded, although I 
dont know that I closed my eyes.
Wait! Step away from that! This is a medical
Ressler didnt stop talking. I just stopped listening.


Chapter Two
And the tour ends here. Jodys swept her hand toward a corner in the womens 
barracks. My newly issued gear was lying on the stripped bed with blankets and 
sheets roughly folded and sitting on my pillow.
Thanks, Jody. Ill have to owe you the nickel, though. Im a little light right 
now. I opened my foot locker--some things never change--and tried to picture 
how I wanted to place my things in there.
A nickel? Why would you owe me metal?
I smiled. Sorry, ancient expression. A nickel was a coin of value in that time, 
worth five percent of the main unit called a dollar. When you were taken on a 
whirlwind show of a place it was called the nickel tour.
Jody had started helping me put away my things but laughed at my explanation. 
That is so incredible! When did that expression first get started?
Around the late nineteenth or early twentieth century. Why?
I just find it so exciting to be talking to someone who actually lived at that 
time!
Well, I was born in 1995, so I just slipped in under the millennium My only 
memories of the twentieth century include wetting my pants in day care, losing 
my first tooth, and kissing my first I broke off and modified my sentence. 
having my first kiss when I was five years old.
Thats so cute! You actually had a crush on a boy when you were only five?
This was going to be difficult, dodging around these kinds of questions about my 
past. Maybe I should just jump right in. So I smiled.
A huge crush! Id wait for the number five bus during kindergarten, but he took 
the number three bus. It was amazing how easily I could switch the pronouns. 
Maybe not all that amazing, considering I had to do it to myself for over two 
years now. I thought if I was just fast enough, I could sit next to him on the 
way home. But I could never make it. There were two bells, see, and he got out 
on the first one and I got out on the second. I never thought
I stopped talking because Id clearly lost Jody. She was shaking her head as 
though I were speaking a different language.
What are you talking about, Abigail? Whats a bus? Whats kindergarten? Maybe I 
should take this a little slower.
Thats okay, Jody. I shouldnt really talk too much about it, anyway. I could 
get careless. But when we get a chance, Ill tell you about television and 
airplanes and baseball and lots of other things from the ancient mists of time. 
I spoke in as deep a voice as I could to make the end sound ominous. We both 
laughed.
We had finished unpacking and fixing up my bunk. I stepped back and admired the 
work. All right! Private Wyeth, reporting for duty! Just one thing missing.
Whats that?
My sidearm. I imagine you confiscated it until you could verify my identity and 
story. I glanced around to be sure the other dozen or so women in the barracks 
werent listening in. They were watching us on the sly, but couldnt hear us. 
Lieutenant Posen didnt look too pleased when he came to tell me I was to 
report to you for duty. I almost think he was hoping to find out I was a liar so 
he could ship me out of here.
Youre right, he wasnt happy. He was even less happy when orders came down 
that he had no choice about keeping you, at least for a while. She looked at me 
considering, Were never bothered by TAU, let alone given orders. You must be 
something special to have them issue orders about you.
I shrugged. I have a knack with the puterverse and planned many of our raids. 
TAU probably doesnt want that talent wasted. We used the word TAU as an 
acronym for Those Above Us. We didnt talk about the Resistance central 
organization too much, and they didnt deal with us too much, except to set up 
general coordination and shipping of surplus supplies and, in rare 
circumstances, to give a very specific order.
You planned some of those raids? How about the New Denver hit?
Uh-huh. That was last one I went on. I was laid up after that one.
Sorry to hear. Were you injured?
No.
Oh. She didnt press the point because it was rude to keep asking about 
something that you already know the answer to. So how did you know that the 
generator would explode? In fact, how did you even know to hit that facility?
We did our research and figured out how to bring down the weather net in just 
the right locations, times, and sequence to create the weather. As for the 
target, that took a lot of hard work before we determined it was a riping 
facility. Even then, we acted on a lot of empirical evidence.
I envy you, Abigail. We never take on targets that big. The Lieutenant is, 
well, never mind. Thats personal opinion, and not something a sergeant should 
share with one of her privates.
I understand. I kept my negative opinions of superior officers to myself, too, 
with my recon outfit. Anyway, back to the original question: When can I get my 
sidearm back?
You dont, Abigail. Sorry. She looked uncomfortable, which she should have. 
We keep all weapons locked away in the armory, and issue according to need.
Thats crazy! I said, my voice getting loud. A dog should always keep her 
sidearm handy! What if we get discovered and attacked?
Since it hasnt happened, the general feeling is that it wont. Besides, if 
NATech did decide to hit us, what good would small arms do against what they 
would throw at us? She sounded totally unconvinced with her own words, as 
though she were parroting something she didnt want to.
What good I broke off and lowered my voice. Youre not serious, are you, 
Jody? What kind of an attitude is that to take? The Third was never hit before 
last week, and now theyre My voice caught. And now theyre gone. But if we 
didnt have our guns with us, we couldnt have responded with any sort of 
effectiveness. I know we couldnt have gotten to the armory where we kept the 
big guns. As it was, it took the Fifteenth Armored and two full brigades to take 
us out. And precious few of them survived.
Thats enough, Private! This isnt the Third, this is the 179th. And in the 
179th, you will obey our procedures. Jody didnt say it with relish, but she 
said it.
Okay, Sergeant, I blushed a bit; I had stepped out of line. But we will get 
our own sidearm when they are issued, right?
Why? her eyes narrowed.
I had Dusty, our weapons specialist, make some modifications. If you dont know 
what youre doing, you can do some serious unintentional damage. I didnt 
elaborate.
I see. Ill speak to the Lieutenant about assigning that specifically to you, 
though we normally dont. She held up her hand. I dont want to hear it.
I sighed. All right. Just make sure nobody fools with it unless Im there. 
Moving along, now. How about puterverse access? Do I have any clearance yet? 
Access to the puterverse was limited only by the users rights, which everyone 
had in varying degrees. But it was possible in isolated areas like our base to 
limit access to the terminals, requiring special voice coding prior to entering 
the puterverse voice access code. I had woken from my drug induced sleep four 
days ago and I still didnt have terminal access. I didnt care what access they 
gave me; once in the puterverse, I could do whatever I wanted. But first I 
needed terminal clearance.
Sorry, but you not only dont have it yet, its unlikely the Lieutenant is ever 
going to give it to you. You dont rate clearance.
I dont rate clearance? I replied, stunned. Jody, anybody who can breathe 
rates clearance! I have to get on! Ive got some details to take care of, and 
some personal business as well.
Abigail, Im sorry, but thats the way it is here. You can access under my 
account, but only for five minutes at a time and only with me in control. If 
either of us breaks those rules, Ill lose my terminal clearance as well. 
Please, dont push it.
I didnt push it, but I was getting upset and more than a little nervous. If I 
stayed off too long, Mike would assume I was dead and would begin accessing the 
UTC sequences that gave him permission to begin detonating the UTC charges we 
had been laying for the past year and a half. I didnt want that to happen yet 
because the pattern wasnt fully laid and wouldnt be for several more months. 
On top of that, I hadnt even begun creating the safety zones needed to protect 
non-NATech sites from serious damage Even then I lacked the one piece of 
information that would make detonations fully justifiable: the source of the 
limitations that had been placed on the puterverse.
I still had a month left before Mike would access the permissions, but there was 
no point in letting these things go until the last minute. Yet I also couldnt 
let Jody control my access to the puterverse. Not only was I hesitant to let 
others see Mike and Kiki, but taking Jody to my plane of existence in the 
puterverse would kill her. Belatedly--as seemed to be my habit--I realized that 
had I put the safeguards in first, instead of the UTC charges, this wouldnt 
even be a problem.
All right, I wont push, Jody. But see if you can get me access, okay? Even a 
sub-level would help a lot.
Ill see what I can do. In the meantime, let me take you over to your new 
detail.
We left the barracks and headed down the tunnel--unlike our corridors, this was 
a very quick job--toward the mess hall. I had a sinking feeling in my stomach we 
were heading for the laundry.
Jody took me to the laundry door, then walked past it. I breathed a sigh, but 
then let out a small groan.
Jody! Not KP! Centuries after its coining, the word KP still struck fear and 
despair into the hearts of even the most hardened soldier.
What? she smiled sweetly. Are you too good for KP?
Yes! I mean, no. No, Im not too good for it, every dog draws the detail sooner 
or later. But I do mean yes. I dont think this is taking full advantage of my 
training and expertise. She grabbed me by the arm and pulled me to a corner.
You dont think I know that, Abigail? I know it was you that took out those 
five commandos in hand-to-hand. I believed you when you said you were Triteam 
One anchor. And I believe you when you told me about your puterverse skill. 
After the debriefing was over--mine, not the Lieutenants--I would have paid 
real creds to get you in my company with full access to the puterverse. Giving 
you KP is like using a phase hov as a paperweight.
But this is the way it has to be. I dont run this outfit and I do follow 
orders. The Lieutenant was livid at being told what to do with you. I think it 
hurt his feelings that a kid like you rated such attention.
So he put me here? Why? Why doesnt he take advantage of me? If TAU thinks Im 
useable, why doesnt Lieutenant Posen use me?
I dont know. If I did, I wouldnt tell you. But no, he didnt put you here. I 
did.
Jody!
I put you here because the Lieutenant wanted to put you on a Company A recon 
team.
That doesnt sound too bad.
It is. They hit the jungle for three weeks per loop. All they do is drink, 
sleep and get sick. Unless theres a woman with them. Then they find other 
things to do. If you came back a virgin, it would be because you had killed the 
entire team.
Her words came as little surprise to me, which was scary. The 179ths Company A 
was shaping up to be a different kind of animal than the Thirds.
But I didnt put you here to save your virtue. She smiled and winked. My 
guess is you can protect yourself enough, though I cant see how you do it with 
such a small frame.
The reason I put you here is so you can be my little spy. She held up a hand. 
Sorry, I shouldnt have said little.
At least calling me little is truthful. Calling me your spy
Sorry again. A bit of the dramatic in me. Too many romance novels. Come on, 
lets grab some coffee and Ill explain.
So we sat down and had some coffee and hot chocolate, and Jody gave me the 
details. By the time shed finished, I knew this was one seriously messed up 
outfit. I also knew that Id be her little spy, and told her so.
Thanks, Abigail. I hope Ill get a chance to use what you tell me. Otherwise, 
well be stuck in this scavenger mode forever. She rose. Well, its time for 
afternoon defense classes. Youre welcome to come along, though I dont think 
youll learn much. Class is two hours. Your start duty in three hours. The lunch 
and dinner shift goes ten hours from 1000 to 2000.
One last thing, Jody. My price tag. Even Mata Hari got paid.
Mata who?
You should study up on your history, Jody. She was a famous spy in the early 
twentieth century.
That was almost eight hundred years ago!
So talk to more Cues. Or access the historical libraries. But dont change the 
subject. My price.
You want me to pay you? You ungrateful little bitch! Her tone took all the 
sting out of the words. I just saved you from Company A recon!
Sounds more like you saved Company A recon from me. Doesnt matter. Im now 
performing duty above and beyond the call of duty. So I want compensation. Two 
things. One: Nobody uses my sidearm but me.
I can do that. Pritchard, our armory master, owes me a couple. And number two?
You have got to get me access to the puterverse. Ill take you along, but it 
must be me accessing.
Why? she asked a little suspiciously. It seemed some of the paranoia here 
rubbed off on everyone.
I cant tell you as much as show you. But thats my price.
She looked at me carefully. Ill be honest with you, Abigail. Its been very 
hard visualizing you as a Cue. Ive met so very few. You look like a sixteen 
year old girl
Thats because I am a sixteen year old girl.
Yes and no. Youve got memories and training and skills that Ill never have in 
my entire life. I can see why Lieutenant Posen would be envious. Hes in his 
thirties and is a lieutenant. Youre sixteen and have made major.
Believe me, Jody, I doubt he would want to take the path Ive taken.
Probably not, but hes just looking at the result. So am I. But while Im a 
little envious, too, Im also glad for you and sorry for you. She paused, then 
nodded. Itll take a couple weeks, but Ill get you access.
Fair enough. I finished my hot chocolate. Now lets see what kind of workouts 
you people have. I need to limber up some.
We stopped off long enough to get me into a workout uniform. I was just a little 
self-conscious about changing in front of so many unfamiliar women, but I 
figured I had to get used to it. I was even more self-conscious when I saw some 
eyes open when they looked at me. At first I thought they were staring because, 
well but it wasnt that.
They were looking at my scar. I looked at it, too. It was still red and wicked 
looking. Although Doctor Ressler had done a good job, wed been too far from 
base for full treatment, so the scar would be permanent. Running in an almost 
horizontal line across my lower chest, it branched out in several places where I 
had ripped it open after being thrown from the destroyed hov. I looked up, 
smiling shyly.
Not too pretty, huh?
Nobody said anything, but one of them, an athletic looking blonde with hazel 
eyes, smiled a little. I finished dressing and followed them to the workout 
area.
It was basic and simple. An open space with a treated floor that would soften on 
bodily impact, but remain hard to footfalls and other forms of striking. We 
spread out and started stretching. I noticed, with some concern, that we were 
all women.
After about five minutes, the Lieutenant and another man walked in on us. 
Immediately everyone took her place. I nudged the woman next to me.
What kind of defense class is this? Where are the men?
She motioned me to be quiet. I heard the Lieutenant clear his voice.
Good afternoon, ladies. I take it youve finished warm ups. Well begin 
immediately. Sergeant Olecki?
The big man stepped up and before he so much as spoke a word, I didnt like him. 
He seemed brutish and condescending. He looked at us as though we were a bunch 
of little girls, our hair still in pigtails.
All right, well pick up from where we left off last week. His eyes scanned 
the thirty of us. He came to me, but looked right past me, settling on a tall 
woman far to my left. Stingle, well work with you first.
She rose and took position. Olecki went to a standard basic attack position, and 
Stingle went to the defensive. She had no more than set when she was on her 
back, gasping. Olecki was quick, Ill give him that. He helped her to her feet.
Thats why were going to work on todays defensive positions. Had Stingle 
known the move Im going to teach you today, she would have easily blocked my 
attack.
I felt my face get red as my blood began to heat up. He was nothing but a bully. 
Why in world would you injure someone just to show the importance of something 
you hadnt taught yet? I nudged the woman next to me again.
What is it with this guy? And whats with these basic moves? Are you all 
rookies or something?
She looked like she didnt want to answer, but did. Quiet! Some of us have only 
been here for a year, and these defense tactics take time to learn. And when 
we--
Vetter! The woman stiffened at her name, and I saw a quick look of fright 
cross her face. Fear? Over a workout? I felt the beast in me and quickly fought 
it down.
She rose silently and went to the sergeant. She assumed her position, again a 
defense posture, one arm close to her body, the other at right angles. Olecki 
closed fast and struck for her head. She deftly blocked it, but made no counter 
attack. Too late, she saw his right foot step in. She swung free, avoiding the 
leg, but leaving herself wide open for the right arm that thudded into her ribs. 
She dropped and didnt move. The Lieutenant motioned, and two of the women up 
front helped Vetter to her feet. The three started off to sickbay, Vetter only 
barely conscious. I think I knew now why they had eight beds in sickbay.
It was my hope that you had all practiced over the past week. Lieutenant 
Posens voice had the disapproving tone of a disappointed father. That hasnt 
happened, Im afraid. Very well. Sergeant Olecki will review last weeks lesson 
before going into this weeks. As always, any injuries are a result of your poor 
preparation. Im sorry, but you will learn the importance of defending against a 
superior aggressor.
I had had enough of this. The practice was only three minutes old and two women 
had been injured. That wouldnt be so bad if we were also learning something; 
getting hurt comes with the uniform. But the way I saw it, the only thing these 
people were learning was how to be useless. I stood up.
With the Lieutenants permission, Id like you to try me, Sergeant Olecki.
Every head swung toward me. The Lieutenant smiled slightly. Sergeant Olecki just 
stared.
Sit down, Private. Youre not ready for this level yet. Id just hurt you.
Thats all youre doing to the others now. I dont see you teaching us 
anything, Sergeant.
He took a step toward me. These Company A goons were great on posturing.
Very well, Private Wyeth, the Lieutenant spoke with his slick, clipped voice. 
You said you were on Company A in the Third. Lets give you an opportunity to 
show us how good they were. He emphasized the word were, and I felt myself 
tense up.
I walked up to the sergeant and assumed a defensive posture identical to 
Vetters. He smiled.
This will be quick. Dont worry, girlie, the doc can set broken bones quicker 
than anyone Ive seen. His arm shot forward toward my jaw.
He almost nailed me, too. I was upset enough; his calling me girlie with that 
tone of voice made me angry. But it was a bad, uncontrollable anger. I jerked my 
left arm up and deflected the arm past my head. He brought it down on my 
shoulder, trying to break it. I slid down, cushioning the blow, but still 
falling; he brought a leg across my chest, putting a knee to my breast. I 
blocked it down, but it hit my scar. I felt a stab of pain and grunted He 
stepped back.
Id heard you were an anchor. Looks like you were an anchor all right, holding 
everyone back.
I wanted to kill him, but in the wrong way. I rose to my feet and took a couple 
of deep breaths, keeping my eyes on him. I approached him and went to defensive.
Again, Sergeant.
With pleasure, Wyeth.
He shot in, using his left leg for a feint to my groin and bringing his head 
down as the main attack. I jerked my own head back and felt his forehead thud 
into my chest, knocking the breath out of me. I didnt pay any attention to that 
attack, however. I wanted to see how he positioned the rest of his body during 
the attack. I had my right leg against the inside of his and kept my eyes on his 
arms as they spread wide with the hit. I again slid down, softening the blow, 
but going to the ground. He stepped back smiling. The Lieutenant also had a 
smile on his face.
I stood up. I had his measure now. I could feel his weight shifting while my leg 
was pressed against his, and knew he had very poor balance. He was a clumsy 
brute. With the kind of training I was used to, I could attack and defend 
aggressively because I knew my opponent would be well trained, and was capable 
of at least deflecting my blows. But I had to be careful with Sergeant Olecki. I 
wanted to teach him a lesson, not kill him. I stepped into the same defense.
And once more, Sergeant.
He laughed.
I think youve had enough! Sit down and maybe I can teach you something.
You cant teach me a thing, Sergeant. I know your moves, and theyre very basic 
and poorly executed. You might be all right for boot camp, but you wouldnt even 
rate Company C in the Third, and they were rookies. So, once more, rookie.
Just as he had thrown me off with his taunts, I now threw him. He didnt even 
set up but went straight to his attack. He kicked up to put his left foot in my 
chest, and again he almost nailed me. But this time he almost nailed me because 
I wanted it that way. The object of hand-to-hand was not to make the opponent 
miss by a lot, but by a little. If I kept him in close, I could counterattack, 
which I now did.
I sidestepped his awkward kick and slid in along his leg. Putting my left foot 
on his planted right ankle, I grabbed his thrusting left leg with both hands and 
lifted it about a half meter. I now had him bent away from me, his left leg in 
the air, his arms flailing to maintain the balance that focused all his weight 
on his right ankle. In normal circumstances, my opponent would already be 
disabled by my next move. If it were a combat situation, he would be dead. But I 
stopped at this point because it was time to teach everyone a lesson.
I can now do one of three things, Sergeant, I said with my best instructors 
voice to the suddenly attentive women. I can lift your leg another half meter 
while shifting my girlie weight to your right ankle, crushing it. As a bonus, 
I could collapse your right knee with my right foot while letting you fall to 
the ground.
Or I can release your left leg and send either my right fist or right foot into 
your groin, turning the contents of your scrotum into a fine paste. Several 
laughs escaped from the crowd.
Either of those attacks would disable you, Sergeant, but I think Ill do the 
third attack, the one I prefer. I released one hand and slipped my knife from 
my left boot. With my right hand below his knee, I jerked his left leg down. The 
movement was so quick that he was unprepared for his suddenly regained balance. 
He landed on his feet and our bodies were right next to each other, my knife 
hand, blade down, clenched just under his breast bone.
This is a seventeen-centimeter boot knife, and if I had given you the blade 
instead of the hilt, it would be tickling your heart right now. Youre dead, 
Sergeant Olecki. I pushed him away and turned to sit down.
I heard a grunt and quick step behind me. The idiot! It had been practice, now 
it was real. Flipping the knife away so I wouldnt be tempted to use it, I 
dropped flat, twisting my body over and pulling it in. Of course he went for 
where my head was. He was fairly tall, but he had stooped to deliver his blow.
Partially coiled on my back and shoulders now, I jerked straight and shot my 
right foot at his unprotected head. At the last instant, I unlocked my knee and 
flattened my foot so the sole caught him squarely where his jaw joined the upper 
throat. Had I left my foot pointed with a locked leg, the attack would have 
broken his neck. This way, the blunted kick spread the impact so more could be 
taken by his shoulder muscles.
His head snapped and he lurched forward, his momentum carrying him into the 
front row of women. They were apparently nervous about terrible rumors going 
around of having the Sergeants head in their laps, because they generously gave 
him the whole floor to fall on. As he hit softly, I regretted the downside of 
technology that still couldnt tell the difference between a real person hitting 
the floor and a jerk hitting the floor.
I stepped over him and sat down, sheathing my recovered knife. Lieutenant 
Posens face was study in scarlet. Red ears, red face, even his eyes seemed to 
have a red tint to them. I dont know what he was so mad about.
On your feet, Wyeth!
But it wasnt the Lieutenant who said gave the order. It was Jody, who stood 
behind us. I went straight to my feet and stood at attention. Anything Jody was 
going to tell me, I was going to do. Better her than Posen.
How dare you attack a sergeant! What excuse do you have for your actions? She 
shouted, her mouth only centimeters from my face.
Well, it was a drill and--
I dont want to hear it, Wyeth! I dont want to hear it because there is no 
excuse! She pointed to three of the women near me. You three! Get Sergeant 
Olecki to sickbay immediately! I want the Lieutenant to have a full report 
within ten minutes! Got it? From the way they jumped, Id say they got it. Jody 
turned back to me.
Well, youve messed things up nicely, Wyeth! Seems to me you should be the one 
to fix them up.
One moment, Sergeant Eyer. Posen had stepped up, trying to take over the 
situation. I hoped Jody knew how to handle herself. She did.
Excuse me, sir. All due respect, sir, but this is a disciplinary action that is 
beneath your attention. Since Wyeth is my problem, Ill take care of her and 
report to you within the half-hour. Sir! She saluted sharply, and I thought 
shed kissed up to him too much. No way hed buy this.
But he did. His face color went closer to normal and he visibly relaxed. The 
most important thing to him, keeping face in front of his troops, was achieved. 
I made a mental note to not show him up again in public. I wished it was a 
mental note Id use. Sadly, I knew it wouldnt be. Officers like Posen really 
bugged me.
Very well, Sergeant. See that this this private is suitably disciplined. I 
will not tolerate such violence under my command. And Id like that report 
within fifteen minutes, not thirty.
Jody saluted again. Of course, sir. Thank you, sir.
Posen stalked off, the proud commandant having solved another impossible 
scenario, to bask in his success in handling soldiers. He was a proud man. A 
proud man and something of an ass.
All right, Wyeth! Lets take care of you, first. She looked over toward our 
departing leader, continuing to cuss me out until he was gone from sight. She 
brought her focus back to me, making me the center of everyones attention.
Since youre the one whos injured poor Sergeant Olecki, it seems to me that 
you should fill in for him while hes laid up. If I could, Id give you ALL his 
duties until he returned. Maybe longer, just to teach a lesson. She carefully 
avoided mentioning who was going to learn the lesson, but everybody caught it.
Regrettably, I cant do that. I can give you this duty though: Until poor 
Sergeant Olecki is sufficiently recovered from his terrible injuries, her eyes 
were sparkling, youre in charge of hand-to-hand combat training for the women 
of the 179th. Is that clear, Private?
I would have paid real money to have saluted right then and there. But Jody 
wasnt an officer. She just should have been one.
I understand, Sergeant! Ill do the best I can.
You better! Starting now!
Nobody cheered, but I could feel the relief going over the crowd. Jody stepped 
back and I walked to the front, facing my new class.
All right, class, pay attention! First things first, dogs! Get on your feet! 
Everyone jumped to their feet. Good! Now lets learn a little about defense, 
shall we? What Sergeant Olecki and I just demonstrated was the proper way to 
defend, by going over to the attack as quickly as possible. Ive discovered its 
easier to defend against dead enemies than live ones. Scattered smiles 
appeared. As Sergeant Olecki so capably showed us, someone whos unconscious, 
bleeding, or dead is normally in a poor position to attack you. I shook my head 
in wonder. Truly, the man has a gift. More than a few laughs broke out, and I 
was ready to start.
My first class was two hours. I spent the first ten minutes finding out what 
they already knew, which was precious little. I had no idea why these women had 
been taught so little, and I couldnt think of any good reason. I wondered if 
the men were as poorly trained. With someone like Olecki in charge of A Company, 
they probably were.
We continued basic training, but at a much accelerated pace, and with an 
attitude toward the offensive. They eagerly took my approach and caught on 
quick. I only bruised a couple of them, and cut one. Most had strained muscles 
and sore hands. But they were a happy crowd when we dismissed. They knew their 
opponent was not indestructible, and they werent made of porcelain. Just that 
change in attitude made for a successful class.
Jody and I waited for the last of them to leave then made for her quarters. I 
wanted to clean up, but decided to wait until the showers were less crowded. It 
was always best for a drill instructor keep some distance, at least until she 
had earned her students respect. Besides, that blonde with the hazel eyes was 
looking at me funny. Her smile stirred an uncomfortable memory of of 
something.
Jodys quarters were just like Sus my old one had been. Small, efficient, but 
with only one bed. She pulled out a new uniform--she had rejoined us in the last 
half hour of drills and was pretty good--but seemed in no hurry to go.
That was a first rate class you gave, Abigail. Were you an instructor?
Not with the Third, Jody. I did some training during the Ethiopian campaigns, 
though, and things
What Ethiopian campaigns? We dont have anything going on over there, do we?
No, no. Im talking about my first service in the early twenty-first century. I 
gave my men training as needed before missions.
She looked like Id slugged her in the face with a two-by-four. She stared, 
trying to take in what Id just told her.
You you served that far back? I--I--Abigail, that sounds so incredible! She 
shook her head. Im not calling you a liar. Its just that Wow! That was six 
and half centuries ago!
I know. Its hard to explain. I wonder what shed say if I told her the whole 
truth. I take it 179th doesnt deal with too many Cues?
No, we dont. When I was in the Thirty-fifth Regiment, we cued as many as two a 
month. But here? She shrugged. Like I said, we tend to take low risk missions, 
and only every other month or so. Weve never rescued a ripe, though most are 
ready to give it a shot.
Never? Now its my turn to be incredulous, Jody. In just the two years Ive 
been serving, weve rescued over fifty ripes.
Dont rub it in. And I dont want to talk about it, as its a sore point.
Sorry. Oh, I meant to ask a couple of questions. One, can I increase the number 
of classes to three a week? And two, am I off kitchen duty now?
Yes and no. Yes, you can increase them. I was going to ask you to anyway. You 
taught them more today than theyve learned in past six months. And no, youre 
not off kitchen duty. In fact, youre on kitchen duty in thirty minutes. Im 
tempted to give you a little extra time between the drills and kitchen duty, but 
the Lieutenant would have my head mounted on his wall if I did.
What is it with him and Olecki anyway? I think youre right, the Lieutenant 
doesnt like being pushed around by TAU. But that doesnt come anywhere near to 
explaining the pleasure he seems to get out of our people getting roughed up. 
And thats another thing. How come you train separately? And why is it so basic? 
I cant believe that its taken a whole year to get so little training in. Has 
Olecki been the instructor the whole time? Why not you? Youre much better than 
he is. I can tell. So why is he doing something he--
Jody clapped a hand over my mouth, laughing.
Its going to be hard thinking of you as a Cue, Abigail, but Im having no 
difficulty thinking of you as a teenager. Well talk later, after your shift. 
Ill stop by about twenty minutes before you get off and well eat together. Now 
go get cleaned up and report. Scoot!
She turned me around and pushed me out the door. Jody reminded me of Susie. Oh, 
Susie! I went to the womens barracks to gather my uniform and get ready. Id 
like to tell you my mood, but I just didnt know.
* * * *
Private Wyeth, reporting for detail! I announced to a large man with his back 
to me. He turned around and looked me up and down carefully. He was sweaty and 
his shirt was spattered with dough and sauce and I dont know what else. He 
looked like a walking seven-course meal. I had a horrible thought that I had 
just drawn another Jackson detail. Jackson had abruptly disappeared a few weeks 
after he goaded me into my first sharding episode and nobody had tried too hard 
to find him. That didnt mean there werent other Jacksons around. And an 
inactive unit like this would really draw them.
You aint much on size, are you Wyeth? Well, that doesnt matter. Well keep 
you busy. He smiled broadly and shoved out a dough-encrusted hand. My names 
Hank. How bout you start out with dishes and well get acquainted. During lunch 
and dinner, Ill put you out on the floor, cleaning tables.
Great. Call me Abigail. I shook his sticky paw, then looked at my own. So, 
what are we serving for lunch, Hank?
He inspected his own mitt. Not sure, exactly. Its got a lot of flour in it, 
though. Some sauce, too. Id have a better idea if I knew how to cook. Oh, 
well.
So I spent the next ten hours washing dishes and cleaning tables. Like with the 
laundry, society had made some advances, but they werent to be counted among 
the 179ths assets. As Hank had pointed out, theres wasnt much need for labor 
saving devices when there was so much cheap labor lying around collecting dust. 
I appreciated his point, but wished it wasnt being demonstrated on me.
Hank may have joked about not knowing how to cook, but he was really very good. 
This outfit didnt offer choices for their meals. You ate what was served or 
went hungry. Fortunately, Hank was a top-notch chef For lunch we had a kind of 
pizza, only he used a good deal of corn and.
CUCUMBER PASTE WITH DILL
cucumber paste with dill mixed into the dough. It was an unusual taste, but 
delicious, too. Dinner was fish with lemon. I had always enjoyed lemon on fish, 
but it didnt seem right. I would have just used a little salt
I shook my head and returned to my dishes. Miss DeChant had been an excellent 
cook for Professor LeClaire, and if I kept up this line of thought, Id be in 
danger of sharding. Id need to be very careful about that.
Quitting time rolled around and I gratefully peeled off my overapron and hung it 
up. Hank walked in from the serving line.
Ready to go already? he said with mock shock. How can you leave such a fun 
place? Well, go ahead and abandon me then. May as well take this. He brought 
out a plate and offered it to me.
It had a piece of the pizza from lunch. He must have seen me making a pig out of 
myself on it earlier. Using sauce, hed bordered the triangular slice and then 
put a line across the middle, making a red A. I giggled.
Why, thank you, Hank. Ill assume thats a red A, and not a scarlet letter!
He looked puzzled until I told him what I meant. Then he turned as red as the 
sauce. Hearing my laughter, he recovered his composure.
No, thats not what I meant! He laughed. I just wanted to say thanks. You 
really worked your tail off, and thats nice to see. I like it when someone 
takes their work seriously.
Hey, we all serve as we can, Hank. Ill see you tomorrow, okay?
Count on it. We never close. I, personally, havent slept since April 6, 2664. 
This kitchen is my life. He shook his head. And that is so depressing. Good 
night.
I went out into the mess area, looking for Jody. She said shed meet me here 
right after my shift, to let me tell her what Id picked up while bussing the 
tables. I had some interesting tidbits, mainly about the morale of the outfit 
and gripes against Company A personnel. This was a badly damaged unit.
But she must have been held up or forgotten, for the hall was empty. So was her 
room when I stopped by. I considered asking the computer for her location, then 
remembered I had no access. It didnt matter too much, though. It wasnt as 
though what I had to say was all that important. Munching my pizza, I trudged 
off to the showers to prepare for some serious sack time.
Forty minutes later, clean and comfortable, I gratefully slipped under the 
covers. The barracks, which held perhaps sixty bunks, was half full. Most 
everyone was asleep, but there were a couple groups talking quietly. They looked 
over at me when I entered, and a few of them waved, but they left me to myself. 
For tonight, that was fine. I wanted to get adjusted to my new schedule and also 
let everyone know me a little better--and I them--before I started mixing up 
with groups. So I waved back and rolled over on my back, putting my hands behind 
my head. The dark, shadowy ceiling was five meters up, just the right distance 
for contemplating both it and my future.
And what kind of future did I have? I was a sharded Cue in danger of becoming a 
full-fledged Shard. All my friends were dead and the stability they represented 
had been torn from me. I could and would begin making new friends. Even so soon 
after the attack I already counted Jody as a new friend. Hank, too, and Doctor 
Ressler.
Most of all, Aaron. Aaron, was gone. Hed been my first love, my only love. 
During my years as John--how strange it now seemed!--I had been very 
career-minded. And when I was drafted, it was into the US Recon Forces, where 
everyone was a soldier to be trained in camp and used in battle. My company had 
had thirty-one women in it over the three years I was in command, but I only 
noted it as a quick general estimate of their advantages and disadvantages in 
combat scenarios. As I came to know each of my soldiers, I refined my assessment 
of them.
My chief had recruited me into NATech before Id finished my service, so there 
was no down time between the two. Once in NATech I had dated some women 
employees outside of my projects, but their faces were all forgotten, and not 
just because I no longer had any romantic interest in women. They had been only 
informal relationships, each one enjoyable but not deep. More friendly than 
romantic.
My parents had raised me to respect both myself and the women I dated, so I 
neither believed in nor practiced casual sex. And my faith, firmly established 
since infancy, held me in good stead. Because of this, I didnt dally with a 
womans affections in the twenty-first century, nor with a mans in the 
twenty-seventh. By the time of my accident at the age of thirty-one, and going 
through the first two years of my new life, I had not had one single long-term 
relationship. Until Aaron.
And now Aaron was gone. Could I have another? I knew in my heart that he would 
want me to, but it was far too soon. It still hurt too much. Oh, Aaron. I rolled 
over to my side and stared at the barracks.


Chapter Three
Psst! Wake up, Private!
My eyes snapped open and my hand shot for my pistol, which I kept at the top of 
my bed, below the mattress and against the wall. It wasnt there. But I always 
left it there when
I remembered where I was and settled down, feeling sleepiness creeping over me 
again. Thats right. I was in the womens barracks and was now a member of the 
179th Regiment, Company A. No, Company B. What had woken me? I lifted my head 
and looked around.
It was Jody. She was kneeling by my bed and shaking my shoulder. I moaned and 
plopped my head down, curling tighter around my pillow.
Go way.
She went from shaking to shoving.
Wrong answer, Wyeth. Get up. Now. She stood up and began rummaging through my 
trunk at the top of my bed. I went up to my elbows and was greeted by a face 
full of shirt. Here. Get dressed and meet me outside the hanger in five 
minutes.
I wanted to say something witty and cutting, but I had all the comeback response 
of strawberry jam. Besides, she was already gone. Moaning, I slowly dressed into 
a loose top and shorts. Stomping into my low shoes, a kind of sneaker, I trudged 
out to the hanger. I was really tired. I suppose it would be a few more days 
until I was back to full strength. I was fine for standard duties during the 
day. It was at night that it all caught up with me.
The hanger was deserted. Id never seen a hanger like this. We always had 
something going on, whether it was repair, raid preparation, or shipment 
unloading. Even during the quiet times it was always active since we ran the 
regiment in shifts. Apparently the 179th ran a single shift, and everybody slept 
at night.
I mentally shrugged it off and jotted it down as yet another example of unit 
unreadiness. If they ever wanted to get active, this regiment had a lot of work 
in front of it. I walked past the hovers and went up the ramp to the hanger 
shield By now I half expected it to be turned off. To conserve power or 
something. It was on, but I passed through with little resistance.
Jody was waiting for me on the other side. Sitting on a rock, she stood when I 
trudged over to her.
So, what do you think of the 179th, Abigail? she said without preamble.
Well, its hard to say. Ive only been active one day, Jody. And most of that 
was in the kitchen. So it would be difficult to pass--
So, what do you think of the 179th, Abigail? she repeated.
I dont see how you can even consider this a regiment, Jody. It seems to be 
equipped okay. And the structures in place. But everyone seems to be wasting 
their time. Theres no real training going on, the whole base is slipshod, 
security is a joke and what there is of it is directed toward enhancing the 
paranoia the whole place has towards NATech. I took a breath. Ive even seen 
it in you, Jody.
She looked away. Go on.
My one night cleaning tables just reaffirmed my first impressions. Theres very 
little camaraderie, talking is quiet and discouraging. And everyone seems to 
walk on eggshells around the Company A personnel. I dont blame them too much 
for that. Your Company A strikes me as a bunch of rough bullies. That might be 
okay if they pulled their weight in a fight, but if Sergeant Oleckis skills are 
any indication, theyd just be cannon fodder in combat.
Anything else?
Yes. Im not one for talking down officers, and Ill obey the orders Im given, 
but Lieutenant Posen strikes me as . I chose my words carefully here, having 
skills that would be better suited elsewhere.
She gave a short laugh. Thats incredibly diplomatic of you, Abigail. 
Especially for a youngster like you.
And your impressions are very close to accurate. This unit is as close to 
inactive as it can be. In the past four months, weve gone on five raids. Four 
of them--
Five raids in four months isnt too bad, I interrupted.
No? Four of them were salvage missions. The fifth one was a real target, a 
convoy supplying the Douala garrison. But it was called off ten minutes before 
contact.
Why? I yawned and rubbed my eyes. I couldnt seem to shake the cobwebs.
Officially? Because NATech reinforced the convoy halfway from Alexandria. 
Unofficially, because the Lieutenant canceled the raid due to uncertain risk 
factors.
Abigail, those reinforcements were a total of two transports each carrying 
twenty troops. The whole convoy didnt have one heavy gun and couldnt phase. 
Hell, we could take out the Douala garrison itself. We have the manpower and 
supplies. What we dont have is the drive and leadership.
Dont blow a gasket, Jody.
Whats a gasket?
Its a seal used to hold never mind. Im just saying dont let it eat you up. 
I have to admit Im very disappointed in the 179th myself. But what can I do?
She stared at me in the bright starlight.
What can you do? Abigail, Im surprised to hear that from you. You seem to have 
some pull with TAU. I was hoping I could talk you into getting the Lieutenant 
out of here and putting a decent officer in charge.
Now its my turn to say Im surprised to hear that from you. I was wide awake 
now. My opinion of Jody took a nosedive. Youre not seriously suggesting a 
coup, are you? If you are, count me out. I dont like Lieutenant Posen. Hes an 
effete ass who has a low opinion of women, little ability to handle those under 
his command, and is castrated by his fear of NATech. But he is my commanding 
officer, and I will obey his orders and, if necessary, die for him. I took a 
step back. Ill not repeat what you said to anyone, but I dont think I want to 
work with you anymore, Sergeant. Good-night. I turned to leave.
Doctor Ressler was there, blocking my way. How he got behind me without hearing, 
I dont know. But there he was. I jumped back and reached for my boot knife. Too 
late, I realized I was in my short shoes and was unarmed. I whirled around. Jody 
would be the greater threat.
But she hadnt moved. She was just standing there, her arms behind her.
Okay, whats going on? I asked.
Good question, Abigail, Doctor Ressler spoke. Im sorry Sergeant Eyer had to 
do this. But we needed to find out how far you were willing to go. I cant tell 
you how relieved I am that you stopped where you did.
What are you talking about, Doctor? Were you listening to us?
I sure hope so, Jody said. Otherwise Id be in deep trouble for trying to 
incite a mutiny. Abigail Wyeth, let me introduce you to Doctor Scott Ressler. 
Major Scott Ressler, TAU Intelligence Arm.
He bowed at the waist. Pleased to make your acquaintance.
All right, I said tiredly. Give me some proof.
He snapped up from his bow. Jody stepped closer.
What did you say, Abigail? she asked.
I asked Doctor Ressler to show me some proof of his identity. What did you 
expect me to say, Jody?
I dont know exactly. But I expected more of a reaction from you. Suspicion 
crept into her voice. I know I certainly reacted when he told me his identity 
four months ago. And I consider myself a normal person. Which implied I wasnt 
normal. I wasnt offended; I wasnt normal. Ressler stayed quiet, allowing Jody 
to do the questioning.
So what do you want me to do? Run in circles? Faint? Slap my cheeks and shout, 
Oh, no! This cant be!? Get real, Jody. I used to do this kind of intrigue six 
centuries before either of you were born. If Ressler wants my cooperation, he 
has to prove his credentials. I glanced at him. Were you expecting something 
else, Doctor?
Well, yes, I was. I imagined that someone of your training and discipline would 
accept my word. Its a little surprising--
Stop treating me like a rookie, Doctor. Youre not surprised, or shouldnt be. 
You revealed yourself to me because you think Ill be useful to your mission. 
That must mean you have researched my background or have a high opinion of my 
intellect. Either way, you must have expected this. Jody looked like shed been 
sandbagged.
Very well, Private. Yes, I anticipated this. Lets go to the infirmary. Ill 
not only give you proof, Ill let you find it yourself.
What do you mean, Major? Jody was way out of her league. To be honest, that 
made me feel much better. Jody as a faithful and competent non-com was far 
better than Jody as a conspirator, regardless of the motives. She just didnt 
strike me as a cloak and dagger type.
What he means, Jody, is that hes going to give me puterverse access at what he 
thinks is my full level.
He smiled. What I know is your full level, Abigail. I know you wont accept 
this as proof, but let me say two words: UTC and Mike.
Both words hit home and very nearly convinced me that moment.
It looks like you are from TAU, Doctor. Or is it Major?
Its both. But I really am a physician, so I prefer doctor.
Whoa, whoa, whoa! Jody was waving her arms. This is getting out of hand. What 
are you two talking about? Whos Mike? Whats UTC? I thought I was the primary 
stooge in all this. Now I feel like baggage.
Believe me, Jody, youre not, I assured her. I dont know what you two are 
doing with the 179th, but what the doctor is referring to concerns me and 
NATech. Hes right, those two words have a huge impact on me. But hes also 
right that I dont accept it as proof of who he is. Now hes offering me the 
chance to verify it. I glanced at him. More importantly, for him, hes making 
sure Im who I say I am. Isnt that right, Doctor?
He smiled but said nothing and instead waved his hand toward the hanger 
entrance.
* * * *
All right, the sickbay is fully secured. Ive used my own codes to lock access, 
and the perimeter alarms have been set. You may access at any time, Private. 
Ressler sat near me and Jody behind us. I looked at him.
In a moment, Doctor. Before we do, Id like the two of you to prepare for a 
rough ride. Ill be able to shield most of the effects of my access, but not 
all. Also, it will take me a moment to enable shielding, so the first few 
seconds will be the worst.
Come on, Abigail. You told me you accessed at level twelve. Ive never been 
that high, but Im in pretty good shape. Lets get on with it.
Listen to her, Sergeant. We know for a fact that Private Wyeth has a current 
access of Level thirty-five. I once went to level twenty-eight for ten seconds 
and its like nothing youve ever experienced. He turned toward me. Ive been 
using level twenty-one for several years now, so dont worry about me.
Oh, how I loved being a teenager! It was for moments like these that all the 
angst and frustrations and uncertainties were worthwhile. As an adult, I could 
never enjoy a moment like this. I laughed.
Level thirty-five, huh? I laughed again and saw a flash of worry cross 
Resslers face. I still considered him a friend, but it was nice to see I could 
make him cautious. It made his TAU connection more bearable. If youre only 
prepared for Level thirty-five, Doctor, then I recommend you dont move around 
until the shielding is in place. I grinned and kept looking at him.
Total access.
Mike must have been on a constant, aggressive watch, because he responded 
immediately and with flair. Instead of the room fading away into the puterverse, 
it exploded. A white ball of flame leaped from my middle and melted everything 
in sight. What few slivers of reality remained were ground into bits of yellow 
data and left as glowing embers on the clear floor. Overhead the sky was a 
brilliant emerald green, with gold and orange spires shooting up toward them. In 
the distance I could make out the banks of the Quantum river. I felt the 
exhilaration of the puterverse hit me like a meteor and fill me with its energy. 
I raised my arms over my head, twirling and laughing.
Halfway through my spin, I saw Jody and Ressler on the ground. Blood was pouring 
freely from their ears, nose and mouth, quickly choking them. Abigail, you 
idiot!
Mike! I need a couple of boxes for my guests. Hurry!
You got it, Abby! There was a crackling of whips along with a tinkling sound 
and I saw flat planes of sparkles surround them then begin forming around each 
one. They were safe now, although it would take a couple more minutes to 
recover.
Man o man! Am I glad to see you, Abby!
Yeah, well thats nice. I notice your manners arent improved, though. Get your 
butt down here and let me hug you!
The emerald sky changed to black as the color collapsed into a ball of green 
flame, which in turn plummeted toward us. It exploded over my head and washed 
through me, lingering. I felt a moment of panic, remembering my recent 
experiences in Glendale. But I pushed it down. I wasnt going to let past abuses 
control me.
You jerk! I shouted, only half-angry. Im not some kind of easy hussy. Hands 
off! I tightened my body and threw him clear. He laughed and formed himself in 
front of me, his bright green eyes playful and happy.
Well, how long do expect me to go without copping a feel?
I expect you to go your entire life without copping a feel, you pervert. Got 
it?
Yeah, yeah. I know you like it. He went over to Ressler and bent over, putting 
his hands on his knees. So who are your friends? Not too tough, are they?
Ressler was slowly getting to his feet. Jody needed help, so I touched her and 
charged the field a little extra. She moaned and looked around.
Where are we? She coughed and wiped some blood away. Is this level 
thirty-five?
Mike laughed his nasty laugh. Level thirty-five? Whats that supposed to mean? 
Look, lady
Who are you? Why do you look like that?
Careful, Jody. You dont want to get Mike upset, I offered helpfully. Here, 
let me help you up. If you start getting sick or woozy, just reach out and touch 
me. You too, Doctor. My aura will perk you up some. Dont go to the well too 
often, though, I cautioned. My signature is pure UTC, so youll pay for it 
when we leave the puterverse. Which gives me a thought. I changed my tone. 
Mike, Id like you to give Sergeant Jody Eyer, 179th Regiment, the day off 
tomorrow. While youre at it, verify the credentials of our other guest. He 
claims to be Major Scott Ressler with the TAU Intelligence Arm.
Mike bowed at the waist. Yours to command, milady. Hold still, Major.
Why? What do you aaahhh! Ressler jumped back as Mike passed through him, 
sparks flying as he penetrated the shielding. Ressler started scratching himself 
furiously, then stopped as the ground beneath him turned emerald green and began 
bubbling. Mike erupted from the roiling surface and came over to me.
Okay, thats the first part. Next, playtime with TAUs systems. I really hope, 
he added wistfully, that theyve fixed some of their holes. Its no fun 
breaking in anymore. Back in a jiffy. His legs exploded into a jet and he shot 
up into the sky, disappearing almost instantly.
Wait! Doctor Ressler called after him, still scratching his arms and neck. He 
looked stunned and lost. I liked him better this way.
Yes, Doctor?
Dont I need to go with him to provide my access codes and serial numbers?
Why?
If he doesnt have them, he wont be able to enter TAU security, let alone 
verify
I dont think that will be a problem. Mike doesnt have a whole lot of respect 
for security systems. I liked the implied offer, though. It made me a little 
more trusting of Doctor Ressler. TAU has one of the best, second only to 
NATech. All that means for Mike is that its just that much more fun, but not 
challenging. Come on. While were waiting we may as well head over to the 
Quantum. Im sure our conversations going to take us there anyway. I opened my 
arms up and out.
Abigail! Jody spoke sharply, causing me to stumble.
What? Is something wrong? Is the shielding a little weak? I could--
No, the shieldings fine. Its you. She was staring at me. Look at you! 
Thats not the figure you have in the real world, she said accusingly.
Umm. I felt myself flush, causing my yellowish light to tinge gold. Id 
forgotten about that. Shortly after coming into my own in the puterverse, Id 
started adopting a more womanly figure. Okay, I was vain. But it reflected how I 
felt about myself when I was in here. Still, it was a little embarrassing. More 
so, now that I noticed Doctor Ressler staring at me. Well, not staring. It was a 
good long look though.
I--I--I kinda like this form, Jody. I suppose its part of me wanting to grow 
up. Some of its because I feel older in here, more in control of myself.
It probably is closer to what you were like in your first body, too. Ressler 
offered, feeling my discomfort.
Yes, that, too. I was thirty-one when I was first riped.
Id also guess a small part of it is to fluster Mike, Jody said with a smirk. 
I know Id like to get his goat.
I laughed. You know, Jody, Id never thought of that. But youre right. My 
figure does ruffle Mikes ego a bit. He has true feelings, you know. At their 
surprise, I smiled. Well talk about that at the river. Come on.
I opened my arms and let my wings appear. They erupted along my arms, feathered 
and shimmering. They tapered off toward my ankles. I bounced up on my toes, and 
the electron breeze snatched my wings, lifting me. About ten meters up, I looked 
back down. Jody and Ressler were staring up at me.
Come on. The rivers this way. I started gliding slowly along, letting my two 
grounded friends keep up. Jody called up to me.
So what level is this really, Abigail?
Ask the good doctor, Jody. Maybe he knows. I laughed at his sour look.
Okay, Abigail, I admit it. We had no idea you were this high up, he said 
honestly. Frankly, I havent a clue what level were on. The theoretical limit 
is sixty-four. So this is, what--forty-five? Fifty?
Im glad Mike isnt around to hear that, Doctor. Hed really get ticked off. I 
dont operate at any level. Neither does Mike. I have unrestricted access to 
absolutely everything in puterverse. By the way, the real limit for non UTC is 
sixty-seven, not sixty-four.
A frown came on his face. That cant be right. Why sixty-seven, Abigail?
Because sixty-seven is a prime number, silly. I smiled at his confused look, 
but not too much. Id been pretty muddy about the unique and powerful 
characteristics of prime numbers too, until I understood trinary code. Then it 
was easy.
Who is Mike, Abigail? Jody asked. She was jogging easily along, leading 
Ressler, who seemed to be struggling a little more. He still had energy enough 
to answer, though.
As far as we know, Jody, Mike is a program written in Unbound Trinary Code by 
Abigail. He turned his face back up to me. No level at all, Abigail?
None, Doctor. As the writer said, This is my world and welcome to it.
Unbound Trinary Code? Theres no such thing. Jodys face was a little flush. 
The UTC boost lasted for awhile, then wore off quickly. I swooped down and 
brushed her with my wings. Her pace picked up immediately and she began to 
breathe easier.
Sure there is, Jody, I answered, climbing a little higher. Its just that no 
one knows how to visualize it yet.
No one except you, Abigail, Ressler countered.
Almost true. Mike knows how to use it, too. And Kiki, only I didnt say so. 
Thinking of Kiki, I had a notion. I looked up ahead of us. I see were almost 
to the river. Im going to go up first and wait for Mike. Bye.
I accelerated quickly. Mike was faster and flashier, but I was no slouch. I 
arrived at the river in two seconds and landed in three at the base of an orange 
spire that sat next to the riverbank. Jody and Ressler were about a kilometer 
behind me. I threw up a doppelganger of me waiting for them and jumped back up 
into the air, using a cloak. I aimed for the peak of the spire about two 
kilometers up. At the top was a small platform, which I landed on. Far below me 
I could see two little spots working their way toward our meeting place. They 
were going a little too fast. I thought about it a moment and softened the 
ground while warping their path. They slowed down and began weaving back and 
forth. From their viewpoint, nothing had changed. I now had about five minutes, 
which was plenty. And all I wanted to take. Staying up this high from interface 
surface kept me from prying eyes and ears, but the energy drain took a toll.
Kiki! I called out.
From the middle of the small landing a crystal flower poked up. The leaves, a 
clear light green, opened and the blossom appeared. The petals opened and Kiki 
was inside. Instead of jumping to her feet, though, she stayed on her knees, her 
whole body quivering.
Whats wrong, little sister? I said with a worried voice.
Abby, Im so sorry! Please forgive me! I should have been more careful! I 
didnt mean to--
Slow down, Kiki. The microsats, right? She didnt say anything but kept 
sobbing. Its not your fault, Kiki. Understand?
But I killed them, Abigail! She began wailing. I stooped down and picked her 
up, cupping her tiny form in my hands. Her blue glow flowed in with my yellow, 
turning my arm an emerald green, the same shade as Mike.
No, you didnt, sweetie, they were already dead. NATech killed them. You 
punished NATech, under my orders. I would never tell her that had I not been 
knocked unconscious and taken, I might have called off the attack. The 
responsibility was mine. Remember, thats my world, not yours. Out there, you 
have to trust me, right?
She sniffed and nodded.
All right then, trust me on this. It wasnt your fault. You did exactly as I 
told you. I wish it could have been different. I felt a tugging at my heart, 
but still didnt cry. Susie told me once that I did stupid and reckless and 
dangerous things. She also said that one day it would be necessary that I do one 
of those stupid and reckless and dangerous things. I stroked my finger down her 
back, then used the tip to lift her chin. When I called for that microsat 
attack, that day had come. Please dont blame yourself for something I did.
She felt better after that and I was glad Id taken the time to visit. I didnt 
know when Id see her again, so I needed to resolve this now. She smiled at me 
and her blue gleam brightened and lightened. I smiled back at her.
Thats my Kiki! Sorry to put this on you so fast, sister, but my guests are 
almost at our meeting place and I have to get back down there. I dont know when 
Ill have access again, so I need you to do a few things for me. I told her 
what I wanted and she became very happy. Kikis emotions were not as stable as 
Mikes. Not because my code was flawed but because I wanted someone I could talk 
to about how I felt. Emotionally, Kiki and I were twins.
Wow! Thisll take me a least a week, Abby! Thanks for the challenge. She 
jumped lightly from my hand and floated to her petal. As her foot touched, a 
small terminal sprouted from the blossom and activated. I saw her touch her face 
and when she turned back to me, I laughed out loud, then coughed in the thin 
electron air.
Why in the world are you wearing those? She had on a pair of round, black 
spectacles. I could even see the sheen of the lenses.
Do you like them? she asked eagerly. I discovered them while browsing through 
twentieth century archives. I think they make me look very sophisticated. Do you 
think Mike will like them?
Im sure hell be speechless when he sees them. For Mike, thats a good thing. 
I like them. I looked back down. Jody and Ressler were almost at my 
doppelganger. Look, I gotta go. When you finish up your projects, send me a 
message through Jodys access. Shell pass it along. I jumped off the landing. 
Take care, Kiki!
Gbye, Abby! I heard her shout.
I let myself plummet toward the ground. Halfway down, I told my doppelganger to 
get aloft. It shot up toward me, meeting me about three hundred meters from the 
surface. It disappeared and I was left with a pair of wings. To those below, 
there would have been only one me, since I decloaked as the doppelganger 
disappeared. I finished my now controlled fall, breaking and landing lightly in 
front of Jody. My wings folded back under my arms and disappeared. She clapped 
her hands.
That was fantastic! She sounded like a little girl, overflowing with 
excitement. Even Ressler was smiling with his friendly smile now.
Fantastic barely describes it. I never thought it was possible to have that 
kind of mobility in the puterverse, Abigail. Doesnt the interface affect you at 
all?
Maybe. Im not going to give away too much until I know who you are, Doctor.
And if Im not who I say I am? he prodded gently.
We had a phrase for it centuries ago. It was called dead man walking.
His face went stiff for a moment, then relaxed. He smiled weakly.
Makes me glad I am with TAU, then. He strolled over to the data bank and sat 
down on the short purple grass. Jody and I joined him. My heart jumped when Jody 
sat closer to me than Ressler. It gave me comfort to know she seemed to prefer 
my company to his. Silly competition for friends, I know. But I really needed a 
friend now.
The silver and gold of data currents, eddies and streams in the river, swirled 
only an arms length away. For as far as we could see out, it was like that. 
Although this wasnt as nice as my favorite place, it was very pleasant. 
Occasionally, a sliver of light would erupt briefly from the river as someone in 
our relative vicinity would access. There were more flashes in the middle of the 
stream than on our shore. There was no access on the far bank, which was only 
half seen through the faint ion fog that floated just above the surface of the 
river. Jody saw my distant gaze and pointed to the far bank.
Have you ever been over there, Abigail?
No.
Can you go over there?
I hesitated. I was sure by now that Ressler was who he claimed to be. Mike would 
have successfully acquired his records by now and verified his identity. If 
Ressler hadnt checked out, the shielding around him would have disappeared and 
hed be exposed to the full elements of unlimited access, which was a one-way 
trip. But just because he was TAU didnt mean I was going to pour out my plans 
to him. Not that I didnt trust him. But by not telling him anything, I didnt 
have to trust him.
Still, I should give some kind of answer. If I was too secretive Id never get 
access while at the 179th. Worse, TAU, who had been passively supporting my 
efforts in the puterverse, might get tougher if I didnt cooperate at some 
level. It wasnt yet time to give everything away, I decided. It was, however, 
time to start letting the Resistance in on my ideas.
Yes, I can go over there, Jody. I havent tried yet, but Im sure I can.
Why havent you? Ressler inquired, scooting closer to us.
Because of what I think is over there, Doctor. I took a breath and plunged in. 
I think that there is a hostile being over there that is forcing restrictions 
on the entire puterverse and has actively retarded the development of Earths 
society for at least three centuries.
Had I turned into a giant tree sloth and started singing the Star Spangled 
Banner they wouldnt have been more shocked. Jody especially, Ressler not as 
much This might have been another one of those times kids like me enjoy, but the 
subject was far too serious to appreciate the moment. They both started to say 
something at once, but Jody won out.
Thats impossible, Abigail! she exclaimed. A person whos been alive for 
three centuries and has enough power to dictate the direction of an entire 
planet? Do you know how incredible that sounds?
Of course she does, Sergeant, Ressler said thoughtfully. It sounds just as 
incredible as a sixteen year old girl who has unlimited access to the puterverse 
and can create a living being out of impossible code.
But three hundred years! Jody protested. Medicine has never been able to 
extend life beyond one hundred and twenty years on Earth, let alone three 
hundred.
I didnt say three hundred years, Jody, I explained. I said at least three 
hundred. And I didnt say that it was a human doing this.
We heard a roaring sound and Mike streaked into view. He was skimming along the 
softly undulating hills leading to the bank. About a half kilometer from us, he 
plunged into the ground, splashing green for a hundred meter radius all around 
him. Moments later, he surfaced again, next to me. He didnt say anything, 
instead just lay back onto the grass beside me. He gave a brief nod and started 
contemplating the sky.
The doctor and Jody had lapsed into stunned silence. I lay back on the grass and 
looked up into the black, starless sky of the puterverse.
The best place to start is at the beginning. But I havent found a beginning 
yet. Not for whats on the other side. So youll have to bear with me while I 
start at my beginning, two years ago, and work in both directions.
As you both know, I was born in the late twentieth century and lived for 
thirty-one years in my original body. At the time of my death, I was working 
for a sensitive laboratory and think tank that tried to anticipate upcoming 
problems and find solutions for them. That was close enough to the truth for my 
purposes. Because of that, when I was accidentally electrocuted through faulty 
security systems, I was in about the only place that could possibly work out a 
solution to save me. It was this agency that created, I believe, the original 
persona transference that eventually became known as riping. The next few 
centuries are--
A moment, please, Doctor Ressler broke in, Im somewhat familiar with history 
of that period. I was aware of the United States role in the development of the 
riping process. But it had always been recorded that riping techniques werent 
introduced until the twenty-second century.
As I said, what they came up with eventually evolved into riping. And not all 
of our technologies were made available for public consumption. Anyway, I have 
no memories of my other personas, and I dont recall anything until waking up in 
Dr. Barretts sickbay on November 11, 2676. Although I have had occasion to 
experience a few of my ripes, Ill not go into detail now about them.
Waking up as I did was a big change. It took weeks for the shock to wear off 
fully and for my mind to come to grips with the many differences Id woken up 
to. After I had made--
Sorry, Abigail, Jody said apologetically. Dont mean to interrupt, but what 
changes are you talking about? I mean, I know you went from being a 
thirty-one-year-old to a fourteen-year-old, but how hard was it really?
Oops. Id almost slipped. Jody was assuming Id always been female, an 
assumption Id been cultivating. Fortunately, she hadnt had any experience with 
Cues, so I knew I could worm out of my apparent overstatement.
Its not just having seventeen years shaved off, Jody. I had to go through the 
same changes again, but with a different body. Not to mention the big time leap 
and change of scenery. In a minutes time--to me--Id gone from a mature adult 
working with the government to a semi-helpless twerp tied up with rebels. Its a 
little more intense a change than, say, going to sleep in your bed and waking up 
on the floor. It takes time.
But I had the time and adjusted. Corporal Lendler and Lieutenant Sanchez 
noticed my ease in the puterverse fairly quickly and I was given access 
immediately. It was during our first tour together in the puterverse that they 
showed me the Quantum river and the invisible far shore. They were curious about 
me and my past and even then asked what you did just now, Jody. Could I cross?
I wondered about their question. Why was it so important to cross? Had anyone 
ever crossed? Did they know what was over there, and just wanted to see if I 
knew?
Why you, Abigail?
I looked at Ressler, but his blurred puterverse face didnt betray very much. I 
shrugged mentally and committed.
Because Chris Young, the creator of the puterverses webbing techniques, had 
lived at the same time I did. The truth is, he and I worked for the same company 
and I knew him quite well.
Romantically? Ressler inquired.
Uh, no, Doctor. Professionally. Then he didnt know my full story. I had 
worried that TAU had informed him of my original sex. His question showed they 
obviously had not.
They hoped that I, knowing Chris, knew his techniques to cross the river. It 
was an unfounded hope. Chris had developed the webbing, but this kind of 
advancement didnt take place until long after hed died. Sure, knowing him and 
his style, it was a lot easier for me to get the hang of the place, but other 
than that, I had no special insights.
Then you didnt get your trinary coding skill from your original persona? 
Ressler seemed surprised.
Excuse me, Doctor, but I am me. What you mean to say is my original lifetime.
My apologies.
Thats okay. No, I didnt get them from the twenty-first century. The fact is I 
dont know where I got them. I do know that I need to be careful that whatever 
is over there doesnt find out I have UTC knowledge. I dont want to put too 
much importance on myself, but the being over there probably doesnt know UTC, 
and would consider me a major threat if it discovered me. Fortunately, I have 
both NATech and the Resistance to work behind.
NATech is in on this? Jody whistled. In the puterverse, it sounded like a 
kazoo. That makes sense. Theyre in on everything. Then theyre the ones 
working with that thing?
Yes and no. They have a common goal--suppression of Earths social and 
technical development. But the motives are different. NATech is looking for a 
captive consumer market for achieving profit. A stupid goal in my opinion. I 
dont know what the other beings motive is, but its nothing so trite as a 
handful of cash.
Getting back to my story. I spent the first few months with the Third figuring 
out the puterverse and getting used to my new body. To make matters worse for 
the former, I still hadnt realized my coding ability. At first, I had no idea 
of the scope of the puterverse. And with severely restricted access, it was a 
frustrating maze of walls and red doors. Still, I picked up the feel and flavor 
fairly quickly.
The big break came after my first sharding episode. I was out of it for three 
weeks. I dont remember anything during that time. When the episode finally did 
end, I was a basket case for another week. Eventually, I was bored just lying 
around in bed and I accessed to do a little light netting. But it was so 
different. Where there had been massive black walls, they now looked fragile. I 
pushed against one, just to test it, and it crumbled to ion dust, giving me 
complete access to everything behind it. I had the ability to visualize and use 
unbound trinary code.
Fascinating. Did you or Dr. Barrett ever determine whether your talent was 
triggered by the episode, a remnant from a previous shard, or a catalyst that 
activated a latent ability?
No, Doctor, we never could determine it, though not for lack of trying. I was 
ready for active duty after another week, but I stayed in sickbay for an 
additional week. I was as eager to find out how this came about, and how long it 
would last. Dr. Barrett didnt find anything. Not a hint, not a clue, not even a 
trace of how this had come about. The only thing we could determine was that it 
was permanent. And even that is hard to explain. If I could teach you UTC, youd 
know that once you have the concept of UTC, it becomes a part of you.
We eventually gave it up and I returned to active duty, transferring out of 
support and moving over to Research. Now that I had the keys to the kingdom, as 
it were, I really started to poke my nose into all the corners of the 
puterverse. I could go everywhere, so I did. Everywhere but across the Quantum.
One of the biggest perks of accessing with UTC is theres no toll on my 
physical body. The primary reason for access levels is security--or at least 
thats what were led to think. Another major reason is that the higher the 
level, the greater the toll on the users real body. Accessing too high can 
literally suck the life out of you. But UTC freed me of that, so I was able to 
shed access level restrictions.
I had been staring out over the Quantum while talking, so I snuck a quick peek 
at my audience. Jody was staring up into the sky and Ressler was staring at me. 
I saw his eyes avert abruptly and I had a vague feeling. Intuition? I dont 
know. I returned to my story, but I was suddenly certain somehow that while Jody 
was hearing for the first time, Doctor Ressler had heard it all before.
But the puterverse was too big. I had gotten very fast moving around, and 
became even faster after I fashioned my wings, but there was too much to see. I 
needed help. Thats when I decided to write Mike, here. I nudged him playfully 
with my foot. Sparks jumped up and floated away, several fizzling out in the 
data river. He smiled at me, making me feel warm. Mike had heard this many times 
over, but always enjoyed the telling.
Writing him was one of the most difficult things Id ever done. Oh, the coding 
was pretty easy. After all, in the physical world, hes just a bunch of zeros, 
ones and twos. Ouch! Mike jabbed me in the ribs, so I slugged him. Hey, its 
true! Lemme alone, jerk.
Why in the world did you write him to behave like that, Abigail? Jody asked, 
looking at Mike with something between amusement and distaste.
Hey, lady, dont ever talk to me like Im a program or something!
Why not? Jody challenged. Thats all you are.
Thats all I am? Ha! Not even close! How bout I drop your shields and well--
Knock it off, both of you. Mikes right, Jody. Hes much more than a program. 
Hes the code he started as in the same way that were the infants we started 
as. In fact, thats not an analogy, thats hard fact. As the time has passed 
here in the puterverse, Mikes code has matured quickly. It will even reach a 
point when hell stop being rude to my friends and quit making passes at me. 
Soon, I hope. Mike sulked, but didnt explode--figuratively or literally--so I 
continued.
And I didnt program his personality, that developed on its own, with me acting 
as a kind of--
Sweetheart.
--big sister. Mikes the little brother I always wanted to kill. But instead of 
taking it out on him, weve been working together past eighteen months, laying 
out our own--umm--strategy for countering both NATech and whatevers on the far 
side of the Quantum. I should be ready to cross in about four more months. By 
then the safeguards will be in place. Im very interested in seeing what could 
be so important to a creature that it would try to corrupt and ruin an entire 
planets society.
No less interested than we are, Abigail, Ressler said, nodding as though 
approving that I hadnt lied. As for what TAUs been doing during that time, 
Jody, weve been monitoring all of Abigails activities for over two years. At 
least we thought wed been monitoring them. Its pretty obvious now that weve 
only been seeing what shes wanted us to see. A humbling revelation.
Sorry, Doctor, I said, smiling a little. Both TAU and the Resistance have 
been very accommodating in helping me with resources and access. But I couldnt 
risk revealing too much. I still cant. I dont have the fear of NATech that the 
179th does, but that doesnt mean I dont respect their power and influence.
I looked at Jody. Speaking of the 179th, youve heard my story. Now you tell me 
yours. Whats with all this cloak and dagger? The 179th doesnt strike me as the 
kind of unit that NATech would worry too much about, let alone infiltrate.
Theres a reason, Jody said glumly.
More to the point, that is the reason, Ressler said cryptically. The regiment 
is ineffective because NATech wishes it to be ineffective. He stood up and 
absentmindedly brushed off his legs. Why dont we continue this conversation 
outside? Im feeling a little disoriented and I dont want to be too sore in the 
morning. He looked back toward the way we had come. And we still have a ways 
to go before we can safely end access.
I stood up as well, helping Jody to her feet. She was probably in better 
physical shape than either the Doctor or I, but she didnt have the experience 
in the puterverse that we did. She was looking a little ragged around the edges, 
literally. Her virtual form had started showing small tears near her hands and 
feet, and the color was fading. She was in no danger, not as long as the shields 
were up, but there was no point in overstaying ones welcome.
Good idea, Doctor. I could charge up both of you quick enough with another shot 
of UTC, but were pretty much finished here. What you have to tell me can be 
said in the flesh, and Mike can check it easily enough. Even better, we can end 
access right now. Since this entire area is mine, one point of exit is as good 
as another. Before we do, though, Id like a quick minute with Mike.
Fine, said Dr. Ressler, although it didnt look very fine with him. Well 
wait outside
If its all the same, Doctor, Id like you and Jody to wait here. Ill only be 
a minute and besides, those shields wont allow you to exit anyway. I bit my 
tongue as I said it. I had to constantly remind myself to never volunteer 
information. Grow up, Abigail.
All right, he agreed, which was not too necessary seeing as he had no control 
over the decision.
Thanks. I lifted my arms up, and the shielding around Jody and Ressler fell 
away, joining together and forming a sound-proof box. They could move around and 
talk to each other, but they couldnt hear me. I turned my back to them and 
faced Mike. He had come to his feet and was looking at me intently, his emerald 
eyes bright.
You dont trust him, do you, Abby?
Sure I do, Mike. I trust him to tell TAU absolutely everything he learned from 
me tonight. I only hope it wasnt too much.
Mike shook his head. I dont think you did. I ran the entire conversation and 
movements through logistical semantics and theres a less than one percent 
chance that the good doctor picked up anything in addition to what you intended, 
and a ten percent chance he didnt get everything. He considered a moment. 
Though that number maybe a little high. Hes a pretty smart cookie for a flesh. 
No offense intended.
Liar, I said bluntly. All right. So we got our message across. Now can you 
tap into our conversation and follow what he has to say? He started to look 
indignant, so I raised my hands and laughed. Hey, no offense.
Liar.
Yeah, yeah. Well, I gotta go, Mike. Ill try to get back to you in the next 
couple of days. You take care of yourself, pervert. Oh! Ive got Kiki working on 
some UTC routines for me, so leave her alone. I turned to leave, but Mike 
grabbed my hand.
Hey, beautiful. His voice was so quiet, I snapped my head around to him. He 
suddenly sounded so mature and concerned. You make sure you come back sooner 
than later, all right? I cant watch over you out there, and it it bugs me 
that I cant protect you.
I put a hand along his cheek and kissed him, spreading yellow along his green 
skin where my lips touched. Youre so sweet. Ill be careful. Another few 
months and well have time for a real adventure. Bye.
Bye.
I turned back to Ressler and Jody and stepped into the box. There was a rumbling 
sound and the dense cybersky turned into a heavy black cloud that poured down 
onto us. Just as the first fringes touched us, ending our access, I looked back 
at Mike. He was still standing there, arms straight by his side with a light 
blue flicker emanating from his chest. With surprise, I realized this was the 
first time Id ever seen him scared.


Chapter Four
It was nearly two in the morning when I crawled back under my covers. The bed 
creaked a little, as though disapproving of my late night rendezvous. I rolled 
onto my back and stared into the emptiness above me. I was exhausted.
And worried. After exiting the puterverse two hours ago, we carried on our 
conversation, this time focusing on Jody and Resslers problems. I had expected 
to find out that I would continue to encounter difficulty with the command 
structure of the 179th regiment and I was right. I had also expected to learn 
that ultimately it would have little to do with my overall plan to cross the 
Quantum River and face what was there. I was wrong. Or at least, I thought I 
was. The uncertainty more than anything worried me.
The 179th Regiment was a mess. And the problem wasnt just a commander who was a 
clueless ass and a surly A Company with an overblown opinion of itself. Ressler 
was convinced that NATech had been actively trying to disable the regiment. This 
pleasant bit of news had come while he was still treating Jody and himself for 
the effects of their rough ride with me in the puterverse.
* * * *
Here, Sergeant, drink up. Jody took the cup from Ressler and drank up. The 
clear pink liquid gave off a pleasant fragrance that made me think of early 
morning. She stopped about halfway and began coughing. This was her third 
episode and like the other two, the violence of her coughing gave her a bloody 
nose.
I am so sorry, Jody! Guilt mixed with worry gave me an awful feeling. I had 
no idea that UTC would have this effect on the two of you. Like Jody, Doctor 
Ressler had had several fits of twitching, coughing and bleeding. He had treated 
himself first to better give treatment to Jody, and his side effects had faded 
significantly, though his right arm and head still jerked on occasion. Jody 
continued drinking the pink liquid while the doctor sat by her as I sat on her 
left.
Its not your fault, Abigail, Ressler assured me for the tenth time. We 
brought you into our little spy story, and you were perfectly right in verifying 
my identity. I wouldnt have approved your trip unless I accompanied you, and 
you wouldnt have helped us without going. Besides, he smiled thinly, what I 
saw makes how I feel all worthwhile. He laughed and stretched with a groan. 
And I feel awful.
Me, too. And me, too. Jody handed back the empty cup to Ressler and also 
smiled thinly. I feel like a hov is parked on top of me and Im still glad I 
went. I had never in my wildest dreams imagined how beautiful the puterverse 
was. Nor how alive. She looked at me with wonder. Im surprised you dont just 
step in there and never come out. Accessing doesnt bother you in the slightest, 
and its a lot nicer world in there than it is out here. And safer, too, with 
the kind of power you have, Abigail.
The temptation pops up from time to time, I admitted. But even though Ive 
never been affected by access, I still need to eat, drink, sleep, I gave a 
short giggle, and use the bathroom. Besides, while the puterverse is exciting, 
its only partly real. Resslers eyebrows raised slightly and I hurried on. 
Partly real in the sense that we are at least mentally present in it. Its out 
here thats real.
And as for safety, well, that can also change. Ive told you how in there. Now 
you tell me how out here.
Jody and Ressler exchanged quick looks. Ressler nodded and Jody began.
Ive been attached to the 179th as B Company sergeant for just over five 
months. I had transferred over from the Thirty-fifth, rather suddenly. My 
commanding officer had said it was a golden opportunity to move up. It was, too, 
on screen. Id been heading up a half-strength Company D for a year, and 
prospects werent good. So I took it as an atta-girl commendation and went.
It started off for me about the same as it did for you, Abigail. Fortunately, I 
arrived healthy and with the proper papers, so the Lieutenant didnt give me the 
grilling he gave you, Abigail. But he wasnt happy either, which seemed odd 
because all along I was coming here to lead Company B. It wasnt until Id been 
here for a very miserable three weeks that I discovered it was the doctor here 
who had arranged my transfer.
I looked over at Ressler, expectantly.
Ive been here about six months, arriving shortly before Sergeant Eyer. TAU had 
been suspicious of this unit for two years, and we felt it was time
Suspicious in what way? I inquired.
Nothing that we could point to at first. Failed missions, canceled missions, 
barely achieved objectives. As you know, every unit has its moments when nothing 
seems to go right. But the 179th hadnt had anything go right in twenty-eight 
months. Nothing catastrophic, but nothing good either.
Then seven months ago, the regiment was ordered to make an attack on a convoy 
that was supplying the Douala garrison on the coast. TAU was certain that in 
addition to supplies they were transporting prisoners from the failed raid on 
Tripoli. We very much wanted our people back. I nodded in understanding. I 
remembered that raid. We wanted to take part in it, but had been tied up 
knocking out the Hong Kong microsat launch facility. And the rescue effort was 
very believable; the Resistance always used every means at their disposal to 
rescue captured dogs. It was a matter of pride. TAU fully supported these 
actions, partly because they had no choice and mainly because they had all been 
dogs themselves once.
The attack point was missed by Posens force. Faulty equipment we were told. 
Since the transports NATech was using had been damaged in the fighting in 
Tripoli, they were restricted to surface travel only. Ours werent, so a second 
attack point was scheduled. They missed that one, too, arriving thirty minutes 
late.
In all, four separate attack plans were implemented over the two days it took 
the convoy to travel from Tripoli to Douala. Lieutenant Posen was unable to make 
any of them. By this time, TAU wanted to relieve him of command.
Then, unexpectedly, came news of a fifth attack, one implemented by Posen 
himself, literally underneath the sonic cannons of the Douala garrison. The 
179th put up a good fight and Posen showed a flash of brilliance in its 
execution. They had attacked too close for the cannon to be used--one shot and 
not only would the 179th be wiped out, the garrison shields would have been 
ruined and the foundations badly ruptured. Posen took a calculated risk. He 
reasoned that NATech would be willing to ruin their defenses temporarily in 
exchange for destroying one of our regiments, so he kept his B Company back in 
reserve, out of range of sonics, but in sight of the garrison. If NATech 
breached their shields to destroy A Company, B Company would swarm in. The 
garrison has heavy guns on the outside, but is believed to be poorly protected 
inside. They didnt fire, so apparently were right. Then, as an escape route, 
he took a path along the shielding perimeter, accelerating to full speed. Once 
he had done that, he simply scattered his force out across the desert, giving 
the guns nothing but fast moving targets that quickly sped out of range.
So the attack was successful. The convoy was badly mauled, and some supplies 
were taken. TAU was almost ready to forgive and forget.
And the prisoners? I asked quietly, captivated by Resslers story.
Yes. The prisoners. Thats why I said almost. Unknown to Lieutenant Posen, TAU 
had acquired a manifest of the convoy prior to its departure. Included in the 
shipments was four tons of frozen nitrogen, destined for the Douala backup data 
core. Following standard NATech procedure, that hov traveled at the front of the 
convoy. The prisoners were being transported in vehicles located in the middle 
of the convoy. None were rescued, none were killed. And today that nitrogen is 
being used by the data core in this facility. Posen never reported the 
nitrogen.
He paused to let that soak in. It didnt take long. The only way that Posen 
could pull off a raid underneath the garrison defenses would be to hit the rear 
of the convoy, then work his way to the front. To reach the frozen nitrogen, 
hed have to first reach the prisoners. If there had been stiff resistance by 
NATech, it was just possible that hed be forced to abort the rescue. But that 
would also mean hed be unable to advance further to capture the nitrogen. Not 
only would he have an unwieldy vehicle to turn around, hed also have to fight 
his way back through the same firefight that had supposedly prevented him from 
rescuing the prisoners in the first place.
Resslers comment on there being no prisoner fatalities was not wasted on me, 
either. Intense fighting is the norm during NATech/Resistance battles. The only 
thing in the minds of the soldiers on both sides is a numbing desperation and 
mad fury to kill everything in sight as quickly as possible. Mercifully, such 
battles were of a small scale and very brief, some lasting only two or three 
minutes. Sadly, any unarmed personnel caught in the middle, such as prisoners, 
were helpless laser fodder. Riding in thinly shielded prisoner transports, and 
dressed only in fatigues and without armor, this group suffered the greatest 
number of casualties. That there were no prisoners killed in the fight meant 
that the fight had taken place elsewhere.
So Lieutenant Posen had never intended to rescue the prisoners, I voiced my 
conclusion in disbelief.
Lieutenant Posen never intended to rescue the prisoners, Jody repeated, barely 
keeping her emotion in check. That little jerk with his shiny boots only wanted 
the godammed nitrogen! And he got it, too, with--
Thats enough, Sergeant, Ressler broke in with a firm voice.
She broke off and stared at him a moment, then nodded and sat back down.
But as bad as this raid was, it doesnt sound like it would merit a covert and 
long-term investigation. From what youve told me, I prompted quietly.
No, it didnt. As youve probably guessed from the details of the fight, TAU 
had already started looking into the 179th Nothing out of the ordinary, really. 
Whenever a unit shows signs of losing its edge, we try to rotate personnel in 
with the recruits. He said it as though spying on your own people was the most 
natural thing in the world. Our person in the 179th was only looking for 
irregularities and inefficiencies that could be addressed through normal 
channels. We didnt expect anything criminal.
What we got was totally unexpected. The convoy carried a fighting compliment of 
ninety Company A musters 148, with 145 effectives on the day of the raid. The 
fighting, as reported by our agent, who was in B Company, was intense, lasting 
nearly four minutes. And although the escape route was well chosen, the sonic 
guns should have scored at least two hits, especially on the slower nitrogen 
transport. To be blunt: Despite the excellent execution of the raid, there 
should have been some casualties. There were exactly three. Through careful 
monitoring of the Douala transmissions and using other, classified, means, TAU 
was able to estimate NATech casualties at five.
* * * *
I heard a creaking from a bunk to my right and turned my head. In the dim light, 
I could see it was the athletic blond woman who had smiled at me earlier today. 
She was getting up to undoubtedly make a midnight trip to the ladies room. I was 
tempted to whisper to her as she passed, just to say hi, but didnt. I was too 
tired. Instead, I turned over to stare at the wall, hoping it would help me 
think better than staring at the ceiling.
* * * *
After the raid, Ressler continued, TAU had all they needed to open up a 
covert investigation. Clearly, Posen and NATech were in cahoots. Whether it was 
the Douala garrison taking advantage of a weak Resistance officer or if it was 
an official NATech operation working with a traitor remained to be discovered. 
This kind of investigation was beyond the scope of TAUs inside man, so I was 
introduced. One of the casualties had been the regimental doctor, so he was 
transferred out to recover from his wounds and I was transferred in.
Ressler stood up and refilled his and Jodys cup with the clear pink liquid. A 
kind of quick-acting nutrient, the fluid greatly diminished the effects of 
puterverse travel. Jody took it gratefully and sipped it. Again I smelled a 
morning freshness fill the sickbay Ressler took a swallow out of his cup and 
continued.
Within days of arriving, it became obvious that A Company was as rotten as 
Posen. They had to be, or there would have been a lot more NATech casualties 
during the fight. I needed help, but B Company was useless. In order to keep 
full control over the 179th, yet still allow for the normal movement of 
personnel in and out of the unit to allay TAU suspicions, Posen kept B Company 
undertrained but honest.
Seeing that B Company was clean but weak, I requested TAU to send me a solid 
replacement sergeant. Since Posen had an aversion to women serving in his unit, 
I made an unusual condition and specifically asked for a female non-com. Three 
days later--
An aversion to women? I interrupted. Isnt that a bit strong? Ill admit that 
Ive noticed some tension here, but ow! Jody smacked me on the back of the 
head.
Geez, you really are a teenager, arent you? Dont interrupt all the time. The 
docs right, Abigail. Hadnt you noticed that A Company is a boys only club?
I hadnt noticed. It had never occurred to me to notice. Sexual discrimination 
still existed, sure. It always would as long as there were physical differences 
between men and women and the world was populated by sinful people. But it had 
faded quite a bit from the time when Mama Wyeths little girl was a little boy, 
and Id missed it entirely. Besides, I was too worried about discrimination 
against me because I was a Cue to notice it might exist because I was a woman.
Thank you, Jody. Ive been wanting smack her myself for about three days. 
Resslers quick smile told me he was only kidding--mostly. I didnt blame them; 
I did have a mouth on me. I smiled and rubbed the back of my head.
Sorry. I get caught up sometimes. So you needed a strong right arm to help you 
out, huh? Why didnt you call for one of your buddies from TAU?
Because it could be checked on. Were able to get into units without too much 
difficulty since were normally injury or transfer replacements. Jody wasnt 
either The sergeant here was competent, healthy and still had four years to 
serve.
So where did you bury him?
Eh? Ressler seemed startled. Thats pretty cynical, young lady. And wrong. We 
didnt bury him. We messed up his service records and requested his presence at 
our Bern processing center. Once there, he transferred into TAU, effectively 
creating a hole that no one would think wed fill with one of our own. And we 
didnt.
So my atta-girl promotion was mostly a sham, Jody picked up with a touch of 
anger. Even worse, I stepped from a crack unit into a pile of backstabbing 
traitors who spent ninety percent of their time doing nothing and ten percent 
trying to do NATechs bidding. I hated it. She finished her drank and slammed 
the metal cup onto the table. Nobody tried to hide anything. They put all their 
faith in Company A, tossed Company B the scraps, and didnt even have a Company 
C. She laughed with derision. Scratch that. They did have a Company C; it was 
a Company B they didnt have. I was appalled at the lack of training and 
discipline in my people, but even more appalled when I found out that I wasnt 
even allowed to get them into shape. Company A and Sergeant Olecki handle that. 
She grinned. At least until today. Not to change the subject, but I loved the 
way you handled him today, Abigail. The look on his face when he realized hed 
been caught with his legs open by a girl!
I flushed and smiled and she laughed. Ressler cleared his throat.
Yes. Well, I heard about it and Im glad that Company B will finally get some 
proper training. Perhaps Olecki will step down and Jody can start doing her 
job.
Uh-huh. And maybe youll hit the lottery, I added.
He looked at me funny, but went on. In any event, when Jody showed up, I had my 
ally. And a good one, too. I had decided to wait about a month to let her size 
up the unit herself. After that, Id approach her and begin testing the waters 
about making her an active partner.
Imagine my surprise when she approached me, worried about the regiments 
demeanor. Thats when I knew Id chosen right.
Okay, thats great. Wonderful. All the spies are happy. But whats going on 
now? What are your plans and where do I fit in?
To be honest, Abigail, we didnt have any plans, Jody confessed. It wasnt 
until after you showed up and we found out a few things about you that we 
thought we really had a chance to do anything other than spy on this outfit. Now 
with your talent in the puterverse to help, we should be able to provide some 
concrete proof, maybe even take action.
I looked at her silently for a moment. She was way over her depth in this. That 
a TAU agent wouldnt have a plan of action would be like a dog stepping into a 
free-for-all with an empty slug gun. Yet Jody honestly believed him. I glanced 
over at Ressler.
Oh, he knew I wasnt falling for it! He had Jody bamboozled, but not me. How I 
hated this! I was more than half tempted to blurt out something to tip his hand, 
whatever it was. I would have paid real money to see the look on his face when I 
casually leaned over to Jody and said, You understand youre being played the 
sucker here, right? That Ressler only wants to use you as either a diversion 
from himself or to deflect the blow when he tells Posen to his face that the 
179th is the proof that NATech is using the Resistance to perpetuate this 
endless war. So, would you like to borrow my knife? And for the briefest 
moment, I did see the look on his face. He saw my eyes and knew for certain hed 
overestimated me. He was certain the immaturity and curiosity in me would 
overpower the full-grown soldier in me and Id wreck his precious TAU plans. And 
I came this close to doing it.
But I didnt. Ressler had won my conditional trust and despite my friendship to 
Jody, I would follow the rules and keep my trap shut. Maybe it was because of my 
friendship with Jody. Shed had enough tossing around with this intrigue and 
hidden agenda and dirty spy fighting. Jody was a fist and blaster type of dog, 
and would much rather approach things straight on. Why ruin her trust in TAU? 
Why tell her that the war she was fighting was to the benefit of NATech? It 
would gain nothing, and ruin her trust in the Resistance. I decided Id corner 
Ressler later and get the gory details.
Well, you and doc have my whole support, Jody. I got up and stretched, unable 
to stifle the yawn that came. Of course, right now my whole support is 
committed to keeping me standing, and failing quickly. I have got to get some 
sleep.
Ressler came to his feet quickly, partly out of concern for me, his patient, and 
partly out of relief that Id held my tongue. His small smile was just what I 
needed to make me feel a little relief myself.
Im very sorry, Abigail. Of course, you should turn in. You too, Jody. Were 
all pretty worn out. Theres not a whole lot we can do tonight anyway. Why dont 
you stop by tomorrow before your shift and Ill give you a once over. Which 
meant Id find out what I needed tomorrow.
We all said our goodnights. Jody and I walked down the dark corridor to the 
barracks.
What do you think of him? she asked in a quiet voice.
Good question. Part of me is glad hes TAU. Another part just wishes he was 
just a doctor. My life is complicated enough without getting involved in these 
kind of shenanigans.
She chuckled softly. Shenanigans? Ive never heard that word before. What does 
it mean?
Skullduggery. Tom foolery. Messing around.
You mean like bugging? Or Adospinning? I saw the gleam of her smile.
Goodnight, Jody.
She laughed. Goodnight, Abigail. By the way, Im glad Doctor Ressler is here, 
this stuff is way out of my league. Im even gladder youre here. You seem 
between the two of us, and I think Ill be able to cope a little more now. She 
gave me a quick hug then walked off to her quarters, leaving me in front of the 
barracks.
* * * *
Now, lying in my bed, feeling sleep finally creeping over me, I gave a small 
thought to Jodys question. What did I think of Doctor Ressler?
When Id said I had mixed emotions, I wasnt kidding. His being who he is was 
going to help out a lot. With all puterverse access denied to me, he was my only 
link to Mike and Kiki. Without access, it was impossible to move forward with my 
plan. But having that access meant sacrificing some of my freedom. Id known TAU 
had been keeping track of my work from the beginning. Theyd planned to use my 
rescue as a propaganda coup against NATech. After all, I had been one of their 
first senior officers and also their first guinea pig in riping. Never mind that 
the Resistance also managed to change my dance card; it was still propaganda 
fodder and a terrific moral victory for the dogs who fought to rescue us.
Those plans changed abruptly when it became apparent that I had real use in this 
century. My skills with the puterverse were strong to begin with, but after my 
first sharding episode, they increased to a fantastic height, and my value to 
the Resistance with them. I knew, had been told, that the Resistance had never 
planned on winning this war outright. They knew they couldnt. But they could 
win it by not losing, and that had been their goal from the outset--to wear 
NATech Supreme down to the point that they would lose their grip on our planet 
and normal relationships between business and government could return.
That changed with me. They now thought it might be possible for me to actually 
eliminate NATech. And they were right, that was my goal. Of course, if TAU knew 
what I knew about NATech Supreme, theyd probably do everything they could to 
stop me.
I had researched the problem thoroughly, with Mike doing millions of scenarios 
and billions of simulations. There was only one solution. It would destroy 
NATech, but the price would be high. Very high.
How had I my thinking arrived here? Oh yeah. Jody had asked me what I thought of 
Ressler being a TAU agent. Boy, talk about drifting tangents. My thoughts had 
reached this point when sleep caught up to me. I stretched once, then curled 
around my pillow. Id think about Ressler tomorrow.
* * * *
Doctor Scott Ressler was having no difficulty keeping his thoughts focused. And 
just as Abigail had been thinking about him, so he was putting his thoughts 
toward her. The similarity went further. He didnt know exactly what to think of 
this youth with the killer instinct, quick mind and most disturbing 
self-confidence. She seemed so much the chaotic, innocent young child-woman one 
moment, so much the cool, decisive and ruthless grown woman the next.
The ordeal in the puterverse had ravaged his insides--he was certain there had 
been some minor internal bleeding. But while it tired him physically it had 
charged him mentally. Hed known of Abigail for some time, though just through 
cursory references during strategic meetings at TAU. She was so very different 
from what hed pictured. And her abilities in the puterverse went far beyond 
anything hed prepared for. When hed first been instructed by TAU three days 
previously to make contact with her, they had provided what information about 
her they felt he needed. As always, it was adequate, but hed wished hed gotten 
more. Now he knew more than TAU did.
Unlimited level! There had been excitement and hope when constant analysis of 
Abigails movements in the puterverse had indicated shed broken level 
thirty-five. No one on the planet was known to have ever accessed that level. No 
one was known to have the stamina to survive at level thirty-five, let alone 
function in it. And now, just hours before, this slip of a girl had casually 
mentioned that shed disposed of any restricted access as too confining. With 
the same breath, shed destroyed the known fact that level sixty-four was the 
highest theoretical access; access, it seemed, was based on prime numbers and 
there were three additional levels above sixty-four And finally, with a 
certainty that only a teenager could have, she made it sound so obvious that was 
the real structure of puterverse coding, and that even level sixty-seven was 
behind her, because she had unlocked the secret of unbound trinary code.
His thoughts still racing, he looked down at his hands. They were trembling. 
They hadnt trembled like this since the night Diane was He took a deep, 
controlled breath to calm himself, then felt a lance in his lower ribs. He must 
have pulled a muscle. He massaged the area, but when he couldnt rub the pain 
away, he determined there must still be a little internal bleeding. He rose and 
prepared another dose of pink hemolixer and charged the closure sounder. He 
needed to make his report very soon, and hoped his strength held out. He would 
forgo his normal level and access at a much lower 11, which was the minimum 
level that would reach TAU Intelligence.
* * * *
Thank you for your report, Major. We will begin analyzing it immediately. The 
middle of the three figures spoke with a fatherly tone, concerned as much for 
Ressler as for the incredible data and information he had provided.
I have a couple of things Id like to end my report with, if you dont mind, 
sir. To keep the regimental security snoopers from spotting Resslers 
unauthorized transmission, it was beamed on an extremely low power carrier. 
Consequently, the image of Ressler was blurry and sparked occasionally from 
interference.
By all means. You know we very much respect your observations, Scott.
Thank you. The faded image looked down for a moment, as if still forming the 
best way to begin. Apparently finding it, he lifted his eyes boldly to the three 
cloaked and hooded figures.
What Sergeant Eyer and I saw tonight was unbelievable. The vast openness and 
beauty of the puterverse cant even be imagined! Ill wager a credit or two it 
probably cant even be recorded. Private Wyeth has accomplished something that 
until tonight was supposed to be impossible. Its clear that shes only been 
showing us what she wants us to see. While I would normally be extremely 
suspicious of being so easily manipulated, I have to admit to a certain 
confidence I have in her abilities and motives.
He looked down again, then continued. This goes against all training and past 
experience, sir, but well I have faith in her. Maybe its because of her raw 
power in the puterverse. Maybe its the sheer span of her life, the fact that 
shes been involved from the very beginning. Maybe its her own self-confidence 
and ability inside and outside the puterverse. Maybe its a combination of these 
things.
But I dont think it is. I think it was the look on her face when we were in 
the puterverse, in her world, as she called it. It was a look of constant joy. 
Even when our conversation took darker turns, I could still see that joy in her 
eyes. Sergeant Eyer saw it, too. Abigail Wyeth has a shimmer of hope and 
resolution in her that turns into happiness when it comes out. Im sorry to be 
so maudlin, sir, and I know this is completely unprovable and borders on naive. 
But I do have faith in her. It would be my counsel to continue monitoring her as 
closely as we can, and stand by to assist at a moments notice. That is my 
report. Goodnight. His image sparked and flickered and faded.
The three figures were silent, each staring into the space where Resslers image 
had been. A fourth figure passed through a ghost wall and entered the room. 
Walking to the nearest person, she handed over a tabinal and quietly exited. 
After a moment, the middle figure stirred.
So, Melissa. What is the accuracy of Scotts report?
Melissa pulled back the hood that covered her face from agents. All three wore 
identical clothing during reporting sessions to completely disguise their 
identity from visual recordings and analysis, just as voice replics disguised 
the audio portion of the transmissions.
He was absolutely right in at least one way, Kurt. She tapped the screen of 
the tabinal. Almost nothing was imaged. There are exactly five recordable 
seconds of this evenings trip. From the moment they first accessed until the 
shielding clamped around them. After that, nothing.
And for those five seconds?
She shook her head slightly. Almost nothing. A brightness that reaches 
ninety-nine percent screen output, a vague image of Resslers arms and hands as 
he falls to the ground, and several steady spates of blood.
Audio?
In answer, Melissa lifted up the tabinal and tapped it. A harsh crackling came 
from it, with partially broken words.
Mi..! . ne.. a co o xes my .ues ry! Another moment of hissing and 
spitting, and the tabinal became silent.
Wait. The third person raised a hand. Again, please. From the beginning. What 
was that sound just before the words?
Melissa tapped the unit again and adjusted the controls. All sound except 
interference was lost, so she reset the tabinal and tried again. This time, the 
interference was greatly reduced, and although the words were still garbled, 
they distinctly heard the first sound.
It was the boundless, joyful laugh of a young woman.
The third person nodded. Yes, I understand what Scott meant. He paused, then 
came to a decision. I say we accept Major Resslers counsel and continue our 
present course of polite monitoring.
But Thomas, do you think thats wise? Melissa objected mildly. Weve only now 
found out that our monitoring is easily restricted by Private Wyeth. Indeed, for 
all we know, she may be fabricating most of our transmissions, letting us see 
only what she wants us to see.
You could very well be right, Melissa. In fact, lets assume that for the 
moment. In that case, shes allowing us to receive this report from Major 
Ressler, she allowing us to see much of the make-up of the puterverse from an 
unbound trinary perspective, shes allowing us--
But even these things can be fabricated, Thomas, Kurt countered.
Thomas sighed. Fine. Lets say they are manipulated. For what gain? If she has 
that much ability, that much control, I should think Abigail could keep us from 
ever finding out about Mike and unlimited access and a deep-seated grudge 
against NATech.
I dont think thats so. Rachel and I had her at our home only a month ago, and 
I was able to see her in the flesh, to hear her opinions, to listen to her 
enthusiasm. Most of all, I heard her longing to make things right. He paused. 
I believe that she holds herself partially responsible for NATechs actions.
What? Kurt was bemused. Thomas, youve never told us this. Why not?
Because I could never be sure, Kurt. Not until tonight, when I heard Scotts 
report. Susan Lendler, you will remember, was a corporal in the Third and 
Abigails best friend. They had just arrived that evening, and Abigail was 
already in bed. Rachel, Susan and I were talking when Susan made an odd comment. 
We were marveling over Abigails past when talk drifted to the Pisces Project. 
We had already determined that Abigail, as John Wyeth, had created a viable way 
of adapting the human respiratory system to be amphibious. With this new 
ability, mankind could begin establishing an underwater society Since Susan was 
unaware of the level of our involvement, I feigned surprise. But I was very much 
surprised when we spoke about Pisces destruction and Susan said, Abigail was 
devastated when she found out. I have an idea thats one of the things she holds 
NATech accountable for.
She holds NATech accountable for Pisces destruction? Melissa said with 
surprise. Why? The Rock hit it in 2374, the second year of the first 
Terran/Martian conflict. NATech didnt rise to power until after the Wars.
Did it? Thats what I had always thought, too. Abigail doesnt think so. You 
heard Scotts report. That thing on the other side of the Quantum has been 
influencing our society for at least three hundred years. And the Wars were 
three hundred years ago. Abigail thinks that NATech is in league with that 
force, may even be that force. She probably thinks that NATech has been 
manipulating us far longer than three centuries. If thats so, I agree with 
Scott; we must continue our hands-off approach.
I dont know what to think, Kurt said frankly. Im sixty-one years old and 
have been on the Council now for twenty-seven years. I had always considered 
myself a competent servant of the Resistance, and a fairly intelligent person. 
But this is quickly getting beyond me. Weve been privy to an unbelievable 
picture of the puterverse, and learned that most of what we thought we knew is 
only the top layer of something were only beginning to comprehend. Yet this 
young girl bounces around without effort. She even has the energy to enjoy it!
So youre saying? Melissa prompted.
Kurt sighed heavily. Im saying that I agree with Thomas. We cant fool 
ourselves and think we can control her or the what shes fighting. We cant even 
be sure what were seeing is real. How do you cope with that? Lets continue our 
surveillance. How about you, Melissa? What are your thoughts?
My thoughts? Theyre just as jumbled as yours, Kurt. Its very difficult to 
accept that were being led around by the very person weve been trying to lead. 
Just rewards, I suppose. On the one hand, shes a young girl, perhaps not 
completely in control of herself. On the other hand, shes one of NATechs first 
and brightest, the person who created the Pisces people. If I had to decide on 
my thoughts, I couldnt.
My feelings, though, thats very different. I heard that laugh. Its been a 
long time since Ive heard such unbounding joy. To be so young and confident 
again! Lets put faith in that confidence and joy. Abigail isnt telling us 
everything, but I think that single moment of happiness told me enough.
* * * *
Begin pseudo trinary code programming: Statement: John Wyeth is alive. 
Probability of statement accuracy is 1 occurrence per 56,812 scenarios. 
Statement: John Wyeth persona is a threat to This Unit. Probability of statement 
accuracy is estimated 1 occurrence per 35,000,000,000,000 scenarios. Reassessing 
probabilities.
[Thread 1: Retrieving known information on John Wyeth persona. Retrieved. 
Previously recorded system personas of John Wyeth: initial system persona 
generated by Christopher Balen Young on May 14, 2026. Tangent 1
[begin tangent: Initial system persona. Organic persona John Wyeth terminated as 
scheduled, March 26, 2026. Organic persona resided in NATech tertiary processing 
unit 17 Gamma for 523 hours. Transferred to secondary processing unit 8 Beta for 
programming and warehousing of existing data concerning Pisces project. Modified 
system persona transferred to NATech primary unit 6 Alpha 4,493 hours after 
initial download. Persona focused on Pisces project for duration of existence. 
Persona archived. Probability of survival: 1128 per 1139 scenarios. Probability 
of threat to This Unit: 0 occurrences per infinite scenarios. end tangent.]
processed. Recorded as terminated and covertly archived February 3, 2045. System 
persona reprogrammed and merged covertly as primary net access alpha .311 on 
August 9, 2051. Tangent 2
[begin tangent: System persona primary net access alpha .311. Archived system 
persona prepared and installed into global net. Persona active for 1,748,645 
hours Persona processed 15,737,916,152 routines. Persona focused on compliance 
of requests of global population, non-security issues, and compliance of This 
Units requests, all issues. System persona closed and transferred. Probability 
of survival: 989 per 1015 scenarios. Probability of threat to This Unit: 1 
occurrence per 6,694,000,000,000 scenarios. Conclusion: Risk acceptable. end 
tangent.]
processed. System persona reprogrammed and transferred to Orbital Station Gamma 
January 28, 2251. Tangent 3
[begin tangent: System persona Orbital Station Gamma. Modified system persona 
introduced to prime procedural core. Persona utilized as orbital station 
operational system for 204,042 hours. System persona processed 
85,901,552,000,006 routines. System persona focused on all navigational, repair 
and flight control requests for station personnel, and This Units classified 
requests. System persona terminated and transferred. Probability of survival: 
713 per 882 scenarios. Probability of threat to This Unit: 1 per 
4,840,000,000,000 scenarios. Conclusion: Risk acceptable. end tangent.]
processed. System persona reprogrammed and integrated into manufactured 
biological unit May 11, 2274. Biological unit subjected to compulsive system 
transfer December 4, 2315. Tangent 4
[begin tangent: System persona manufactured biological unit. Persona active for 
unknown hours; estimated at 364,200 hours. Tangent 4.1
[begin tangent: Flesh unit: Female human. Fifteen years of age at time of 
integration. No defects reported during development. Unit reproductive systems 
rendered inoperative during fifteenth year of growth prior to system persona 
integration. No relevant information in this inquiry. end tangent.]
processed Processed routines: unknown. No estimate available. Persona 
transferred into biological unit at Paris biological manufacturing plant at 
request of This Unit. Tangent 4.2
[begin tangent: System persona designated Miss DeChant. Unit programmed with 
high morals, modest intelligence, subdued personality capable of long servitude. 
Reproductive desires deactivated during 15th year of growth. Unit extremely 
efficient performing domestic duties. Unit assigned to Philip LeClaire for 
purposes of long-term study of introducing theoretical pseudo trinary code into 
a willing subject for purposes of future harvest by This Unit. Tangent 4.2.1
[begin tangent: Philip LeClaire: Human unit with advanced skills in cognitive 
theory and application. Considered gifted in fields of sonics and mental 
collaboration. Scanning relative information. Scanning complete. Relevant 
information: Class of 51. Keyed memory encapsulation: A procedure by which 
coded knowledge can be compressed to a ratio of 6,500,000,000 to 1, thus 
achieving maximum synapse efficiency which in turn allowed for a perpetuating 
development of additional nerve ending and increased synaptic output within a 
specific portion of a biological processing unit. Because of the organic nature 
of KME, the procedure is impossible to duplicate using non-organic material. The 
only known subject to which LeClaire applied his theories was his housekeeper 
Miss DeChant shortly before they were terminated. Tangent 4.2.1.1
[begin tangent: Historical reference 845889.18399: Termination of Philip 
LeClaire and system persona Miss DeChant, December 4, 2315, 10:37 PM, 
Fountainebleau, Paris Anti-terrorist forces invade the LeClaire chateau under 
full belligerent status. Report indicates credit of LeClaires termination 
awarded to Private Nicole Ferrier. Report indicates termination of Miss DeChant, 
no credit awarded. Philip LeClaires body damaged beyond usefulness. Miss 
DeChants body, located in her bed, was relatively undamaged and was confiscated 
for examination. Tangent 4.2.1.1.1
[begin tangent: System persona was archived and the biological unit was 
surrendered to university resources for further study. Study retrieved. No 
additional information gathered. end tangent.]
processed. Conclusion: No relevance to calculating threat to This Unit. end 
tangent.]
processed Biological vivisection of the subject was conducted. An enhanced 
synaptic capsule was located and analyzed. Analysis determined that preliminary 
keyed encapsulation layout had begun but was incomplete. Parallel mnemonic 
inlays had not been implemented, making further investigation useless. Tangent 
4.2.1.2
[begin tangent: Reanalysis of study. Introducing assumption of failure of 
initial study. Analysis complete. Keyed encapsulation layout had been completed. 
Parallel mnemonic inlays had been implemented at sub-neuron level. Assumption: 
KME is transferable during system persona reprogramming. Speculation: Parallel 
mnemonic inlays have continued development for minimum 4,000,000 hours. Possible 
conclusion: Inlay routine has reached full potential. Assumption: Inlay routine 
is hostile to continuation of This Units existence. Probability of threat to 
This Unit: Uncertain but present. end tangent.]
processed. Assumption: Philip LeClaire succeeded in implementation of This 
Units requested routine without This Units knowledge. Conclusion: Philip 
LeClaire had resolved to hide successful implementation from This Unit to avoid 
being considered a threat to This Unit. Conclusion: Probability of system 
persona being a threat to This Unit is increased. Estimated probability is 1 
occurrence per 84,108 scenarios. end tangent.]
processed Assumption: Philip LeClaire had reason to become hostile to This Unit 
after 48 years service. Speculation One: Philip LeClaire gained unauthorized 
knowledge of This Units purpose. Speculation Two: Implementation of KME failed 
expectations. Speculation Three: Implementation of KME exceeded expectations. 
Speculation Two discarded as irrelevant to This Unit. Speculation One discarded 
as concluded relevancy outside of This Units control. Speculation Three 
accepted as greatest threat to This Unit. Probability of threat to This Unit: 1 
per 198. end tangent.]
processed Persona modified by This Unit at request of Philip LeClaire, NATech 
associate number 99145. Conclusion: Philip LeClaire succeeded in KME and 
subverted the results to threaten This Unit. Results of KME experimentation were 
beyond expectations of creating biological unit capable of pseudo trinary code. 
Conclusion: KME with matured parallel mnemonic inlays are capable of bound 
trinary code in 1000 per 1000 scenarios. Units capable of unbound trinary code 
do not occur. System persona terminated and archived. Probability of threat to 
This Unit: 7 per 100 scenarios. end tangent.]
processed. System persona reprogrammed and transferred to PlaNet Defense core 
January 16, 2316, processing terminated. System persona inaccessible to This 
Unit until January 8, 2433. System persona recorded as destroyed January 8, 
2433. Destruction verified. Tangent 5
[begin tangent: Internal Reference 35509.93295.2943: Termination of organic 
persona John Wyeth January 8, 2433. Termination completed by Technicians 
Assistant First Class Greg Hearn. Tangent 5.1
[begin tangent: Internal Reference 35509.83274.9021: Permanent records of TAFC 
Greg Hearn. Served February 13, 2410 to October 9, 2433. Executed for treason. 
Tangent 5.1.1
[begin tangent: Trial and Execution of TAFC Greg Hearn. Convicted of record 
falsification and treasonous delivery of archived system personas to illegal 
corporations. Indication of over 20 years activity. Executed 32 minutes after 
conviction. Execution verified. end tangent.]
processed Probability of falsification of destruction of organic persona John 
Wyeth: 99 occurrences per 100 scenarios. end tangent]
processed. Conclusion: Organic persona John Wyeth with attached system persona 
Miss DeChant was not terminated. end tangent.]
processed Destruction not verified. Conclusion, Thread One: John Wyeth is alive 
with capability of bound trinary code. Conclusion, Thread One: John Wyeth is 
hostile to This Unit. Probability of threat to This Unit: 79 occurrences per 93 
scenarios. end thread.]
[Thread 2: Implementing history reconstruction on organic persona John Wyeth 
after January 8, 2433. Scanning Lendler report for previously unknown system 
personas. Scanned. Probability of system persona integrated into biological unit 
in 2433. Tangent 1
[begin tangent: System persona transfer into biological unit in 2433. Tangent 
1.1
[begin tangent: 155 system persona transfers conducted from January 1, 2433 
until December 31, 2433. Verifying all transfers. Completed. 152 verified. 
Assessing probability of 3 unverified transfers as being organic persona John 
Wyeth. Tangent 1.1.1
[begin tangent: Subject: System persona transferred into framed processing unit 
January 1, 2433. Used by Lloyd Devlin for opium trade calculations. Lloyd Devlin 
was executed and all possessions destroyed January 6, 2433, 41 hours before 
scheduled termination of archived PlaNet Defense core. end tangent.]
processed. Tangent 1.1.2
[begin tangent: Subject: System persona integrated into manufactured biological 
unit May 2, 2469. Flesh unit. Male human. 17 years at time of integration. 
Programmed as Lunar Class Pleasure Unit to provide sexual stimulation and 
satisfaction to a wide variety of partners. No defects reported during 
development. Unit reproductive system rendered sterile shortly before persona 
integration. Unit discovered crushed beneath wall February 11, 2437. Autopsy 
impossible due to extreme drug overdose and deterioration of corpse. Cause of 
death unknown, but units organic processing unit was missing 83 percent of 
estimated mass. end tangent.]
processed. Tangent 1.1.2
[begin tangent: Subject: System persona integrated into manufactured biological 
unit May 3, 2433. Flesh unit. Female human. 14 years at time of integration. 
Programmed as outlawed Shiva Class Pleasure Unit to provide sexual stimulation 
and satisfaction to a wide variety of partners through submission to sexual 
and/or violent acts. No defects reported during development. Unit reproductive 
system rendered sterile shortly before integration. Unit mental capacities 
severely truncated and modifications to organic processing unit rendered system 
persona unable to distinguish between acts of violence and pleasure. Unit 
psychic imprints enhanced to cause arousal and agitation in units sexual 
partner. Unit killed June 12, 2442. Autopsy determined cause of death to be 
strangulation. Unit also had massive blood loss due to 32 lacerations, punctures 
and knife wounds. Body was in poor physical condition due to malnutrition and 
extensive physical damage. System persona recorded as being archived. 
Conclusion: This biological unit contained organic persona of John Wyeth. 
Conclusion: Persona was successfully archived June 12, 2442. end tangent.]
processed Female Shiva Class Pleasure Unit contained organic persona of John 
Wyeth. end tangent.]
processed. John Wyeth organic persona continued. Observation: Triggering of this 
system persona to shard with organic persona will cause physical debilitation 
and mental incapacitation in 126 occurrences of 126 scenarios. end tangent.]
processed. Probability of organic persona of John Wyeth transfer into hypership 
engineering core June 16, 2442. Tangent 2
[begin tangent: System persona transferred into hypership Daybreaker June 16, 
2442. Daybreaker left planetary system March 17, 2443. There have been no 
reported sightings of the Daybreaker since March 24, 2443. Tangent 2.1
[begin tangent: Hypership Daybreaker requested final approval to enter Orion 
hyperidor. Approval granted, ship entered hyperidor. end tangent.]
processed Conclusion: Based upon Thread Statement, probability of organic 
persona of John Wyeth being transferred to hypership Daybreaker does not exist. 
end tangent.]
processed. Probability of organic persona of John Wyeth transfer into Two Rivers 
Apartments in Vancouver, Lesser Canada, June 18, 2442. Tangent 3
[begin tangent: System persona transferred into Two Rivers Apartments 
maintenance and security systems. Apartment complex still in existence. 
Accessing security systems records. Accessed. Organic persona of John Wyeth 
operated as Two Rivers Apartments system persona for 664,680 hours, from June 
18, 2442April 16, 2518. System output and utilization irrelevant. end tangent.].
processed. Probability of organic persona of John Wyeth transfer into power 
plant three at Sydney Fusion Station May 11, 2518. Tangent 4
[begin tangent: System persona transferred into power plant three of Sydney 
Fusion facility. Accessing Australian Fusion Regulatory Committee archives. 
Accessed. Organic persona of John Wyeth operated as Sydney Fusion system persona 
for 223,907 hours, from May 11, 2518 to November 25, 2543. Verified. System 
output and utilization irrelevant. end tangent.]
processed. Probability of organic persona of John Wyeth transfer into Thames 
Foundry central core December 11, 2543. Tangent 5
[begin tangent: System persona transferred into Thames Foundry central core. 
Verified. Accessing Thames Foundry Maintenance Records. Accessed. Organic 
persona of John Wyeth operated as Thames Foundry system persona for 1,156,265 
hours, from December 11, 2543 to November 6, 2675. System persona reported 
off-line November 6, 2675. System output and utilization irrelevant. System 
persona reported missing November 7, 2675. Tangent 5.1
[Begin tangent: Cohort report RES26751107.72. Report submitted by Lieutenant 
Randolf Laffredo. Investigation of Thames Foundry central core showed forced 
entrance through main security using energy weapons used by several Resistance 
regiments, including the 3rd, 51st, 82nd, and 112th. Blast points and method of 
system persona retrieval consistent with Resistance methods. Conclusion: 
Resistance personnel acquired organic persona of John Wyeth. end tangent.]
processed Probability of system persona containing organic persona of John 
Wyeth: 854 occurrences in 903 scenarios. end tangent.]
processed. Probability of system persona transferred into unknown host in 2676. 
Tangent 6
[begin tangent: Probability of transfer of organic persona of John Wyeth. 
Assumption one: Patterns of Resistance actions indicate near certainty organic 
persona was integrated into manufactured biological unit. Tangent 6.1
[begin tangent: Verification of assumption. Cross referencing thefts of 
biological units from physiomanufacturing plants within one month of theft of 
organic persona from Thames Foundry. Tangent 6.1.1
[begin tangent: Regiment activity. 3rd Regiment: Active. Theft of 1 flesh unit 
from physiomanufacturing plant in Bern on October 25, 2676. Tangent 6.1.1.1
[begin tangent: Theft of flesh unit: Female human. 14 years at time of theft. No 
defects reported during development. Unit reproductive systems scheduled for 
sterilization August 1, 2677. Due to theft, unit was not sterilized. No other 
restrictions or modifications were scheduled or performed on unit. Conclusion: 
Unit is viable and desirable candidate for organic persona transfer. end 
tangent.]
processed. 51st Regiment: Non-active. 82nd Regiment: Theft of 3 flesh units from 
physiomanufacturing plant in Hong Kong on October 14th, 2676. Tangent 6.1.1.2
[begin tangent: Theft of 3 flesh units. Tangent 6.1.1.2.1
[begin tangent: Theft of flesh unit: Female human. 8 years at time of theft. No 
defects reported during development. Unit nonviable for transference of system 
or organic persona for another 31,500 hours. Conclusion: Organic persona of John 
Wyeth was not transferred into this unit. end tangent.]
processed. Tangent 6.1.1.2.2
[begin tangent: Theft of flesh unit: Male human. 16 years at time of theft. No 
defects reported during development, but unit has been harvested 4 times in the 
last 45,000 hours and would terminate within 6 hours of theft. Probability of 
termination: 100 occurrences per 100 scenarios. end tangent.]
processed. Tangent 6.1.1.2.3
[begin tangent: Theft of flesh unit: Female human. 17 years at time of theft. 
Reported defects: Blindness, deafness, severe brain damage. Defects occurred 4 
minutes, 18 seconds prior to theft. Defects attributed to hemolixer electrical 
discharge into biotube due to damage from combat. Probability of unit survival: 
59 occurrences per 100 scenarios. Conclusion: All scenarios irrelevant. Damage 
to unit would render organic persona inoperative. end tangent.]
processed Probability of organic persona of John Wyeth being transferred into 
flesh units stolen by 82nd Regiment: 1 occurrence per 870 scenarios. Conclusion: 
organic person transferal not achieved. end tangent.]
processed. 112th Regiment: Active. Theft of 1 flesh unit from 
physiomanufacturing plant in Buenos Aires on November 20, 2676. Tangent 6.1.1.3
[begin tangent: Theft of flesh unit: Male human. 16 years of age at time of 
theft. No reported defects during development. Unit has been modified: 
Sterilization of sexual reproductive system. Embedding of compulsory persona 
4221 Trojan Horse betrayal routine. Unit will indicate presence through 
neurosonic pulses transmitting at .000021 hertz. Tangent 6.1.1.3.1
[begin tangent: Accessing neurosonic pulse at .000021 hertz. Accessed. Pulse 
still active. Unit still functional. Conclusion: Unit must be rendered 
nonfunctional. end tangent.]
processed Activating subpersona 4221.3 Battle Horse destruct routine. Unit will 
self destruct within 15 minutes. Probability of transfer of organic persona of 
John Wyeth into this unit will be irrelevant in maximum 15 minutes. end 
tangent.]
processed Conclusion: female unit stolen by 3rd Regiment most likely scenario to 
contain organic persona of John Wyeth. end tangent.]
processed Probability organic persona of John Wyeth was transferred into 
manufactured biological unit: 97 occurrences in 112 occurrences. end tangent.]
processed. Assumption two: Patterns of Resistance actions indicate high 
probability of restoration of organic persona. Tangent 6.2
[begin tangent: Verification of assumption. Accessing Resistance medical 
database. Accessed. 3rd Regiment medical facilities managed by Doctor Philip 
Barrett. Tangent 6.2.1
[begin tangent: Medical records of Philip Elijah Barrett: Graduated Johns 
Hopkins Medical Universal City highest honors class of 2653. Joined Resistance 
movement 2659. Assigned to 3rd Regiment September 23, 2661. Estimated cognitive 
reconstruction patients: 1600. Executing probability wave pattern 34F. 
Completed. Public record scans return an estimated 1375 processed Cues in 
current society. end tangent.]
processed Normal reintegration success rate of 62.55% increased to estimated 
84.07% due to superior capabilities of Philip Barrett. Conclusion: Probability 
of original organic persona John Wyeth surviving reintegration is 84 occurrences 
per 100 scenarios. end tangent.]
processed John Wyeth is active in human female unit connected to the destroyed 
3rd Regiment. Tangent 6.3
[begin tangent: Destruction of 3rd Regiment June 12, 2679. Class 67h d6 8ijfr89 
hjngtr79 56 tr bj 753vnk y tr89i hn rt6 ioktg 6 9 ui bn r 5 8 uihn r 
6fhgu675hjk787 gfthji86ghj 765fbj88 hhbt578kngghkou dcnk,if s3w54yubruu fgu8 r 
fhyi8trvyu i466wn9t 87j nib54 hrj78jn ryft 46 958h 56gh67hg ified. Processed. 
Probability of John Wyeth persona surviving Sand Rat Debacle: Certain due to 
independent verification. end tangent.]
processed John Wyeth is active human female unit connected to the 179th 
Regiment. end tangent.]
processed. Conclusion: John Wyeth is alive. Most likely scenario indicates John 
Wyeth has use of bound trinary code through maturation of KME mnemonic inlays. 
Most likely scenario indicates John Wyeth has knowledge of This Units 
existence. Most likely scenario indicates John Wyeth able to destroy This Unit. 
Damn you, Philip LeClaire. end thread.]
[Thread 3: Resolution of reassessed probabilities of threat to This Unit. 
Termination required. Retrieval of KME organic processing unit required. 
Conflicting requirements. Resolution: Modified termination required. Termination 
restricted to John Wyeth organic persona. Retrieval of current biological form 
of John Wyeth after persona dissolution required. Accelerated persona 
dissolution by intense assault required. Estimated 3,000 hours required before 
assault will produce acceptable effect. Estimated 3,020 hours until retrieval of 
flesh unit. Method: Achieve cascading sharding episodes through aggressive use 
of outside stimuli. Result: Catastrophic collapse and ultimate dissolution of 
John Wyeth before--or during--dissection and harvesting of KME mnemonic inlays 
embedded within organic processing unit.
Action: Initiating concentrated assault on John Wyeth persona. Estimated time to 
first assault: 30 minutes. end thread.]
end program.


Chapter Five
The barracks was very quiet when Gina Hawthorne returned from Lieutenant Posens 
room at two thirty in the morning. In order to keep B Company this quiet during 
night operations, an alpha wave dampening field was broadcast from hidden 
emitters in the ceiling. The result was all personnel slipped into a deeper 
state of unconsciousness. Only intense shaking, very loud noises or otherwise 
extreme conditions could disturb this level of induced sleep. Gina intensely 
disliked being subjected to the field--it made her as helpless to attack as the 
dogs she was paid to hate. But it was a necessary evil. And since the new 
recruit had shown up, Posen had issued her a stimulant that somewhat 
counteracted the dampening field. She had wondered why. Now she knew.
Gina knelt beside the sleeping recruit--her name was Amanda or Abigail or 
something like that--and looked at the sleeping face. So peaceful. But also so 
deadly, as she had seen yesterday in the training room and as Lieutenant Posen 
had so strongly emphasized only twenty minutes ago. Not that it mattered. This 
girl was against NATech Supreme and would have to be incapacitated. But not 
killed. Gina smiled in anticipation. Killing was too crude, anyway. Far better 
to kill their spirit, and let them know it, than to kill them and put them 
beyond all knowing. Hearing them beg and plead was the best reward for this kind 
of work. And this girl was almost too easy, because Posen had given Gina two 
sharding disks.
She pulled one of the micro inducers out of her pocket and placed it against the 
girls left temple. Similar to the inducers used in IHADs, this micro unit sent 
a specific signal to the frontal lobes that momentarily weakened the persona 
barriers in ripes. It was a device used frequently by NATech Suppression Squads 
to increase the chances and intensity of sharding episodes. Even better, if one 
knew how to trigger any of the false personas contained in the Shards mind, the 
Shard became that false persona. And Posen had told Gina how to trigger a very 
exciting ripe.
To think! A persona who would beg to be beaten! A helpless plaything that could 
not discern between pain and pleasure. Ginas heart pounded from the 
anticipation of the next two and a half hours. She would teach this girl real 
pain. She would teach her the difference between pain and pleasure!
Gina thrilled from the danger that came with covert assignments. If discovered 
by a loyal Resistance dog, Gina would be attacked and possibly captured. If she 
became too wrapped up in her assignment and killed the girl, she, Gina, would 
also be killed, by NATech. Posen had given her a few details of the messy way 
shed be terminated. Gina enjoyed listening. She loved the flavor of fear mixed 
with excitement. She felt the tingle of the hunt and activated the sharding 
disk.
The inducer gave a squeal, then flashed briefly. The girl looked no different, 
but her outward appearance was misleading Inside her mind, jagged pieces of 
neurosonic bursts were shredding the artificial barriers between each of the 
personas. Gina had to act quickly. There was only enough power for eight or ten 
seconds. She began shaking the girl.
Wake up! Gina ordered in a quiet but firm voice. Useless trash! No one said 
you could go to sleep! Now, wake up! The girl began to stir.
* * * *
I was so sleepy. I opened my eyes and saw lots of dark. There was someone in 
front of me, and I heard a high sound. What what
The person in front of me covered my mouth. I started to scream, then choked as 
I felt a blow in my stomach. The hand over my mouth twisted my face, and in my 
pain I saw I was looking into the eyes of a woman. I knew her. It was it was
She hit me again and I knew who I was. The woman I thought I knew smiled.
Youre going to do as I tell you. Now, do not cry out. She hit me in the tummy 
again, and laughed when I started to moan. I almost cried out, but was happy I 
didnt. I lay still and looked into her eyes. She was acting like an owner. Was 
she my owner, or did my owner give me to her for a while? Her lip was bleeding. 
She must have bitten it, out of happiness of seeing me like this. She licked the 
blood and stood up.
I need to give you a beating, girl. But not here. Lets go someplace private. 
She grabbed my hair and jerked me to my feet. I was in a large room with lots of 
other girls. Did she own all of them? She kicked me in the back, and I stumbled 
into a dark hallway. I was very proud that I didnt make a sound, just like Id 
been told.
She kept shoving me down the hallway until we came to a doorway. I went past it, 
but she grabbed me and turned me around. I smiled at her. She hit me with her 
fist and threw me into the doorway. It was very dark inside, but I could see it 
was a big bathroom. That was good. Lots of my memories were in bathrooms.
This is the mens showers. We wont be disturbed here. Company A isnt going to 
interfere, and Company B, including the men, is under a dampening field. I 
didnt understand what she was talking about. It didnt matter. I was where I 
belonged, and I think my new owner liked me. After all, shed hit me and made me 
feel good, right? And now she was looking at me the same way all my other owners 
had. All except the little girl owner in the bright round room. She had been 
different. All my owners were nice, but she was nice in a different way.
Wait. Didnt the little girl tell me that she was my owner? Or did I think it? I 
was confused. I was sure that the little girl was my real owner. Then who was 
this I felt a hard hand strike my face and I fell down, feeling wonderful. I 
was so afraid! I loved being afraid. I looked up at her from the hard floor, 
then rose to my knees.
Look at you! Youre worthless!
I--Im sorry!
Why did she say that? She liked hitting me and I only wanted to please her. She 
was my owner. But what about the little girl? Are you my owner? I asked. I 
thought that my owner was
You thought? Idiot! You cant think! Yes, Im your owner. Do you doubt me?
NO! No, I dont doubt you! She did sound like an owner. Its just that I 
looked down. She was nice. Im sorry. Do you want me?
Yes. Yes, I do. Come here.
Happy to be able to do something, I got to my feet and walked up to her. She 
kicked me viciously, once in each leg, and I fell to my knees, where I belonged. 
My legs were pounding and they hurt. My left leg was filled with a sharp pain, 
like when Im cut up with glass. I think it was broken. I heard her grunt with 
pleasure. She slapped me in the face, and I felt a streak of blood on my cheek. 
It was a very sharp pain and I cried.
I told you not to cry out!
Im sorry! I didnt mean to! Ill be better next time, I promise! She stood 
there waiting for me, so I took off my top and dropped it, then hugged her 
around the waist, sobbing into her. She pressed my face hard against her body, 
stroking my hair. She seemed both tense and excited. The pain in my legs and her 
soft touch blended together and started a fire in my heart.
Would you like me to hit you now?
She really did like me! I felt so wonderful and wanted inside. Oh, yes! Id 
love that! How would you like me to be?
Thats just fine. I started to laugh with happiness, but then couldnt because 
she kicked her knee into my neck. My throat got hot and stopped working and I 
fell back to the floor. It felt warm against my bare back. I tried to get up so 
she could hit me again, but I didnt have to. She must have liked the way I 
looked on the floor because she came up to me and kicked me twice, once in my 
tummy and once below my tummy. That was so nice! Usually, I had to crawl over to 
my owner. Hard knots of good feeling exploded from my middle, then leaked out to 
my arms and legs. Pretty lights started shining in my eyes and my head was very 
full of something hot. I started to curl up around my pain, wanting to get close 
to it, but she put me on my back and mounted me. I waited for her to decide what 
she was going to do next. I coughed a couple of times and got to swallow some 
blood. I was so happy! She loved me! I saw the way her blouse moved up and down 
from her hard breathing. Her face was flushed and her eyes were very bright. She 
pressed my hands back, squeezing my wrists with all her strength. Her nails 
broke my skin, coating our hands with sweet, pretty blood. She was angry and 
excited. I saw her stare at my breasts and I wiggled for her.
I want to make you happy, I whispered, trying to make her like me enough to 
kiss me. My insides were warm and sticky, and I felt that wonderful feeling in 
my body that I got when my owner beat me or used me. I loved her. I smiled up at 
her.
Are you going to take me now? Please? I love you.
She gasped and let go of me. I felt her weight come off me as she moved away. I 
got up on my knees a little, only my tummy made me bend over. But I liked that. 
I looked at her, scared I had not pleased her.
Im sorry! Did I say something wrong? Trying to think of a way to make things 
better, I put my hands down to my panties and started to take them off. I felt a 
twinge in my tummy. That meant I was hurt very bad. I smiled, thinking how hard 
shed kicked me. She must be my real owner to love me that much.
What are you doing? she yelled at me. I looked at her, confused.
I dont understand! I sobbed, then fell forward to my hands and knees, 
coughing. My leg was burning. Burning with love and pain. Arent you going to 
take me? Or would you like to beat me some more? My insides are all hot, but I 
think I can stay awake a little longer. I promise Ill try.
She stepped up close. She looked confused. What do you mean? You know how badly 
youre hurt, but you want me to keep hitting you?
Oh, yes! I said, feeling happy again. I love it when you hit me! Or you can 
play with me. Thats nice, too! I took her hand and placed it on me. Touch me 
here.
She got mad and scared and took her hand away. No! She looked confused again, 
and not at all like my other owners. I--I mean, get dressed. Right now!
Okay. My panties were close, so I put them on first. My left leg was burning 
with fire, only I couldnt see it because it was inside my leg and not on top of 
my leg, like it was with my other owner. Not Deke. The other one. But not the 
first other one. The second other one. But not Deke. Deke was my first owner. I 
slid my panties on. A shiver went up my back, making me gasp and giggle.
Whats wrong? she asked. Does it hurt?
Yes! Its wonderful! I exclaimed, working my panties up over my upper legs. 
Your first kick was so hard it broke the bone. I rubbed my leg. See? You can 
feel the break right here. And see the bump? It you kick me again in the same 
place, the bone should come out. It makes me feel so pretty. My top was a 
little ways away, so I started to crawl toward it. I heard a step and waited for 
the blow, hoping it would be in my leg. Either that or my tummy. Instead, she 
picked up my top and knelt beside me.
Here, let me help you. she said. I was so confused. This was nice, but why 
didnt she hit me? I think I knew why she didnt have sex with me; the little 
girls friend, the one with the dark, dark skin and dark, dark eyes, said that 
some girls didnt play with other girls. I didnt really understand, but I think 
I did a little. Maybe my owner was like that. But maybe she thought I was like 
that. I should try again.
She was right next to me when she pulled my top over my head, so I kissed her. 
She hit my mouth, then jumped back, wiping her mouth.
Whats wrong with you, Shard? Dont you realize I was trying to kill you?
Yes, I am! I promise I understand! Thank you.
Thank you? I break your leg and you say thank you?
Im sorry! I cried, afraid Id said the wrong thing. I dont like talking! It 
hurts me and makes me have to think and I say everything bad. Im sorry. I had 
an idea and smiled. If you want, Ill stop talking and we can just play.
But youre hurt.
I know.
She looked at me, then came back and put my top on me. I wanted to kiss her 
again, but I was pretty sure she didnt want me to. She finished, then swore and 
turned me to her, raising a fist. I lifted my face up to her and closed my eyes, 
waiting.
But she didnt hit me. She grabbed my shoulders and began shaking me.
Arent you going to fight back?
No, I said with surprise. Thats wrong. I should never fight an owner. 
Besides, why should I fight something that makes me feel good? All my owners 
taught me that. Even Stays and Cut taught me that, and they werent my owners. 
Only Stays almost was, but he wasnt. But Deke was good. You are, too. She 
jerked like something hit her. I looked at her, a little confused. Arent 
owners the same way?
She didnt say anything. She just stared at me with wet eyes. I noticed that 
when people were quiet like this, they were sometimes thinking. Either that or 
they were asleep. But her eyes were open, so she was thinking. She saw me 
staring at her and she smiled.
Yes. Yes, I think we are. But arent you afraid?
I thought about that. I hated hard questions, but she wanted an answer, so I 
tried real hard to answer.
Well, I always try to be afraid. It makes me feel like a big girl!
No, not that way. I mean, arent you ever afraid in a bad way?
Oh! That kind of afraid. Yes, a little. Im sad when I dont do what Im told. 
And Im afraid when Im alone. Theres this bright round room that I stay in, 
and--
No. She was becoming sad and a little angry. She pulled me close to her strong 
body. I mean, arent you afraid youll be killed when this happens? When people 
like When people like me do these things to you?
What a silly question! Why? If it makes you happy to kill me, then Im happy, 
too! I thought a little bit. But I would be a little sad because I couldnt 
make you happy anymore after that, because Id be dead. I remember no, Im 
sorry.
What? What do you remember?
A knife. Or was it glass? Yes, it was glass the last time. That was when my 
owner two owners ago wanted to kill me. He had owned me for a while then was 
tired of loving and hurting me. I tried hard to please him! I really did. But he 
kept saying I was making him turn into me, or something. I didnt understand. 
Then one night he came home and was very angry and scared, like you are now. He 
said, Youve made me like you are, and Im destroyed. That was the night he 
took me into the bathroom and put the glass into me. He put it in my tummy and 
my arms and my eyes and I shook my head. I cant remember anymore.
Try. I felt a tear splash on my face. She was looking away. What was wrong?
Why are you asking me all these questions? I was getting scared she didnt 
like me anymore. Lets not talk! I dont like talk! I started coughing very 
hard.
Whats wrong? Are you all right? She talked in a loud voice, but she sounded 
far, far away.
I think I can stay awake. The fire in my leg was going away, and I suddenly 
felt a big thing in my stomach. I rolled onto the floor and wrapped up into a 
little ball. Im sorry! I cant stay awake! My tummys moving all around and my 
special place feels all full. I think Im all full of blood. Thats why Im all 
tingly and excited! I giggled and touched myself. I can taste my blood like 
its my dinner!
She jerked, then leaned back against the wall, but still close to me. She was 
crying. I was sad she didnt like me anymore.
Whats your name? she asked softly.
Oh, I dont have a name, I said, glad to finally hear a question I could 
answer. Ive never had one. Im just here to do as Im told. Whats your name?
My name? She was a little surprised. Maybe I asked a good question.
Uh-huh. My other owners had names. And all the people I saw had names, I 
think. I had to stop talking to cough. Every time I coughed, something pinched 
my tummy and squeezed my lungs. Theyre all important. You must be even more 
important, because youre so good at being an owner. So that means you have a 
name. I was proud that I could think of that.
She began to say something, but I started coughing again. I was getting sleepy. 
She shook me and called to me to stay awake.
Im so sorry! Is there something I can do to make you feel better? she said.
I smiled and coughed. Blood spilled on the floor from my mouth. She did like me! 
She was going to let me decide! Yay! I could ask her to play with me. That would 
be nice! But I dont think I worked there anymore. Then I thought of something 
even nicer.
Could you kick me again? Please! It feels so nice when you do it. Youre a lot 
better kicker than my other owners. Even Deke, only he was good with a knife. 
Heres a good place. I stretched out and pulled up my shirt a little to show 
her where to kick me. My fingers felt a long bump. I looked down and saw a long 
white bump above my tummy, under my breast. How did that get there? I said.
I looked at my owner to ask her where the white line came from. But she wasnt 
going to answer me. She was pushing herself against the wall and her eyes were 
wild. She was making loud sounds that were almost angry, but more scared. She 
didnt like me, after all.
The room started getting darker and started moving around and around like my 
tummy. It was time to go to sleep. I wondered if I was going back to that bright 
round room where that lady, Miss miss miss somebody was. I was not good with 
words.
* * * *
I was so sleepy. I opened my eyes and saw lots of dark. There was someone in 
front of me, and I heard a high sound. What what
The person in front of me covered my mouth. I started to scream, then choked as 
I felt a blow in my stomach. Suddenly, it wasnt dark any more. Light came 
pouring in from all around me, and I jumped. Wait. I couldnt jump, I was in 
bed.
No I wasnt. I was back in the hallway leading to the waiting room. NO! What had 
happened? There was that noise--and did someone hit me?--and then here I was. I 
must have sharded again. Fear tickled my spine as I ran to the round room that 
held my ripes. Who was I this time? And how long would I remain that way? Though 
I would prefer being myself, I fervently prayed that it was Miss DeChant who was 
in control of my body now.
I reached the end of the hall, where the computers were, and ran by them. There 
was someone seated. Graying hair, slightly stooped shoulders. It was Miss 
DeChant. I felt a knot in my stomach. That meant that Id sharded into the 
pleasure girl. If I wasnt already slipping into the timeless indifference of 
the waiting room, I would probably have broken down. As it was, I still gasped.
Miss DeChant heard me and turned around. Though we had clung to each other 
during her--our--rape, this was the first time Id ever seen her while she was 
coherent. She had a calm face, with pretty gray eyes and a strong jaw. Like me, 
she was naked. She frowned slightly when she saw me, but didnt rise.
Mademoiselle! What are you doing here?
Ive sharded, Miss DeChant. I was hoping it was you. Unfortunately, its the 
other woman, the pleasure ripe, whos conscious now.
No, child, she is not. She is here, in my lap, the poor thing.
I stepped forward slowly and looked past Miss DeChants shoulders. Curled there, 
her head indeed in Miss DeChants lap, was the pleasure ripe, crying quietly.
But but then whose ripe is controlling my body?
Miss DeChant looked up with wide eyes and shook her head.
* * * *
Sir, I hate to disturb you. The computers voice was soft, feminine, and 
fearful. I realize you need to relax from your many duties. But Im obeying 
your request to waken you at 0430. Its that time now, sir. The voice was 
painfully apologetic. Posen groaned and rolled over, staring up into the dim 
quarters. That damned computer.
Its not 0430 yet, he insisted.
Im so sorry. I will execute internal diagnostics now to locate my problem. 
Diagnostics complete. It is 0430, sir. Shall I come back in ten minutes?
No. Im up. Please delete this wake up call and record that I awoke at my 
standard time. Override code Posen AA1AA11Alpha.
Of course, sir! The official log has been amended to show you arose at 0615, as 
normal. As normal for the log. More times than not, Lieutenant Posen did not 
arise until well after nine. Posen was not a morning person.
This morning, however, was very different. Posen had agreed to hear Private 
Hawthornes report at 0500, and he was not going to miss it. It was with great 
relish that he anticipated being told the story of Private Wyeths humiliation. 
If it werent such a messy business, Posen himself might have been tempted to 
thrash the girl.
He showered quickly in his private bath, wishing he had his full ninety minutes 
to prepare. But that would have meant waking up at 0330. It didnt matter. He 
wanted to look just right of course, but Hawthorne wouldnt be telling anyone 
about his less than perfect attire. He chuckled and began drying off.
Twenty-five minutes later, Lieutenant Posen sat down at his desk. Like every 
regimental commander, he had a combination living and working quarters, so the 
total commute time was three seconds. He sat down and prepared his greeting.
Its about time, Private. He spoke sharply and with a tone of impatience. No, 
not quite right. It was a remark, not an order. And what if she were on time?
Good morning, Private. May I have your report? No, too friendly. Distance. 
Thats what the major at the very exclusive Randex Military Academy always said. 
Keep your distance from the troops and you will keep their respect.
Report, Private. Yes, that was it. Clean, concise, to the point. Should he 
stand when she entered? He shook his head. Must still be tired to even think 
that. Of course he wouldnt stand. He was the officer, she was the dog. He 
snorted. Female soldiers! What a useless lot. Good enough for standard chores 
and for keeping the mens morale up, but generally a waste of time. That there 
were rare exceptions like Eyer only proved the rule. Female dogs. He let out a 
short laugh. That would make them bitches.
Time.
Its 0459, sir. Good. Another minute. Then ten more to get the report and 
perhaps another ten to report in turn to his superiors. He didnt even need to 
leave his quarters; Hawthorne was to return the badly beaten Wyeth to her bed 
and attempt to reshard her to her original persona. If she failed, then no harm 
done; whoever found her in the morning would have her taken to sickbay 
regardless of whatever ripe was on the surface. Either way, that little upstart 
would never know that shed been sharded on purpose. How he wished he could look 
her in the eyes and tell her what had been done to her, under his orders. That 
would take some of the punch out of her saucy attitude.
Her eyes. For a moment, Posen pictured those eyes as they were yesterday, when 
she systematically dismantled Olecki. Her mastery of him had been no fluke. Even 
after the first two exchanges, when Olecki had knocked her down, she remained 
calm, saying she wanted his measure for his safety. What followed only seemed to 
validate her statement.
And earlier in the week she had lain on the bed in the hospital and calmly told 
him--to his face!--that she would kill him if he slighted her again. Such an 
impudent girl. And in front of Cooper, no less. Yet she had been serious. Deadly 
serious. Her eyes told him that. Like Eyer, she was a female dog. A bitch.
How could a child have such an intense stare, such focused purpose? Yes, she was 
a Cue. But could that much of a persona carry over from host to host through the 
centuries? Was it possible that a half-grown woman could carry the experiences 
of an accomplished warrior? It seemed impossible! But her eyes If she ever 
discovered Posens role in this
He shook off the chill and curtly asked for the time. Damn! The woman was five 
minutes late! He had made it very clear to her that Wyeth needed to be returned 
an hour before the dampening field was turned off at 0600. He had used Hawthorne 
several times before, to rough up recruits who had ideas of enjoining the enemy, 
or to settle a score that was beneath him. She was very efficient and quite 
ruthless, a useful tool.
She was also late. Posen tried to busy himself with some routine work, but could 
not wait longer than ten minutes. Now fifteen minutes late, and with the 
dampening field being shut off in forty-five, Posen decided he had to act.
Computer, give me the location of Private Hawthorne.
There are currently two Private Hawthornes attached to this regiment. Private 
Richard Hawthorn is in the mens A Company barracks. Private--
No, you idiot! I want the location of the woman.
Private Gina Hawthorne is not inside the compound.
Then where is she?
Unknown.
Where was she last?
Private Gina Hawthorne was last reported at the primary hanger entrance. She 
left the compound at 0305.
Computer, where is the present location of Private Abigail Wyeth?
Private Abigail Wyeth is presently located in the mens showers.
Where? Posen demanded, not really intending to query the computer, who 
nevertheless repeated the information. Is anyone with her?
Negative.
Is she conscious?
This system cannot determine the state of organic life forms outside the mens 
and womens barracks.
He knew that, but had forgotten it momentarily. He sighed and opened a drawer. 
Inside was his pistol. He turned the charger on, picked up his holster, and left 
his office, heading toward the mens showers.
The corridors were dark and deserted, and Posen was able to reach the showers in 
less than two minutes. He passed inside, then waited for his eyes to adjust to 
the even deeper shadows of the showers. The indicator on his pistol was 
flickering green and red, indicating a full charge on the lethal setting. 
Thinking about it, he lowered the setting to stun. Like Hawthorne, hed been 
told the consequences of killing Wyeth. Unlike Hawthorne, he took no excitement 
from it. After a moment, the lights flickered green and light yellow. Taking a 
deep breath, he stepped around the modesty wall, leveling his gun.
There was a dark object on the floor three meters in front of him and he fired. 
It was a body, but it seemed immune to the shot, for instead of jerking, it 
merely absorbed the energy bolt. A sharp acid taste burned his gut and throat. 
Scared, Posen hastily put the setting back to lethal and cursed the slowness of 
the charge.
He was blessing it two seconds later. It took that long for him to realize that 
the reason the body didnt react was because it was beyond reaction. He lowered 
the setting yet again and approached the body carefully.
It was Wyeth. For a moment, the fear returned. She was dead! His heart raced and 
a cold sweat broke out. Wait. No, she was alive. He could make out her slowly 
rising and falling stomach. She was lying in a pool of blood, barely clothed. 
Her top was covered with blood and her panties were soaked in it. There were 
scratches or cuts along her cheeks. Hawthorne had really been enthusiastic with 
this one. She was not around to admire her handiwork, however.
Hawthorne? Posen called out softly. No answer. He called out again, then 
remembered shed left the compound. Damn! That meant that he had to carry Wyeth 
back to the womens barracks! That much blood; it would ruin his tunic. Well, he 
sighed, the price of command. Holstering his pistol, he stooped over the girl.
He was not a particularly strong man, but she was not a particularly large girl. 
She seemed even smaller now as he carried her back to the barracks. In the 
comparative brightness of the corridor, and from a distance of a half meter, he 
was able to look at her closely for the first time.
Unconscious like this, she looked incredibly young. To think hed ordered no, 
the orders had come from above. Her condition wasnt his fault. Still, to salve 
his over-reacting conscience, hed order the dampening field turned off ten 
minutes early. That would give them additional time to discover her and get her 
to sickbay.
He entered the womens barracks and quickly located her bunk. The other women 
were fast asleep. He laid the child on her bunk. Child? No. Woman. He was 
surprised that even looking like this, she had a certain beauty to her. Glancing 
around to see he wasnt observed, he leaned down and kissed her on the mouth. He 
tasted the blood on her lips, but instead of revulsion, sensed a quickening of 
his heart. He slowly pulled his mouth away, staring at her soft features. 
Feeling flushed and vaguely guilty of taking advantage, he glanced around. 
Everyone was asleep, no one was staring. He became more aggressive and leaned 
down again.
Ten minutes later, he left the womens barracks, humming slightly. The trip back 
to his quarters was quick and uneventful. Once inside, he turned the lights up 
and clucked disapprovingly at his blood-spattered tunic. Still, not too high a 
price to pay for a solid nights work. Hed carried out his orders very well and 
had even gotten an unexpected bonus. He felt like sharing his happiness.
Computer. Please leave the dampening field on an additional thirty minutes 
today. Well let the troops sleep in this morning.
Yes, sir.
A very good nights work. And still early enough for another three hours of 
sleep.


Chapter Six
Doctor Ressler shook his head slowly, and raised his hand from the girls neck. 
He reached to his left and snapped off the uv field that disinfected the 
examination table where the two men had placed the limp body. Next he switched 
off the now useless stasis field that stabilized a patients vital signs 
Finally, he pulled the white sheet up over her head, a practice that had little 
real function but had carried through the centuries as the symbolic final 
pronouncement of death.
Im sorry, sir, but the damage was too severe. Shes been dead for awhile.
Lieutenant Posen turned sharply to the two men.
Why didnt you bring her here immediately after discovering her? he demanded.
Both men were clearly upset, more from being accused than from intimidation. 
Both men came to tighter attention, and one answered.
But, sir! We did bring her here immediately. After we notified you, as per your 
standing orders, we--
Well, thats not going to help her now, is it? Posen interrupted. Following 
your precious orders may very well have killed her! Im going to see--.
Pardon me, Lieutenant. Resslers calm voice sliced through Posens tirade. 
Posens ears burned red because such a quiet voice could cut through his. But 
as I said, shes been dead since at least last night. Theres nothing these two 
could have done to change that.
Posen stared at the doctor, then nodded. He returned his attention to his men. 
Very well. Ill consider the doctors statement and determine if any discipline 
is warranted. Dismissed. The two hurriedly saluted and left. Posen turn sharply 
to me.
And what about you, Wyeth? Do you know anything about Private Hawthornes 
death?
I looked at him, then turned my head away. I didnt want to deal with him today.
Answer my question! he shouted. I ignored him. He sharply inhaled.
Please, Lieutenant! Resslers voice was not as calm or quiet as it had been. 
I must insist you refrain from exciting my patient. Private Wyeth is still 
exhausted, and the injuries from her attack are not fully healed. Speaking of 
which, he added with a careful tone, What have you uncovered so far? Its been 
over twenty-four hours.
I perked my ears to hear Posens answer, even though I already knew what it was 
going to be.
Dont take that tone with me, Doctor, Posen spoke coolly. The investigation 
is continuing smoothly. I should imagine well discover the identity of the 
privates attacker at the proper time. These things cannot be hurried. We dont 
want to miss any clues that may point the way to a solution. He sounded like a 
cheap detective novel. And as predictable as one, too. I heard him step closer 
and tap my shoulder roughly.
Now, once again, Private. What do you know about Private Hawthornes death?
The quickest way to get rid of him was to answer his questions. So I raised 
myself up on an elbow and looked at where she lay. It was the athletically built 
girl who had smiled at me my first day in the barracks. She barely looked like 
the same person. Part of the reason was that the complete relaxation that 
accompanies death tended to change a persons appearance. But the main reason 
was that a good portion of her face had been scorched and removed by a lethal 
burst from an energy gun at point blank range. I lay back down on the bed, 
careful not to pull my left leg, which lay encased in a pocketed gravity field 
while the bone knitted.
Im sorry, sir, but I dont have any idea what happened to her, I said dully. 
Just these few words were tiring. This was my second morning of my second stay 
in Resslers care, and though my wounds were more serious, they were also more 
easily tended, and I was healing rapidly. But the process left me constantly 
weak.
Thats hard to believe, Private. Both of you injured in the same period of 
time, and youre saying its a coincidence?
No, sir. Im not saying that. Im not saying anything. Perhaps the same person 
that attacked me killed Hawthorne. I dont remember anything after going to bed 
two nights ago. There was something about his closeness that made my flesh 
crawl. I turned my head to the wall again. Please, sir, let me sleep. I dont 
feel well.
Ill tell you when you can sleep, Private. You havent satisfied me yet.
A shiver went up my spine. The way he sounded made me feel dirty. I bit my lower 
lip, but said nothing. Fortunately, Ressler did.
That is enough! Lieutenant, if you say so much as one more word, I will report 
your actions in my medical log as gross negligence after consultation by a 
physician. Furthermore, I will bring that entry to TAU and demand action. His 
voice was rising steadily, but now he caught himself and spoke normally. 
Please, sir. Im asking you to leave. Private Wyeth will be able to answer more 
questions tomorrow, though I cant see how anything can be gained. Whether or 
not she chooses to answer those questions is up to her. But not until tomorrow. 
Now, good day, sir. His final tone was of such firm dismissal, not even Posen 
could resist.
Very well, Doctor. Ill return tomorrow. In the meantime, Ill post Cooper at 
the foot of her bed.
No.
What did you say?
I said no. His presence is not wanted and not needed. Ill not have an 
obvious antagonist in the constant presence of my patient. Not only will it 
upset her, delaying her return to active duty, it would be most inappropriate 
during the frequent examinations I must carry out with these kinds of injuries. 
The answer is no and will be recorded in my log as such.
Posen left, fuming, but with nothing to say in the face of such firmness. I 
turned my head back to Ressler and smiled up at him.
Thank you, doctor. You have no idea how much I appreciate this.
Youre welcome, young lady. And I think I have a good idea, Abigail. I noticed 
how tense you became when he came near you.
And thank you for keeping Cooper out of here.
Again, youre welcome. I was stretching it a bit with that, but his presence 
would have made our talking impossible.
I stopped smiling. Im sorry. I forgot youre not just a doctor. I started 
twisting the sheets with my fingers. It was nice to forget. He took my hand in 
his.
Then forget it. Listen to me. With his other hand, he gently turned my face 
back to him. I said, listen. Long before I was recruited by TAU, I was a 
physician. For the next few days, thats all I am. I have no other interest 
beyond getting you back on your feet. Theres no such person as Major Ressler. 
Im Doctor Ressler. He smiled slowly and with such care, I had to smile back.
Thank you, doctor. I needed to hear that. I closed my eyes, feeling the 
tension draining from me. I felt the gravity field diminish, and cool air 
brushed my leg.
I was also telling the truth when I talked about Coopers presence being 
inappropriate. How does that feel? He pulled gently on a toe.
Fine.
He circled to the side, pulled out a sounder and began going over the break. The 
gentle warmth the gravity sling normally provided my leg intensified until it 
was uncomfortable. I winced, but held still. He nodded.
Good. Stay motionless. Id like to extend treatment to three minutes this 
morning. He continued to focus on my leg, but carried on the conversation. 
Tell me, why did you react like you did to Posen?
I dont know. I remembered his closeness and made a face. For some reason, he 
gives me the willies.
Could it be a remainder of your experience from two nights ago?
I dont know that, either. Im sure I sharded, but I dont recall anything. In 
the past, theres always been a period when I wasnt in control of my thoughts 
and actions, but I was at least aware of them. This time, I went to bed after 
our discussion, and I woke up here, feeling like pounded mullet. It was very 
disorienting.
And scary.
Yes, I answered honestly. And scary. Its still scary. Is this going to keep 
happening to me? Doctor, am I becoming a Shard?
He said nothing, but kept working on my leg. Three minutes passed, then five. He 
seemed willing to continue treatment for as long as I could stand it. I was 
relieved he didnt answer my question. And the pain and itching in my leg helped 
divert my attention and worries.
I looked at my leg. Doctor Ressler had told me it had been either kicked or 
struck with a hard object. There was a clean break at the midpoint of the femur. 
My right leg was badly bruised as well, but unbroken. My stomach and kidneys had 
been struck and badly injured. My face and throat had been hit, but not as 
severely. Overall, the injuries were consistent with a severe beating. I looked 
over at the covered body on the other side of the room. Had she beaten me? 
Ressler caught my look.
Yes, Abigail, I think Private Hawthorne was responsible. She was a thug, a 
hired dog for Posen. Ive seen her handiwork before, and your injuries are 
similar to others that have crossed her.
But she doesnt look like
A brute? He looked back at her. No, I dont suppose she does. But neither do 
you look like a hot shot puterverse genius and highly trained dog.
I dont feel like one right now. I feel like I have no control over whats 
going on. I feel like a helpless victim.
Dont! He spoke so sharply that he moved the sounder field off the bone, 
causing me to yelp. Sorry. But I mean it: Dont give in to your fears, Abigail. 
What happened to you was not only not your fault, it was beyond He broke off 
his sentence.
It was beyond my control, I finished for him.
All right, you have very good reason to feel helpless. But dont give in to 
despair, Abigail. Once you do, once you allow despair to dictate your thoughts 
and actions, then youve started the lonely walk toward becoming a Shard. You 
must fight it.
I cant fight it, Doctor! Not when Im some soulless pleasure ripe, or a piece 
of machinery in space, or who knows what else. When I shard, I dont exist! I 
was breathing hard, close to tears.
But you can fight it when youre Abigail Wyeth! And Abigail Wyeth is worth 
fighting for. He shut off the sounder and re-engaged the gravity sling. He came 
up to me and took my hand, putting his face close to mine.
I havent had a lot of opportunity to get to know you, Abigail. He flashed me 
a smile. It seems like half the time I do see you, youre bleeding and 
unconscious. The smile faded. And Im sure I sacrificed some of your trust 
when you found out I was in TAU counterintelligence.
Well
No, let me finish. We havent had much chance to become friends. And most of 
what I know about you Ive read from dry reports, or reviewed through 
holoimages. In fact, the only reason I even opened up to you was because I 
needed to take advantage of your abilities, and to keep some sort of control 
over you. I kept my look neutral, and he smiled again briefly. Thank you for 
not contradicting me or acting surprised.
Despite these drawbacks and artificial barriers, though, I have come to know 
you, Abigail. And what I see is a vibrant, exciting, happy, lovely young lady, 
ready to make her mark on the world. Whos already making her mark on the world. 
I dont want to see that lost. Ill fight for you, Abigail. Will you?
I stared up at him in silence. I should have been suspicious of his ulterior 
motives. I should have been cynical that he wanted me for my puterverse skill, 
or as an ally in his still vague mission against NATechs infiltration in the 
179th. At the least, I should have kept in mind that he was a highly trained TAU 
agent, and could make his voice sound any way he wanted.
I wasnt any of those things. Way deep inside me, I knew he was being completely 
truthful. Womans intuition? A gut feeling? Desperation? I dont know. I do know 
that his words struck a hidden place in my heart and smashed it open. All my 
fears and worries and sadness burst out and engulfed me. Finally, finally, 
finally, it was time to let the pain go.
I threw my arms around him and pulled him down to me, sobbing into his shoulder. 
I suppose I should have said something, but the great Abby Wyeth comebacks and 
witticisms and rejoinders all took the day off, and I just cried. He held me, as 
a father holds a daughter, and let me cry. And cry.
* * * *
After I finished my three year residency at Lunar Thirty-one, Diane and I came 
back to Earth and settled in France in October of 2665. We didnt have much--
In France? But but I thought France had been destroyed during the 
Terran/Martian Wars?
Really? It certainly looked fine to me. Of course, Paris was nearly 
obliterated. If I remember my history correctly, there was a good-sized rock 
that hit northwest of the city, creating a hundred-kilometer crater. Why? Are 
you from there?
No. I--I--just know someone from there. Really, Abby? Then how come you feel 
such overwhelming relief? And why did I even ask? I knew France still existed. I 
had done several raids there with the Third. In fact, only six months ago, we 
made
Earth to Abigail.
I started from my wandering. Im sorry, Doctor.
Thats okay. He took a sip from his coffee cup, which hed brought back from 
dinner earlier this evening. If I could take that self-warming cup back to the 
twenty-first century, I could retire at the age of eighteen, sainted by millions 
of coffee drinkers.
Anyway, we struggled for a little while, always the lot of a young doctor. We 
had all of one room, over the garage of a nice lady who took a real liking to 
Diane. My practice was across the common, about a five-minute walk. We didnt 
have a hov at the time, but it didnt matter. We were a young married couple, in 
love, full of dreams.
He took another drink. I didnt need womans intuition to see the next scene.
NATech? I asked quietly.
Who else? he shrugged. A squad was chasing a Cue who had just killed one of 
their people. Probably in self-defense; that area of southern France is pretty 
tight with NATech. They had cornered him in the garage under our apartment. 
Apparently he had taken the soldiers gun, because he was able to hold them off 
for a moment. Diane woke me up when she heard the shots, then went to the 
window. She grew up in a small town in northern China, where NATech and the 
Resistance were distant things. She didnt know. I had been up late on a call 
that night and was slow to wake up. When I did, she had just pulled the curtain 
back. I yelled at her to get down.
He didnt say anything, reliving what happened next in quiet sadness. His eyes 
stared into the mug, and he remained motionless. I remained still as well. After 
a moment he smiled sadly and continued.
One of soldiers must have caught sight of her, because they threw a riot light 
on her. She threw her arms up to cover her eyes just as they opened fire. She 
didnt even scream. At least four of the first dozen hits were fatal.
The remainder of the shots ignited the house. It was an old style wooden frame, 
so the high-energy beams ripped it to shreds and the whole structure was in 
flames instantly. I wanted to go to her, even though I knew she was dead. I 
couldnt. The whole side of the house disintegrated. I raced out the door and 
around to the front. I dont know why, maybe I was hoping theyd kill me, too.
They almost did. My suddenly appearing caused them to swing their guns to me. 
But the Cue ran out from the flames just then, firing and killing one of them. 
They opened fire, and he disappeared in a wave of light and heat. His scream 
brought me to my senses and I ran back behind the burning garage. His voice 
became bitter with self-recrimination. They didnt come after me. Killing a 
citizen during a battle is acceptable. Killing one afterwards is not. Of course, 
they had one of their recbots there to verify kills for promotion, so they 
werent eager to record gunning down an unarmed man running away like a coward.
You cant possibly believe that what you did was cowardly, Doctor.
I dont now. At the time, I couldnt think of anything except that Id failed 
Diane, and that she was dead and I wasnt. You dont know what its like to be 
married and so in love, Abigail. He looked up, flushing. My apologies. Perhaps 
you do.
I shook my head. No. Ive never been married. I was still single when my 
ripings started. I was in love once, though. I still was.
The emptiness was almost overwhelming. I couldnt continue my practice, of 
course. Once word was out that NATech had destroyed my home, I was effectively 
shunned by the pro-NATech community. I didnt care. I closed my practice and 
returned to Lunar Thirty-one. There I lost myself in my work for several years.
Then, about nine years ago, I was recruited by a clinic located in Manila. I 
didnt know it, but Manila was a pro-Resistance city-state, and the clinic was 
used mainly by civilians either in the pay of or voluntarily active with the 
Resistance. Within six months, I became involved with the Resistance. Part of it 
was because of what NATech had done to Diane and to my life. The main reason was 
my closeness to my patients and their lives. They knew they couldnt win, 
fighting NATech. Yet they kept fighting. Why?
Because they knew they could make a difference, I said quietly. He nodded.
Yes. Exactly. They couldnt defeat NATech, but they could perhaps limit 
NATechs influence. I was swayed by their commitment.
How did you end up in TAU counterintelligence? I asked.
That wasnt difficult. Lunar Thirty-one is a primary microsat factory and 
launch point. They also act as the emergency backup Orbital Schematics bank for 
the Lunar Five facility. Theres a significant civilian population, but all 
medical staff are required to undergo hours of simulation of combat conditions 
in case of attack. And a doctor is an excellent prospect for 
counterintelligence. Were easily inserted into a suspect regiment. Were 
supposed to have ethics. And we are to an extent outside the unit command 
structure. He finished his coffee and stretched.
Well, enough story telling for tonight. What say we have another round of 
treatment for that leg, all right?
We were about five minutes into the intense treatment when a thought occurred to 
me.
Do you suppose I could access, Doctor? It would divert my attention from the 
pain, allowing you to continue a little longer, and I could catch Mike up with 
whats going on. He might even be able to help the Lieutenant with his 
investigation
That doesnt sound wise, Abigail. He sounded doubtful. Theres a big 
difference between having your attention diverted and being completely detached 
from treatment. Theres always the risk of having something happen in the 
puterverse that may cause your body to flinch or move suddenly.
Um. I pulled my lip, thinking. How about you put the gravity sling on my 
upper leg? That would immobilize it and still allow treatment for my lower leg. 
He still looked skeptical, so I switched tactics. Look, you and I both know 
nothings going to come of Posens investigation. Im half convinced he 
authorized my attack. We know that Hawthorne didnt act on her own initiative. 
So who used her? If I dont find out, no one will.
I can have Sergeant Eyer look into it, he offered without conviction.
Jodys a nice person and a solid dog. I count her as a friend, and her hearts 
in the right place. But she doesnt have the mind or character for this kind of 
thing. You and I do. I tapped my left leg, smiling. And youre busy. Besides, 
I wont be doing too much, just telling Mike what I want. Not only that, but--
All right! he gave up with mock exasperation. You remind me of a terrier I 
had as a boy. Hed get his teeth into a sock and hed shake it until it fell 
apart. Fine. Go ahead and access. But you must allow me to be able to end access 
if needed. Also, Id like permission to examine your other internal injuries.
Of course, Doctor. I trust you completely. Ill hold the access field to just 
my head. And Ill arrange for you to terminate my access. On impulse, I added, 
Ill go one better. Ill set it up with Mike to give you unattended full 
access.
He stared. You can do that? Give full access to someone?
Of course I can. I told you, its my world. Youll only be able to stay on two 
or three minutes, even with the shielding. But if I shard again, I may need 
someone who can communicate with Mike. So we both benefit from this. Just be 
careful.
You dont need to tell me. Ive already had one too many experiences with 
unshielded access with you. Thank you, Abigail. He raised his voice. Computer! 
Secure sickbay, TAU level clearance. Internal authorization: SR071C. There was 
a slight deadening of sound as the shields went up. He nodded at me and began 
shifting the gravity sling to my upper leg.
Access, I announced.
The sickbay flashed out of existence and Groucho and the duck showed up to greet 
me. The duck was pulling along a coffee table behind him. Despite the 
seriousness of this trip, I had to laugh.
Okay, I give up. Why a coffee table, Groucho?
Groucho looked up at me in surprise. Because I only had one piece of string. 
The duck quacked in surprise as well.
Huh? Id thought this thing up one night after being up all the previous two 
nights programming. I had been more than a little punchy, and as a consequence I 
was paying for it a year later. Despite their oddball looks, though, they were 
performing a valuable function, constantly looking for imaginative users willing 
to take a chance. I had begun sowing the fields of the future puterverse.
Well, if I had had two strings, Id have brought along the end tables instead. 
Although the idea of a duck pulling two end tables is ludicrous.
Okay, I said carefully. Now wasnt the time to continue this thread. Have you 
seen Mike around?
Yes. He knows youre here and hell be around shortly, which isnt 
surprising
Hes not that tall, yeah, yeah. You said that last month. Better work up some 
new material. He wandered off, the duck dutifully pulling the coffee table 
behind him. The sky turned emerald green, and Mike shot across the horizon. I 
waved and he bolted down toward me. He made to pass through me, but although I 
would have enjoyed a moment of cyberintamacy with him, I didnt want to upset my 
body. Instead I held my arms, and he just landed next to me.
Whats wrong? he complained. Youre not turning into a prude, are you?
No, Im not. Just access the last forty hours of the regimental logs and youll 
find out why youre not allowed in tonight.
He frowned for a moment, then shook his head.
I dont get it, Abby. Theres nothing unusual. Other than the one fatality, 
its routine. He looked at me. Was Gina Hawthorne a friend? If so, Im sorry.
It was my turn to frown. You mean theres nothing in the logs about my attack?
His eyes flared. You were attacked? Whos the bastard? Ill fry him in his 
sleep!
NO YOU WONT! I yelled. He jumped back, surprised at my intensity. You will 
never attack a flesh in retaliation. You should know better, Mike. Anyway, I 
think my attacker was Hawthorne. But shes just the muscle. Somebody ordered her 
to attack me. I quickly told him what I knew and what my suspicions were. When 
I finished, the blue flame in his chest was very visible.
Youre probably right, Abby. It sounds like Posen did order the attack. And you 
want me to find out why, right?
You got it. While youre at it, see if you can go further up the chain. Posen 
is an ass and hates me, but I cant see him risking his career over petty 
vengeance. My guess is he was also acting on orders. I paused, hesitant to go 
on, but knowing I had to.
Theres one more thing, Mike. He had already begun his scanning routines, but 
brought his whole attention back to me when he heard the worry in my voice. 
Ive had three episodes now in the last month. Im afraid I am crossing the 
line from sharded Cue over to full fledged Shard.
No! Its not true! His face was working to keep composure. One was prolonged 
by Deiley, and the last one may have been induced. Youre fine!
No, Im not, Mike. Dont worry. I intend to fight it. But there are going to be 
times when I wont be able to access when I want I need your help. I need you to 
keep tabs on me whenever possible. And I need you to give Ressler access 
whenever he requests it.
No way! This is our world, Abby. Visitors can tag along with you, but no one 
else is allowed!
This isnt a game, Mike! I said angrily. I have got to start opening up our 
world to others, or we wont be able to execute our plan. Dont you understand? 
If I die, the world will continue on. But if our plan dies, the world will 
continue on without change. Weve got to reach detonation point, or everything 
weve done is useless. Now, I want you to give Ressler access at his request. 
And, I added pointedly, I want you to protect him when hes here and give all 
the assistance you can, short of revealing our final goal.
All right, Abby. I dont like it, but I trust your judgment.
Thank you. One last thing. Ive got a present for you. Kiki! I called out.
A flower sprouted out from midair, the bud angling toward us and the roots 
spreading over much of the landscape. Blossoms started popping up all over, but 
the largest bud kept reaching toward us. When it was less than a meter away, it 
curled around until it was pointing straight up, then blossomed. Kiki was 
standing inside.
Hi, boss! she exclaimed with happiness. Then she caught sight of Mike and 
started blushing. Shed had a crush on Mike ever since the two first met. Mike 
was polite, but kept his distance, being in love with me. In my wildest dreams, 
Id have never imagined that writing programs would lead to a love triangle.
Hi, Kiki! Ive been telling Mike that Im going to be hard to reach for a 
while. Ive given access to Scott Ressler.
Oh! The doctor working with TAU? He seems nice.
He is, but thats not why Im letting him into our little club. We need to keep 
the plan going, and I might not be able to help much longer. Her eyes got wide. 
Mike will fill you in later. Right now, 1101001101 010101001000111010101101. I 
stopped and shook my head.
Whats wrong? Mikes eyes were as wide as Kikis.
I--I do110100100101010 nt kno 10001001010110101010. I covered my mouth, and 
Kiki screamed.
Abigail! Your color!
I looked at my body. My figure had become angular, and the color was fluctuating 
between yellow and steel blue. My head 11010010111001 was getting knotty and 
1101001010101 di0110m.
Geez! Shes sharding! In the puterverse! Mike jumped forward and grabbed my 
arms. I felt the pure UTC flood through me, and my mind cleared.
Kiki! Ive got to go 1101001! Did you finish the access package for Mike?
Yes. Its going to require several hours for him to assimilate, but
Give it to 11010001 him. Permission gran11010010 permis11010 Mike! Help 
me! I screamed He entered me completely. I felt a hot twisting in my gut and 
leg. My thro1101001101t clo110100101sed up. But I had to 110100110 get one 
110100101 last command out.
Kiki! Permission granted! Her eyes lit up and I saw a green diamond begin 
1101001 glowing 1101001 in h11010er che1101st. I wa1101001s lo1101sing.
end access 1010010100 0101 1010010100100101 101 1101010101010 10101010 101010 
10110 101 101010 1101 01 1011 100101 1010101 
0101010100101010011110010010010101001010101 01010 10110 101010101010 
1010101010101010 101010101011011010101101001101010 110101011010 110 
101101100101010110101010 1011001101010101001010101010101 0110010101 
1010101010101001 1010 110101
1001010100101010010101010100101010100101100100110010101 101 101011 1 110101010 
10 1010 10 1001010 001 101 10 101 1010 101 101 010101 0 100 110110 10101010101 
101 10 1My eyes snapped open. Where? Everything was clear. Did I have a 
nightmare? My leg still ached, and I felt a weight on my chest. I looked around 
the sickbay, but it was pitch black.
Doctor Ressler? I called out, trying to rise to my elbows. I couldnt. The 
restraining field was on, pinning me to the bed. Doctor? I called out again.
Hes not here, Shard. Posens voice came from the darkness. Dont you 
remember? You killed him.
Liar!
He called for the lights, and they came up until there was a dim glow from the 
ceiling and I could make out Posens form as stepped up close. Terror, stark 
unreasonable terror, rose up inside me. I forced it down.
Im not lying. Thats what my log will say, and whos to be believed? A 
respected regimental lieutenant, or some Shard? I felt a tightening in my chest 
that had nothing to do with the field.
Wheres Doctor Ressler? I demanded. Posen shook his head sadly.
Poor creature. Cant even remember your own handiwork, Shard? Here, let me 
help. Computer! Full lights! The room flared and I winced at the brightness. I 
opened my eyes and looked at Posen.
He had stepped to one side, to let me see beyond. On the examination table lay 
the body of Gina Hawthorne. Why would he show wait. The figure beneath the 
sheet was too big.
No, I whispered.
Yes, Posen corrected and pulled the sheet back.
Doctor Resslers faded eyes looked back at me. Hed been dead for hours at 
least. But it seemed only moments ago that he allowed me access to the 
puterverse.
I didnt kill him, I said weakly, almost certain that I hadnt.
Of course you didnt, Shard. I killed him. With this. He pulled out a disk, 
less than five centimeters in diameter. A handy little device. Quite top 
secret, of course. But used by a few trusted members of NATech Xeno forces. 
NATech Xeno forces were the equivalent of TAUs counterintelligence. Little was 
known about them, but it was a well-known fact that NATech units hated them as 
much as we did.
You cant be a member of Xeno, I blurted out, my anger getting the best of me. 
You dont have the intelligence or self-control.
Indeed? he tried to answer calmly, but his voice approached a shriek. I am a 
relatively new member, but they choose only the best.
Apparently theyve lowered their standards, I said acidly.
His mouth became a white slash and he walked up to me. He raised his hand to 
strike me. I turned my head and winced,
PLEASE, HIT ME HARD, MASTER.
but the blow didnt come. Instead, I heard him chuckle. I looked back at him. He 
was at my side, smiling. There was something about his eyes and smile that
No
Let that be a lesson, Shard. He brought the disk up to my eyes. Its really 
an ingenious little toy. It attaches right here. He reached for my head and 
held it against my temple. See? Now all I need to do is activate it and all 
your persona walls come crashing down. Then, I give you a few choice words, a 
key phrase, or perhaps an action, and youre sharded. Hawthorne used it on you 
just that way three nights ago. Three nights? That meant Id been out at least 
twenty-four hours.
Its only meant to be used on Shards, of course. Use it on a real human being, 
and well, it tears down barriers that dont exist. I think its called a massive 
cerebral hemorrhage. Im sure thats what Doctor Ressler would have called it, 
had he survived to diagnose his own condition.
I turned my head and looked at him with hatred.
Access.
Uh-uh. He wagged a finger at me. Well have none of that, Shard.
Stop calling me that!
Why? Its true. Or will be soon. How many times have you sharded since youve 
been here? He laughed, enjoying himself. Lets see, there was that delightful 
sex toy that Hawthorne called up. Im afraid you were too much for her. She had 
complete freedom to do as she wished, and she lost herself in it. It would seem 
pleasure ripes prove the saying that absolute power corrupts absolutely. When 
she was located two days later, shed killed herself rather than deal with what 
the two of you shared. He looked at me with admiration. Youre quite an 
intense little slut, Abigail.
I called him a vile name. That wasnt me!
Yes, it was. Believe me, I know. I felt sick. After that, you sharded into 
some sort of computer. That was easy. After stunning the good Doctor, who didnt 
have a very good alarm system in place, I just pressed this against you and 
whispered, 1101001 a few times, and off you went on another sharding 
adventure. According to my official log, it was then that you killed Ressler. 
That would have been last night. I arrived, but alas, I was too late. Weve 
confined you to the sickbay and sealed off access to everyone except myself. It 
was only now that you came out of your sharded madness. He held up the disk. 
With a little help. Sadly, youre about to go off sharding again. He pressed 
it against my temple.
I wanted to cry, to lash out. I wanted to plead. But I wasnt going to give him 
the satisfaction.
Oh, before you go, Abigail, I wanted to thank you. I looked at him, fearing 
what he was going to say, but still determined not to give in to my terror. It 
was very hard.
When Hawthorne didnt show up to report the night of your beating, I had to go 
find her. She was gone, but you werent. It was I who carried you back to your 
bed, getting your blood all over my tunic. It seemed you owed me for the 
inconvenience, so I helped myself to payment. You were unconscious, but that was 
probably for the better, seeing the effect you had on Hawthorne. And since you 
couldnt resist, it made our time together far sweeter. I enjoyed you 
thoroughly. He leaned down and kissed me on the lips, raking his teeth over 
them and drawing blood. Hot tears rolled down my cheeks.
Youre a dead man, Posen. If not by me, then by the NATech Xeno forces using 
you and your ego. Either way, youre a walking corpse.
For a moment only, he cracked. I saw the flash of fear in his eyes as the 
certainty of my statement hit him deep. Then the moment passed and he smiled his 
sick smile and shrugged.
Well, we all die. Some sooner than others. There was a push on the side of my 
head and I heard a high whine. He leaned close to savor the moment. His voice a 
harsh whisper, he said, And some die over and over. Goodbye, Wyeth. Pleasant 
dreams, Shard.
My thoughts started getting cloudy and jumpy. I felt the weight sliding off my 
chest, then felt my chest disappear, followed by my arms and legs. Soon all of 
me disappeared. Where was I? Who was I? Was I?
Pour. Press. Cool. Reset. A disembodied voice filled my being. I looked to see 
where it came from, but I had no eyes and I was nowhere and I was no one.
Pour. Press. Cool. Reset, it repeated soothingly. Why did it say that? Was it 
telling me what to do? But who was I? Was I me? Or was someone else me? Since I 
was no one, I couldnt be me.
Pour. Press. Cool. Reset, the voice said. Was that my voice? But I wasnt a 
me, I was a a
Pour. Press. Cool. Reset, I who was not me said. Pour. Press. Cool. Reset. 
pour. press. cool. reset. pour press cool reset
POUR PRESS COOL RESET POUR PRESS COOL RESET POUR PRESS COOL RESET POUR PRESS 
COOL RESET POUR PRESS COOL RESET POUR PRESS COOL RESET POUR PRESS COOL RESET 
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* * * *
Posen detached the disk from her temple and admired his work. She was staring 
sightlessly into space, barely breathing. He switched off the restraining field. 
Her arms fell to her sides, but otherwise she was motionless. He kissed the 
unresponsive mouth, savoring the taste of her blood. There was a burning inside 
him. Licking his lips with anticipation, he placed his hand on her soft leg and 
began sliding it up under
There was a crackling sound from the doorway behind him. He jerked his hand away 
and turned quickly. Three men, followed by Eyer, burst in. She looked around, 
her gun drawn, and saw Posen. Her eyes glanced down at Wyeth, then returned to 
him. Was that an accusation he saw in her look?
We came as soon as you called, sir. The door was sealed, so we had to burn 
through it. Whats the problem?
Problem? Problem? His voice tight with anger and frustration. There is no 
problem except with your breaking valuable property, Sergeant. Theres also a 
problem with your story. I did not call for help. He waved a hand at Wyeth. As 
you can see, this private of yours has sharded again. Ive decided she is no 
longer a contributing member of this regiment. Please arrange for her transport 
to that refuge town he waited for Eyer to tell him.
Glendale, sir.
Yes, yes. Glendale. I want her taken there tomorrow morning. A thought came 
and he spoke crisply. Yes, tomorrow morning. In the meantime, secure this 
area.
Very good, sir. Her tone contradicted her statement, it wasnt very good, but 
he let it slide. The sooner he got rid of her, the sooner he could she was 
still talking. Shall I post a guard, sir?
A good thought, Sergeant, but unneeded. She poses no threat to us. He looked 
at the limp girl sadly. Ill stay behind for a while though. Its very hard, 
losing such a vibrant, youthful soldier under your command.
Yes, sir, Eyer said woodenly. May I advise you to reconsider, sir? She may 
still be a threat, and it wouldnt be wise to risk our commanding officer 
unnecessarily.
What threat, Sergeant? This Shards no threat. His choice of words 
contradicted his concern of only a moment ago. Would she catch it? Probably not.
Thats what we thought last night, sir, when we found her like this after she 
killed Doctor Ressler. The unspoken word apparently hung in the air for all 
to hear.
Damn! He hadnt thought of that. Now he was in a corner. He very much wanted to 
enjoy this Shard one last night, but to do so would certainly raise the 
suspicions of an already wary Eyer. He made a command decision.
Youre right, of course, Sergeant. Very well. Lets take this one step further. 
Go ahead and He almost said dump, but caught himself. transport Private 
Wyeth to her new post. I will begin the puterwork to give her an honorable 
discharge. Carry on.
Sergeant Eyer saluted. Yes, sir. She turned and began giving out orders. Posen 
walked past them and went to his quarters, trying to figure a way to make one 
last visit to the sickbay.
When he reached his quarters, he still hadnt worked out a plan to be with 
Wyeth, but hed come up with something better. Wyeth wasnt the only Cue out 
there. He could request from TAU the opportunity to begin a riping rescue. Then, 
with a few successful raids on the biophysical plant in Nkongsamba, hed be in a 
position to explore this new interest of his. It would work nicely.
Computer. Seal my quarters. Visual, sound, entrance and exit.
Yes, sir.
Posen whirled around. Who gave that order? It sounded like his voice.
Computer, he said loudly, unseal my quarters.
Im sorry, it responded tonelessly, but you are not authorized to unseal 
Lieutenant Posens quarters.
What? he shouted. But I AM Lieutenant Posen! Stupid computer! Making a 
supreme effort to control his temper, he said, Computer. Identify me.
You are Lieutenant Randolf Posen, commander of the 179th Regiment of the 
Resistance. Service number 8T--
Yes, thats me. Now, computer, unseal my quarters.
Im sorry, it repeated, but you are not authorized to unseal Lieutenant 
Posens quarters.
Then, Posen responded triumphantly, if Im Lieutenant Posen, and only 
Lieutenant Posen is authorized to seal and unseal his--I mean my--quarters, who 
did seal them?
I did.
Posen turned again, this time facing his desk. Seated behind it, its feet up on 
the desk, was a glowing green person who looked to be no more than a teen. Its 
eyes were a brilliant green, and its gaze felt warm. Posen frowned at the 
creature, trying to look imposing. It didnt help his image when he backed up a 
several steps.
Who the hell are you? he demanded.
Close, flesh. Who the hell am I? Im your hell, Posen. Your private little hell 
on Earth before I send you to the eternal Hell. It put its feet down and stood 
up, walking up toward him. Posen backed up again, but came up hard against a 
corner.
Stay away! Ive got a gun! He pulled his sidearm.
Geez! the creature complained. You sound like a cheap detective novel. It 
laughed when Posen set the charging gun to lethal. Youre as predictable as 
one, too.
The gun toned charged and Posen pulled the trigger. Nothing happened. He pulled 
it again. Again nothing. He threw it at the creatures translucent green body. 
It was a good throw, but the gun passed through it without harm.
What are you doing here?
Hey, just following orders, flesh. Listen. It put a hand to its ear.
Youre a dead man, Posen. If not by me, then by the NATech Xeno forces using 
you and your ego. Either way, youre a walking corpse. Wyeths voice deafened 
him. He clapped his hands to his suddenly burning ears. They felt wet. He pulled 
his hands down. They were covered with blood. He screamed.
Oh, please. You are such a wuss. The thing motioned a hand and Posens screams 
cut off. Much better. You can still talk, but any screaming will be muted. It 
seemed to consider for a moment, then added, For now.
Posen didnt know what to do. He felt terror, but needed to control it. He 
forced down the bile in his throat and tried to take the offensive.
Ill ask again, creature. What are you doing in my quarters?
Could you repeat the question, Alex? It laughed. The question should be: 
What are you doing in my quarters, flesh? And the answer would be: Youre 
dying.
Posen looked around, it was still his office, though the walls were a little 
shinier than normal. And the light seemed to come from everywhere, not just the 
ceiling. But the amount of light was right.
These are my quarters.
Really? It looked around. Yeah, I guess I did do a pretty good job, didnt I? 
But tell me: Can your quarters do this? The thing raised its voice. Level 
seventeen.
Immediately, Posens skin began crawling with living, biting, invisible insects. 
The bile in his stomach came up again and wouldnt be denied. It spilled out 
onto his clean uniform. His ears continued to bleed, the deep red liquid 
splashing on his shirt and mixing with the filth already there. He slumped to 
the hard floor and looked up at his tormentor.
Why are you doing this? Stop it! Stop it at once!
Uh-huh. Thats your first wish. Sorry, but youre not allowed to make that 
wish. It looked at him, its face impassive. Level twenty-three.
The floor underneath him burst into molten lava. Posen jumped to his feet, but 
instead found himself on stubs of shattered bone and raw flesh. His feet had 
burned away. He lost his balance and fell to his hands, which disintegrated in 
an agonizing flash as they touched the floor.
Please! Please stop! He screamed, but nothing came out of his throat.
Thats much better! I never thought teaching manners would be so hard, even to 
an ass like you. Sheets of pure energy rose out of the floor, surrounding him. 
He felt himself being lifted free of the lava by another sheet. Suddenly, they 
slammed around him, encasing him. He flinched, but they didnt hurt. In fact, 
they eliminated all the pain. He looked at his feet and felt relieved they were 
back, as were his hands. He rose shakily.
His office had started transforming. It was still his office, but the walls were 
beginning to separate at the corners, and pure, blinding light was flooding in. 
His desk had turned into a bright red stone, which the creature was sitting on. 
It was looking at him with an intensity that was almost a physical blow.
Who, who are you? Posen stammered. Youre from NATech Xeno, arent you? I can 
explain.
By all means, please explain. Id love to hear about your actions. Level 
thirty-one.
Posen flinched, but nothing happened other than the walls became partially 
translucent. He looked around to the chair he always kept in the corner and 
found its replacement: a dull red rock. He sat gingerly on it, then relaxed when 
it didnt hurt. He felt slightly better. He was still at the mercy of this 
glowing monster, but if there was any talent Posen had above all others, it was 
the ability to explain away the unexplainable. It was this gift that had gotten 
him into Randex, into a commission, into good graces with both the Resistance 
and NATech. This would be harder, but still doable.
With great detail, and more truth than he thought possible, he reported to the 
Xeno creature his entire mission concerning Abigail Wyeth. He omitted only his 
independent attentions. He finished and waited. The thing seemed in no hurry to 
say anything. Finally, unable to bear the constant stare, Posen rose angrily to 
his feet.
Well? Ive given you my full report. Your orders have been carried out exactly. 
Wyeth has been forcibly sharded three times in two days, and is now on her way 
to that refuge town. Glenside, or Glenwood or whatever. What more do you want?
The creature raised a finger and Posen heard his own voice filling every cubic 
centimeter of space.
It was I who carried you back to your bed, getting your blood all over my 
tunic. It seemed you owed me for the inconvenience, so I helped myself to 
payment. You were unconscious, but that was probably for the better, seeing the 
effect you had on Hawthorne. And since you couldnt resist, it made our time 
together far sweeter. I enjoyed you thoroughly It was I who carried you back to 
your bed, getting your blood all over my tunic. It seemed you owed me for the 
inconvenience, so I helped myself to payment. You were unconscious, but that was 
probably for the better, seeing the effect you had on Hawthorne. And since you 
couldnt resist, it made our time together far sweeter. I enjoyed you 
thoroughly. It was I who carried--
All right! he yelled, barely audible above the booming sound. All right! I--I 
took advantage of her while she was unconscious.
You mean you sexually molested her. Level forty-one. The walls turned to 
glass, and Posen found himself in the middle of a vast plain. As far as he could 
see, there was a field of shimmering gold and green grass. Close by was a stream 
that was an impossible blue, shot through with ribbons of vivid scarlet-silver. 
Overhead, the sky was pitch black, but light flooded from everywhere.
It was I who carried you back to your bed, getting your blood all over my 
tunic. His voice was even louder, pushing him to his knees and causing the 
grass to vibrate, setting off a low hum. It seemed you owed me for the 
inconvenience, so I helped myself to payment. You were unconscious, but that was 
probably for the better, seeing the effect you had on Hawthorne. And since you 
couldnt resist, it made our time together far sweeter. I enjoyed you 
thoroughly. It was I who--
Yes! Yes! I molested her! But shes just a Cue! She has no legal rights or 
recourse! Why does it concern you? I carried out your orders! He covered his 
ears without effect. I wish Id never seen that damned bitch!
The self-accusing voice was silenced; the creature stood up and helped Posen to 
his feet.
Thats your second wish, flesh, and you wasted that one, too. Whats done is 
done. Only one wish left. Better use it right. Come on, up you go, flesh. Let me 
show you something. They walked a few step to the now transparent walls. The 
creature yanked Posen back.
We cant go through there. The walls would shatter. and thered be litter all 
over the place. Thats easily fixed, though. He raised his voice again. Level 
fifty-three.
Instantly the walls vanished and the plain came to life. Glowing brown plants 
sprouting blue crystal petals sprang up from the ground. The green and gold 
grass swallowed up the hard floor, and Posen felt its velvety softness take the 
weight from his feet. He felt an excitement and joy begin to fill him.
Good, the thing said contentedly. Not best, but good. Follow me.
They walked for several minutes, covering ground at a fantastic rate. Posen knew 
where he was now. They had entered the puterverse, and this creature was one of 
its programmed residents. That meant he was safe from mortal harm. Perhaps this 
was a kind of test, to see if he were worthy of promotion within NATech Xeno. 
Promotion! He began to feel embarrassment over his earlier showings of fear. But 
at least he saw a way out. The tormenting had ended when he confessed to his 
molesting of the girl. Did Xeno use sexual attack in the same manner as the 
NATech SS? It made sense.
Tell me, creature, do you have a name?
Yep. Posens ears burned with irritation when it said nothing else. He felt 
anger as well. What right did this non-living thing have to not obey him? But he 
held his tongue, remembering the shielding He was still not absolutely certain 
that he was safe.
They continued on and Posen saw the land begin sloping down. He saw for the 
first time a large river less than a kilometer away.
That cant be the Quantum! he said in disbelief.
Yes it can, flesh. Pretty, isnt it?
It was more than pretty, it was stunning. It was filled with endless streams of 
data, intertwined together until they became an unstoppable force working along 
the massive river bed. Impossibly deep shades of blue set the background for the 
more playful slivers of color that dashed in and out, carrying data, 
information, and hopes and dreams.
I never dreamed it could be this beautiful! Posen forgot where he was, he was 
so taken by the sight.
Yeah? Try this Level sixty-one! The creature called out.
Again the landscape changed dramatically while remaining the same. Blacks became 
indescribably solid, and whites blinding white. Posen was able to see millions 
of colors all around him, and could actually see them as millions of colors. His 
senses reeled from the sight and he stumbled to the ground, staring at it, able 
to pick out each one of the billion bits of data that it was composed of. Yet 
despite the near overload, he reveled in it.
Then he heard a soft sound, wafting on the breeze that came off the river. 
Unlike everything else, he had to strain to hear it. At first it sounded like a 
song. Then he could pick out words. They were his words.
It was I who carried you back to your bed, getting your blood all over my 
tunic. It seemed you owed me for the inconvenience, so I helped myself to 
payment. You were unconscious, but that was probably for the better, seeing the 
effect you had on Hawthorne. And since you couldnt resist, it made our time 
together far sweeter. I enjoyed you thoroughly. It was I who carried you back to 
your bed, getting
He smiled this time, not feeling any guilt. He understood now why he was here. 
He rose to his feet and looked at the creature, who stood staring at him, arms 
folded.
I said those words, creature. They are mine and only barely describe what I 
meant.
Then you stand by them?
More than that. I was going to act on them again. I had hoped to spend a full 
night with her. I didnt have the nerve to take her fully the first time, but 
believe me, Ive learned to--
The creature held up an arm, cutting him off.
Okay, fine. Thats enough. He seemed almost uncomfortable with Posens 
frankness, and Posen felt a sense of victory. He was now in control of the 
situation.
Good. I hope I have proven my loyalty and willingness to serve Xeno. You will 
now return me to my quarters, creature.
Just a second, flesh. Weve got one more place to go.
How much further could they go? They were at level sixty-one already, only three 
from the theoretical limit. Did NATech have this much power? A silly question. 
Of course they did.
Very well, creature. But hurry. Its been a long day for me.
Yeah, Ill just bet it has. He cleared his throat and spoke a single word.
Access. Why did that single word send an icy lance through his soul?
The thin veneer of beauty fell away from the puterverse, and Posen was standing 
in a vision. He could see things at a thousand kilometers or at a subatomic 
level. He looked at the Quantum and gasped.
It wasnt full of data. It was full of thoughts. In an instant he could see into 
everyones hopes, he could read the world as a book, or as a single life. Colors 
became emotions which in turn became sensations of reality as well as thought.
Where are we? he whispered.
Were at unrestricted access, flesh. Were in a place that is composed of pure 
unbound trinary code.
Posen snapped his head around. UTC? Impossible! Not even NATech can solve the 
unsolvable secret, can they?
That bunch of jerks? Not a chance. Posen felt the shiver in his being again. 
This time, though, that shiver was also light blue laced with green and smelled 
like bitter cold. This is Abigails world.
The words drove home with white-red razors of terror. Wyeth did this? That 
Shard? But he knew it was true. His terror faded to a dull throb of violet 
sadness. He could smell her sweet scent on the breeze. But it was a scent that 
accused him, for he had stolen his taste. The ground felt like her skin, but it 
refused him its softness, for he had stolen that as well. And the air he 
breathed was made from her laugh and joy and happiness. All things he had 
destroyed. He turned to the creature to see that it had turned dark green. Deep 
in its chest was a blue flame, and its eyes had turned to obsidian.
It had come. Something that happened to everyone else had now come for Posen. He 
should have been terrified, but he wasnt. He felt a great calm.
You spoke correctly, creature. You have given me my own private hell. I 
destroyed the person who made this, and you are now going to destroy me. He 
waved a hand. All this is a taste of something I can never have. Youve shown 
it to me to convict me. And I stand convicted. And you comfort me with my 
victims gentleness, knowing that I have come to my execution on soft wings. He 
was amazed at how poetic he sounded. Poetic justice? He smiled sadly.
You will kill me now, and I will go to Hell. I will go there with a small taste 
of what I have surrendered for my deeds. For all eternity I am doomed to know 
what I could have had. This was your intent?
You got it, flesh. Abbys my best friend. She made me. She took care of me when 
I needed it. She teaches me, plays with me, works with me, loves me, though not 
in the way I wish were possible. He turned his back on Posen, and looked into 
the Quantum. The last thing she gave me, flesh, was the ability to access 
people into the puterverse. It took a while to understand, but I managed.
What took even longer to understand was the responsibility that came with it. 
Think about it, flesh. From this point on, I can choose anyone I want and bring 
them into this world. And once they are here, all I need to do is snap my 
fingers and their life-sustaining shield melts away. Just like yours is going to 
in a moment.
Its a huge responsibility, flesh. A huge trust. But like I said, this is 
Abigails world. Not yours. Not mine. Not anyones. Its hers. So though I may 
bring people here on occasion, it wont be to execute them but to educate them. 
If Abigail survives her sharding dissolution--and I believe she will 
somehow--then well be in a great position to begin the education. Because 
NATech will be gone.
And what of me, creature? Are you to renege on your claim that you will not 
execute people you bring here?
Sorry, Posen, but you didnt hear right. I didnt bring you here, remember? 
Youre here at Abigails request. She might stop me, she might not. But we wont 
find out in time for you, because you sharded her. So I go with her last words.
The creature calling him at last by name was his sentence of death. Posen 
couldnt put it off any longer. Nor did he want to. The peace and serenity of 
the puterverse was deep inside him already, and every moment here only made his 
eternal damnation that much worse. It was time to end it.
Very well, creature. Allow me my third wish. Be quick.
Mike raised his hand and smiled. Now that, I can do. And he snapped his 
fingers.


Chapter Seven
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sight came back to my eyes and I looked around. It was dark, but there was a 
slit of sunlight that forced its way through the boarded windows and shone on 
the far wall, setting a spiders web ablaze with the color of sunset red. The 
spinner of the web seemed to be making the best of the fading daylight, and was 
busily stretching new threads onto its sticky framework, hoping to lay the 
perfect net for tonights catch of mosquitoes, gnats and flies.
I sat up. I was back in my room. Alan, or one of his people, must have 
discovered me and brought me back, laying me on my mattress. My shirt, a NATech 
issue piece of faded gray cotton, was soaked in sweat. My pants, also NATech 
issue and faded gray, were folded neatly and sitting on the crate I used for a 
dresser. That meant it had been Dorothy who put me to bed. She always took off 
my pants and cleaned them whenever I sharded. They were my only pair, and they 
needed to last until the Resistance hov snuck in with more. NATech issued one 
pair of pants and two shirts to you at official internment, assuming those who 
outlived their clothes could replace them with the clothes of those who did not. 
Underclothes were luxuries
I flipped the sheet aside and rolled onto the floor, at trip of three inches 
since my mattress lay on it, and carefully stood up. The room swayed a little as 
the blood redistributed itself, but I stayed on my feet. I went to my counter, 
where I kept a small cross leaning against the wall, and did my morning devotion 
and prayers. I had managed to acquire a Bible shortly after arriving in 
Glendale, so I was also able to do a short study. Romans 6 today, which was very 
appropriate for shards, as comforting to us as the Twenty-third Psalm.
I finished my reading and put the tired Book down and rose. I looked at my bed 
and was relieved to see I didnt have to clean up; sharding caused the bodys 
metabolism to nearly shut down, but particularly long episodes could lead to 
messy consequences. My shards hadnt reached the point where they lasted longer 
than three days, for which I was thankful.
I went to my small sink and pulled the stopper out of the bare pipe. A small but 
steady trickle of water flowed into my washbasin. The water started out hot, 
brought to high temperature from the desert sun, but became tepid after a few 
moments.
While I waited for the basin to fill, I began doing my stretching exercises. I 
didnt know who Id sharded as, but it was a fairly safe bet it hadnt been as 
Miss DeChant or the girl; my muscles vigorously protested my actions. I still 
had most of my strength and agility. What I lacked these days was endurance. 
Four months of irregular meals consuming food of questionable nutritional value 
will do that to you.
I only stretched for five minutes. By now I was completely covered in sweat. The 
sun was going down within the hour, but my room was still over thirty degrees. 
The basin was about half full, so I stopped up the pipe. I peeled off my worn 
out shirt and doubly worn out panties to wash up. Dorothy had already taken off 
my bra, to help me breathe easier during my shard.
I doled out a small amount of soap into the basin, then set it aside. Grabbing 
my cooking pot, I laid it under the pipe and unstopped it again. It began 
filling slowly. Using my shirt as a washcloth, I cleaned myself head to toe, 
rinsing with the water in the pot. Using my wash water, I then cleaned both 
shirt and panties, silently thanking Dorothy that shed already done my pants. 
Whenever I had to do them, I was stuck in my room until they dried. Walking 
around half naked in a town filled with ripers and NATech grunts was a less than 
wise idea. I wrung out my only pair of panties and put them on. My shirt I also 
wrung out, but hung up to dry since I had another.
I went to the crate to fetch my other shirt and noticed a note from Dorothy. She 
always left a note of encouragement for her charges, something to pick us up 
after the episode ended.
Rise & Shine, Runt!
You went off to la-la land about halfway back to your room. A runner found you 
about four hours later, during night patrol. I put you to bed and did the wash. 
That was yesterday. Youll need to stick your head in at quarters when you get 
back to find out how long its been since then. Oh, put a mark in the Foundry 
column. Dont stay away too long, love. We miss you! Alan and the gang say hi.
Dorothy
PS. Its now two days.
I pulled my other shirt from the crate and used it to dry off. Dorothy had 
gotten so good with shards that she could distinguish between even non-organic 
shards. My foundry ripe tended to leave my body completely limp, whereas my 
apartment, netter, orbital station and PlaNet ripes had various degrees of 
tenseness. To me, they were indistinguishable except for the soreness of my 
muscles when I woke up. I picked up a pencil and wrote a hash in the Foundry 
column on my tablet. That made ten in the last three months, more than all the 
others combined, not counting Miss DeChant and the girl. I wondered why.
I picked up my bra and put it on. It was a far cry from the marvel of 
engineering, fashion, and comfort that I used to have. It wasnt even a bra, 
really, just a length of cloth, about two meters long and twenty centimeters 
wide. The idea was not to give me support--I was only modest in the bust 
department and it didnt look like Id be getting much bigger. Its main function 
was to de-emphasize my figure and help pass myself off as a boy--at least from a 
distance. I dont know how much safer it made me; Neither ripers nor NATech 
goons cared much who they attacked. The main rule was the younger the better. 
And I was very young. But the cloth strip, snugly wrapped, at least gave me 
illusory comfort, and Id take whatever comfort I could get. I pulled on my 
clean shirt and pants, and slipped my sockless feet into my shoes.
By now the still flowing water was as cool as it was going to get. I drank my 
fill, then stopped it up. It would be another thirty minutes until darkness let 
me move around, so I tried to pass the time by cleaning my room. Since Miss 
DeChant had been out in the last week, everything was nearly perfect. In any 
event, there wasnt a whole lot to clean. So I sat down and wrote out a small 
note to her, filling her in briefly.
Id picked my room out less than three days after the 179th dropped me off here. 
It was a small office located inside one of the hundreds of gutted warehouses 
and factories that made up the core of Glendale. There were thousands of such 
little rooms, but this one was perfect. This one had been a factory, a 
monolithic building that housed the huge lathes and presses used to turn out ion 
engine casings for the starships of the twenty-third century. When they 
relocated to Orbital Station R in the twenty-fourth century, they took what they 
could and left the rest. What remained was obsolete and too bulky to justify 
moving and created a deadly maze of heavy equipment, oily surfaces, ambush 
points and long falls to the basement. And I knew the whole place. My room was 
against an outside wall that bordered an open field. It could get very hot 
during the day, but stayed warm on these cool October nights. It had only one 
exit--a weakness--but it was buried in a tiny side alley that itself was hidden 
from the street. And if an emergency came up and I absolutely had to get out, I 
had my energy pistol--thoughtfully given back to me by Jody before they brought 
me here--and could take out the wall. It would never be my home--shards never 
referred to where they lived as home in the hope that one day they would have a 
real one--but it would do.
Best of all, it was close to the Resistance Glendale base and I had a nicely 
disguised route there. It was at the base that I spent most of my time. And when 
I wasnt there, I was here. I did not move around very much. If I sharded in a 
place where I wouldnt be found by the Runners--as we called the Resistance 
patrol--there was precious little chance of my surviving the attentions of 
anyone else. I had undergone a temporary sterilization to prevent pregnancy, but 
that was the least of my worries. The last woman shard caught by ripers died the 
day after her attack. The last male shard caught by them was found dead.
I waited another two years for the thirty minutes to pass, and then it was 
finally time to go. First, dinner at the base. Then, my endurance permitting, a 
long session with Mike. The excitement inside me was almost a living thing. Just 
another few of these sessions, with Alan along as chaperone and right hand man, 
and everything that Id been through and been put through would pay off. I 
quietly closed the door to my room and picked my way to the outside.
* * * *
The corporal had just finished his third canteen of water of the day when the 
subdural signal behind his ear pinged. He put down the canteen and lifted his 
rifle. The gun was fully charged and lethal up to one kilometer, provided the 
shooter was good enough. The corporal was a great deal more than good enough. He 
squinted through the night sight and looked at the only exit from the shards 
room.
She stepped out carefully, a slip of a girl with long hair tucked into her 
shirt. Hed been warned over and over to always be careful and never take her 
for granted. If she discovered his presence here, hed be dead within the hour. 
He never doubted it. Hed been working around shards and Cues for twenty-six 
years, and the first lesson you learned was never underestimate them. So when 
she looked across the open field in the general direction of the warehouse where 
his elevated sniper nest was, he became completely motionless and made sure to 
not look directly at her. Rumor had it that shards seemed to know when they were 
being watched, and again he didnt doubt it.
He looked casually back at her through the sight and felt a small relief to see 
the back of her head. Although she was over two hundred meters away, he was 
confident he could punch a neat hole through her skull with a quarter-second 
burst. He was the best in the squad, and his squad was the best in the region. 
He watched her as she picked her way through the trash-strewn alley before 
disappearing around a corner. Putting the rifle down, the corporal reached for 
the fourth canteen and waited in the darkness for the soft tone to go off again.
* * * *
It took me thirty minutes to make the trip to base, twice as long as when I was 
more myself. I had to rest several times and wait for my muscles to stop 
quivering. In a way, this was the worst part about sharding: those few hours 
after an episode waiting to get my strength and wind back. Over the past month, 
that time seemed to be getting longer and longer. No matter. Another week or two 
and I could take as much time as I wanted to recover. But first I pushed off 
from the pile of crumbled masonry Id been resting against and went on.
Five minutes later, I dropped down the last flight of stairs and walked through 
the grungy door. There was an easier entrance, but it was more exposed, and used 
only for emergencies. Shards that still had some control came this way.
Alan, where he always was when not on the streets, looked up from his terminal. 
I was on a platform a floor above him, but the ceiling was easily ten meters 
high, so we were in the same room. A large smile came across his tired face when 
he saw me.
Hello, there! Glad to see you up and about. He narrowed his eyes and looked. 
Abigail, right?
Uh-huh. Miss DeChants still in bed. Once she learned how to move around, Miss 
DeChant started using this route. The girl did, too, but everyone I talked to 
said they could tell in an instant when I was the girl. Miss DeChant and I were 
more difficult to tell apart. Until we talked, that is. Apparently Miss DeChant 
had a very recognizable French accent.
I went down the steps along the wall to the lower floor where Alan was. He stood 
up so he could catch me when I jumped into his arms. I gave him a huge hug and a 
kiss high on the cheek, about the only place his beard wasnt. He set me down 
and mussed my hair. He seemed like a big brother to me. He smiled one of his 
endless smiles and jerked his head toward the kitchen.
Theres some soup and fresh bread in the kitchen. Help yourself. Dorothys over 
at Hoc and Chivs place, but shell be back in an hour or so. Shed love to see 
you.
And Id love to see her. Uhh, could I ask you to get me some soup, Alan? You 
and I need to get a bunch of stuff done with Mike tonight, and if I walk in 
there, Miss DeChant might walk out, and that would really throw a wrench in 
those plans.
Youre going back on so soon? Is that wise, Abigail?
No, its not wise at all. In fact, its downright stupid. Thats why you come 
along, Alan. So I dont have to pay for my stupid mistakes. But things are 
reaching a head and Im on a schedule.
And the schedule is he prodded.
Six more days as me should do it. Probably nine or ten days over all. I want to 
be in the best shape possible when we cross. I snatched a roll from his soup 
plate and shoved it in my mouth. Rude, I know, but he was done and there was no 
point in wasting food. Is the equipment in yet?
Dont talk with food in your mouth. Uh-huh. It came in yesterday. We needed you 
to calibrate it, though, so its still in its retropressure crating.
Cool. Ill start work on it after were done in the puterverse. I walked to 
the back room where we kept our best access point, still chewing on the bread.
I stepped through the inner door and into level twenty. Mike kept a permanent 
gate in this room, and only Alan and I were allowed in. Truth to tell, only Alan 
and I could come in, and stay conscious, even though level twenty was not a 
prime number and therefore easier than nineteen or twenty-three. Having it at 
level twenty helped in two ways. It gave Mike time to slap shields around Alan 
before we went total, and it was an effective, but not fatal, deterrent for 
anyone who wandered in here. Mike hadnt given me a lot of details on Posens 
last few seconds of life, but the picture was still pretty clear; I wouldnt 
wish that kind of agony on anybody.
Thinking of Posen, I realized I hadnt thought of him much in past months. When 
my induced sharding episode ended, I was already in Glendale. It was another 
week before I could access. When Mike told me hed carried out my sentence, Id 
felt a flash of satisfaction that Posen was dead; but as the days passed, Id 
come to feel remorse as well. Was it my place to pass a death sentence? Yes, it 
was. He was a traitor, under the same sentence of death when caught. And hed be 
unable to impose his wretched will and ideals on the 179th. But despite all 
that, and despite everything he had done to me, I took no pleasure from his 
death. It was needed, and was carried out, quick and without intention to 
torture. There was nothing to be gained by punishing beyond what was needed. The 
Bible said an eye for an eye, but many people didnt understand that God was 
saying just an eye for an eye, and no more.
I shook the cobwebs out of my head. Keep your focus, Abby As I said, I walked 
into level twenty when I passed through the door. A quick glance around showed 
me it was our favorite spot near the Quantum. Sunk down near the bank, the black 
barriers that were present even at this level were hidden from sight. The only 
large landmark was the partial span that reached over the Quantum. Mike was 
leaning against its massive, ancient base.
Hey, kid. He gave me a big grin, much the same kind that Alan gave me, and 
held out his arms.
Hiya, pervert. I gave him a big hug and clung to him for a long time. It was 
these moments that I ached for. With Aaron gone, and my life stampeding toward 
inevitable dissolution, I found it easier to think of the fantastic. I had 
wondered once if I could fall in love with a cyberbeing of my own writing. I 
knew now that I could. Through everything, Mike had been there for me. Mike and 
Kiki. How could I not love them both?
He pulled me away, but kept an arm around me. He lifted my chin and gave me a 
quick kiss on the lips. Soft flickers of plasma raced between us. Hed changed 
so much since the last package of coding Id given him. He took his execution of 
Posen, and his new powers, very seriously. I closed my eyes and kissed him back. 
Warmth, love, peace, and security flowed over me. And healing.
I leaned my back against him, still wrapped in his arms, and we stared out 
across the Quantum. The far side looked darker these days. Or was that just my 
imagination? The calm before the storm? I sighed.
What is it, love? Mike asked softly. He was still a first class jerk. And 
thered always be a little leech in him, I suppose. But like now, he could be 
very sensitive. Not that Id ever tell him that. Hed brush it off and say 
something crude. Although, maybe not. He had changed a lot, even to projecting 
himself taller, to better protect me.
I was just thinking of my past three years, Mike. So much has happened.
And so much more to come. He added.
I suppose. At least for the next week or so. After that My voice tapered off 
and I sighed again. Mike, I sharded as the foundry again.
That makes ten times in the last three months. he said thoughtfully. More 
than the all the others combined, not counting Miss DeChant and the girl. I 
wonder why.
Thats what I thought. My guess is that its the most basic of the ripes. Or 
the most repetitive. According to what we dug up, all I did for over 130 years 
was--
You mean, all it did for over 130 years. Mike corrected gently.
All right. All it did for over 130 years was repeat the same basic set of 
instructions. A false persona isnt supposed to cross the riping barriers, but I 
wonder if something so repetitive can leave a deeper mark leave a ma-ma-- I 
started sobbing.
Hey, hey, Abby. Settle down. He gave me a reassuring hug. Lets not talk 
about that now.
Oh, Mike! I began crying. I dont want to die! My lifes not much, but its 
mine! And I dont want to give it up yet! Theres so much to see and do and 
experience! Does it have to end now?
Yes. Yes it does. He said unsympathetically. I jerked away from him angrily. I 
turned on him, my fists clenched.
You jerk! How can you say such a mean thing?
Its not mean, Abigail. Its true. If you follow every documented case of 
sharded dissolution, youll be dead in a few months. Maybe only a few weeks.
I couldnt believe my ears. And I had thought he was sensitive. I started 
pounding on his chest.
Stop it! Stop it! Dont say those things! I couldnt stop crying now. He 
grabbed my wrists and pulled my face close to his. He held me like that until I 
looked into his pale green eyes, so empty, yet so full of expression.
Fine. Ill stop it if you stop it. I stared back at him and stopped 
struggling. He let my wrists go, but I didnt move. I just kept staring at him.
Abigail, I know whats coming, and its tearing me apart. But its like you 
said to me when I didnt think it fair. You said, Youre right, its not fair. 
Deal with it. And thats what Im saying to you. Deal with it.
Weve been looking for an answer to this dissolution for a long time. Ive made 
over six trillion searches, trying to put together just the right combination to 
find a cure. I havent found it. I havent stopped looking, either. I still have 
hope. And so should you.
In the meantime, we have work to do. Work you have devoted yourself to and work 
you created me to do. If your Maker is only going to give you three years, then 
lets use it wisely. That book He wrote, the Bible. In it He said, So do not 
worry, saying, What shall we eat? or What shall we drink? or What shall we 
wear? For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows 
that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all 
these will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for 
tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of it own.
Michael! I said, in shock. How in the world?
He shrugged, betraying his pleasure with a slight grin. I have access to 717 
translations, plus the original Hebrew and Greek, and I know how much value you 
put on what He has said and done. I dont know if I have a God. If I do, I hope 
your God is mine, too.
Ruth.
Eh? He said. Oh, from the Old Testament. Yeah, I guess so. Anyway, take those 
words to heart, kid, and lets live with whats already ours, and not worry 
about whats not. He groaned. Oh, man! That sounded so lame!
No it didnt. I giggled at his smirk. Well, maybe a little. But, it sounded 
nice, too. I gave him a big, shameless kiss on his mouth. Okay! Im better 
now!
Thats nice, said Alan, walking up behind us. So, what did I miss?
That, Lieutenant Lockwood, I laughed, is none of your business.
* * * *
Worms! Three seconds, Abby! Mikes voice yelled through the solid data-rock. 
Move your pretty little butt!
I need twenty! Alan! I called out. I was lying on my back, both my arms buried 
inside the memory conduit that was in turn buried in the pitch-black rock.
Got it, Abby! Alan jumped down to the surface to engage the worm, leaving me 
to concentrate on the data-mine. These things were tricky. If I didnt direct 
the packet burst exactly right, the rerouting would be flawed and a valuable 
link would be lost. Worse, invaluable lives would be hurt. This conduit was a 
primary pool used for organizing the medical databases on three continents. It 
had a split picolink back-up, which would kick in less than one billionth of a 
second after conduit failure, but I had already taken care of that one. Id also 
mined the migrated dynamic imprint. I couldnt afford to leave a single trace of 
NATechs presence left after detonation, or like a virus, it would grow back.
I heard loud explosions as Alan dealt with the worms. From the sound of the 
patterns, he had chosen to imitate a surge failure. On the outside, it would 
appear as though the worms had received too much power and had begun tracking 
themselves, which inevitably left a big mess. Mike would already be mimicking 
the surge at the lower access levels. They made quite a pair. I turned my 
attention back to where it belonged.
The rock faded away and I could partially see the mine. It was now completely 
filling the conduit. Everything looked hazy because we were on level nineteen 
and I didnt want to enrich the data stream with UTC. That really would cause a 
surge.
Give me a seven-way indicator, please. Obediently, seven lights appeared, 
showing the proper alignment of the mine. I rotated it while shifting the top 
edge back. Five lights began flashing. I pulled it down. One light went off, the 
other two flashed, for a total of six.
Phase drift ascending from negative twenty-five until unit lock. The mine 
tingled in my hands, then became hard again as the seventh light started 
flashing. Bingo.
Set and activate in five, four, three I took my hands away, and the conduit 
disappeared as the rock became opaque. I rolled onto my stomach and dropped down 
through the lower rock to the battle area. I could stand to work off a little 
steam.
I fell clear of the roof of the cavern and saw Mike and Alan duking it out with 
not one but three worms about five hundred meters below me. A fourth one lay in 
pieces, its glowing guts painting a nearby black barrier a light gray.
Mike had one, Alan another, which left one for me. I was in free fall, so I shot 
out my wings to gain some maneuverability. I didnt play around with my 
feathered ones, though. This was for real. Steel rods, razor sharp along the 
leading edge, telescoped up and out from my back. The wings crackled with power, 
sending out blinding light from their molecule-thick surface. I went into a full 
power stoop, aiming myself at my worm.
It looked up at me, its massive smooth face looking vaguely human. Worms were 
extremely powerful programmed creatures. This one was easily ten meters long and 
three meters thick. In fact, it looked more like a grub than a worm. Since this 
was its domain, it could draw power straight from the ground, and use that power 
for both shielding and weapons.
None of that mattered. It fired three shots at me. The first two hit my wings 
and were absorbed. The third bolt I caught with my hands. I quickly analyzed the 
power modulation and adjusted my signature to nearly match. I then used the 
energy to form a two-dimensional plane which I projected out about one meter in 
front of me.
I hit the worm at full speed. Since my energy signature was almost, but not 
quite, matching, I didnt pass through. I sliced through. My plane destroyed the 
worms shielding, then penetrated its tough hide. Flying straight into it, I 
felt a tugging on my wings as they split the thing wide open. Such was my speed 
that I continued into the ground several meters before I could stop, making a 
nice sized crater. I scrambled to my feet and hurriedly went aloft. Not out of 
fear of counterattack but out of fear I was going to get its guts all over me. 
The sense of smell was greatly enhanced in the puterverse, and at times like 
these, that was a curse. I climbed quickly and did manage to avoid most of it. 
It lay in two pieces, its insides dribbling over my craters edge and filling it 
with goo. Disgusting.
I went to help Mike and Alan, but was disappointed to see they didnt need any 
help. Mike was casually frying his with a blazing green plasma jet, and Alan was 
tidying up after setting off several implosion bombs inside the worm. Alan 
really had a knack in the puterverse, and Mike genuinely liked him. Id been 
worried when I first introduced them; Mike was not fond of flesh other than me. 
But I neednt have worried. They had met earlier, and Alan had impressed Mike no 
end. And Alans easy way in our world only increased that impression.
The battle was completely over by the time Id landed again and cleaned off my 
wings. Mike walked over to the crater to admire my work. He leaned over and took 
a big sniff.
Mmmmm, whats for dinner, honey? He kicked a piece of still quivering worm 
into the hole and walked back to us. Alan was next to me, stooping ever so 
slightly. Id brought him up pretty quick through the levels, and the shields 
helped. But nobody could be expected to perform like this without adverse 
effects. I squeezed his hand and slipped him a shot of UTC. His form, a kind of 
orangish brown, intensified.
Hey! None of that stuff! Mike protested. I dont need to see you two doing 
kissy face. Geez! Next thing you know, youll be--
Cork it, Rickles. Its just a little go-go juice. Weve got a long way to go, 
and without Alan here, youd be forever making messes Id have to clean up.
Alan took a deep breath. Thanks, Abby. I sometimes get carried away. Always a 
fun time with you and Mike, but always a little draining. He stretched and 
yawned. Where to now, Mike?
Well, lets see. Mike looked off into the distance briefly. Abbys got these 
conduit mines running smooth. Less than one chance in 400,000 any of them will 
be discovered. Weve already finished the hyperidor trajectory core system. And 
we have to wait until tomorrow to get at the NATech ground supply mainframe. 
That makes the Toronto tertiary power grid unit next, with the central European 
weather nets after that.
No.
Mike and Alan looked at me expectantly.
How about I show you our entry point? Id been wanting to share my final plans 
with them, and now seemed as good a time as any.
What about our schedule? Alan protested, but mildly. Id clearly piqued his 
interest in seeing how we were going to cross.
Thats one of the best things about being a woman. I said. Women
can always change their minds. Mike finished. Alan, dont even try to 
change her mind. Ive never been able to. If she says were going to see the 
entry point, then thats where were going. Unless she changes her mind again.
Who am I to argue? conceded Alan, winking at Mike. Ive tried several times 
to change a womans mind, and Ive ever accomplished was to get her mad at me. 
Im with you, Mike. Better the safe route and just give in.
Men! I stamped a foot. I cant believe you two, sometimes! Its not that 
different a change. Besides, you both want to see it, dont you?
Sorry, maam. Alan said contritely, sneaking a poorly concealed grin at Mike. 
See? Nothing but trouble.
Mike shook his head sadly. You really should know better, Alan.
Arrggh! It was just one change! What was the big Oooh! I popped out my 
feathered wings and took off quickly, leaving them to catch up. To think I used 
to be a man. I would have never been that rude!
I heard Mikes jets catching up to me. I sped up and smiled to myself as I arced 
across the pitch-black puterverse sky. There were, I admitted, far worse 
companions. And few better friends.
* * * *
There it is. I announced proudly.
This is it? Mike didnt even try to hide his disappointment. This was 
sludge-covered pile of garbage that stood at least four meters high. It showed 
no glow whatsoever, meaning the data was long, long dead. Of course, the stench 
would have told anyone that from half a kilometer.
Are you sure, Abby? Alan asked. He was struggling to keep his enthusiasm, but 
it wasnt coming off too well. I admit that its repugnance alone would drive 
away the curious. But how could it be an access point to the far side of the 
Quantum?
Here, let me show you. I raised my voice. Kiki!
Kiki showed up in her flower, as she always did. This time however, it was a 
pretty sickly looking blossom, and her attitude was less than bubbly.
Eeeeewww! Whats that smell? She looked around and quickly located the source 
of stench. Oh. The Quantum headwaters. She looked at me accusingly. This is 
not a place to bring a lady, Abby!
Uh-huh. So what does that make me, Kiki? I said with a laugh. Comn. I want 
you to show the boys what weve found.
Okay. Ill need a sec to build the slider, though. All this gunk is going to 
make it tougher. She raised her arms, and a small piece of ground rose up 
through the sludge beneath her, glowing a dim white. While Kiki was busy, I 
turned to Mike and Alan.
About four months ago, while I was still at the 179th, I gave Kiki a few things 
to do. One of them was to refine and embellish the unilateral accessing code Id 
written for you, Mike. Another was to build the routines for your shields, Alan, 
although I didnt have anyone precise in mind to use them at the time. But Id 
seen how high level access affected Ressler and Jody with my shields, and I 
needed improved models.
And the third thing was to find this. I waved a hand at the pile of yuck. Are 
you ready, Kiki?
Yep! Ready when you are, boss! Programming always brought out the best in 
Kiki.
Great. Go ahead, girl. She clapped her hands once and raised them above her 
head, like a conductor about to lead the orchestra. The analogy was apt: Her UTC 
coding was a work of art. I motioned Mike and Alan close.
Hang on, gentlemen. Its going to get cozy for a minute or so. Kikis going to 
take us down to level one. I shot Mike a look. And you keep your hands to 
yourself, pervert. He grinned and took my hand, Alan taking the other.
We had huddled together for only a moment when huge black walls appeared at 
about one hundred meters and began racing toward us. As they approached, we 
could hear a rumbling. Some sophisticated security walls also used sound to keep 
people away. It was even possible to disrupt a low-level access with sound.
Our level access was far from that though, so it was only annoying. We reached 
level one, and the walls were now touching, encasing us. It was still very 
bright, though; Mike and I gave out more than enough light. I felt the hard 
vibrations of the wall as it pressed at my back and snuggled closer to Mike, who 
shifted his position to better hold me. Despite my occasional warnings and 
threats about keeping his hands to himself, Mike always seemed to know when to 
mess around and when not to. And he definitely knew how far he could go without 
making me uncomfortable. An odd mix of playful rogue and thoughtful gentleman. 
Or was it playful gentleman and thoughtful rogue?
Right now, I had to yell to be heard above the teeth-rattling hum, this looks 
like a single wall. Since no one can enter the river, and its impossible to 
gain a height higher than the wall, theres no way to tell how thick it is. Or 
that its hollow. I pointed toward the heap. See? Its buried by wall. But 
watch this! Kiki, start working us up. You know where to stop.
Kiki began moving us up through the levels, announcing each one as we entered 
it. By level three, there was enough room to move around, although the pile of 
muck was still entombed in one of the walls.
It started appearing by level seven, but the walls did not actually begin 
separating until level twelve, which I pointed out.
Were at level twelve. Less than one percent of the population is able to reach 
this high. But it isnt until now that you can squeeze between the walls.
Nothing much more happened for a while. The walls had disappeared by level 
eighteen, and everything was back to normal two levels later. Kiki kept taking 
us up, but the landscape remained static. Finally, Kiki lowered her hands and 
turned to us.
This is it. Were at level thirty-one.
Im afraid I missed something, Abby. Alan offered.
Not yet you havent, Alan. Until now, this place has been pretty normal, except 
for the stench. Now lets go to level thirty-two. Kiki? She raised her hands 
once more.
The pile of muck came to life. Mike jumped back, and his hands began to shimmer 
with plasma. I motioned him to watch. The mound continued to twist and grow. 
Soon, it stood nearly three meters high and had taken on a cubish form. It 
stopped groaning and stood there, a massive pile of filth that was obviously 
covering a small structure.
There it is, I said triumphantly.
Wow, thats incredible, Abby! Mike said with excitement. Youve got your own 
pile of self-growing slime. How proud you must be.
Get with it, Mike. Kiki actually spoke sharply to him, a first. Cant you see 
its a back door?
A what? Mike and Alan said in unison.
A back door. Kiki explained patiently. In the early centuries of computers 
and cybernetics, many programmers would build an unauthorized access port, then 
bury it somewhere in the system. That meant that the programmer could gain 
access to her work anytime she wanted to. And no security system could spot it.
Why isnt that done today?
Because the security systems of today can root out any non-unbound trinary code 
procedure. Kiki smiled sweetly. Theyre called worms, Mike.
He shot her a dirty look. Well, duh. What I meant was, Why havent the worms 
snooped out this spot?
Two possible reasons, Mike, I answered. First, we dont know that the worms 
arent locating and reporting this. Maybe its just being ignored by the people 
its being reported to.
That would mean that this is a NATech port, right, Abigail? Alan asked, not 
quite believing it himself.
I think you already know the answer, Alan, and youre right; its not a NATech 
port. Not a known one, at least. That would mean the first reason is wrong. 
Thats what I think. The second reason the worms cant find it is that this 
structure predates all the worms. Here, look at this. You, too, Kiki. I havent 
shown you this yet.
I stepped forward and burned off the muck from two of the walls and the door. 
Holding a fireball in my hand to provide light, I pointed to the detailed work.
Look. Here, here and here. See the wall bindings? Look at the code riveting and 
the cross-stressed subroutines. And see the entrance portal? Theres a five-step 
entry program thats kept separate from the system initiation sequence, to 
prevent corruption and back-surge forced entry.
Alan chuckled. Im sure you three find that very interesting, Abby, but I 
havent a clue about what youre talking about. Remember? Im just the hired 
muscle here.
Dont feel bad, Alan. Mike piped in. Im missing it, too. I have access to 
every single piece of information available to the puterverse, but Im feeling 
like a kids tabinal. He looked at me. What are you yakking about?
Hacker. I sneered with mock derision. You should treat programming like an 
art. Know the masters before you, Mike, and youll learn where youre going. 
Ill bet Kiki knows, dont you, Kiki?
Kiki had walked up to the structure and projected a flower up about halfway. She 
was running a hand over the design, as though it were a sacred thing.
Young. She whispered, caressing it a little longer, allowing the codes to flow 
over and under her fingers. This is Chris Youngs work, she repeated firmly.
WHAT! Alan exclaimed. You mean the puterverse creator? Can something that old 
still be useful?
Hey, Im standing here, Alan. I said dryly.
Im sorry, Abby. I didnt mean it that way. Besides, you and this port are two 
different things. He stepped up and inspected the door. Where does it go?
Under the river.
All three turned to stare at me and I smiled.
This portal is the only way in the entire puterverse to cross the Quantum. Im 
positive. Thats the only thing it can do, really. Why else would it be here? 
And you know what that means, right?
By their expressions, they didnt know what it meant. I pointed over the Quantum 
at the dim light on the distant bank. That means that the far bank has been 
inaccessible and under very specific and very restrictive control for over six 
hundred years. Long enough that it proves it was Chris Young who designed it 
that way.
I dont understand, Abby. Kiki said. Why would Chris Young build anything in 
the puterverse for such an evil purpose?
It probably wasnt evil at the time, Kiki, Alan answered for me. And while 
moral evil is absolute--or should be--many other actions are seen as evil only 
because of current political climates. What we see as dictating our lives and 
society may not have started as such. Like NATech, who may still be behind 
this.
It may be NATech. I agreed, In fact, I believe it is NATech. So far as I 
know, Chris worked only for NATech. It wasnt the kind of organization you ever 
left. But its going to be a splinter of the overall organization, working 
completely independently of the NATech we know, and almost certainly without 
NATechs knowledge.
In essence, a shard of NATech. How ironic. Alan said with a slow smile.
Thats not irony. I said. Thats justice.
* * * *
Four hours later, I was pawing my way through the pulled-apart packing that the 
variable mass simulator had been shipped in. Youd think theyd pack carbonized 
titanium bolts in their own package, and not just slide them into their 
uncharged holes. Just because a crate isnt supposed to be turned over during 
shipping doesnt mean it wont be turned over. I had jumped into the thick air 
packing and was swimming my way through it, trying to find the missing bolt, 
when Alan came in carrying a tray. He set it down and walked over, peering over 
the chest-high crate. Chest-high to him. Head-high to me.
You really shouldnt be pawing around in that muck, Abby. They say that heavy 
air packing can cause serious rashes on some people. It isnt safe.
For your information Alan, science long ago determined there was so much stuff 
in the world that was harmful to you, they figured the best thing for you to do 
was to starve to death. I felt the heavy, two-kilo bolt brush against my leg 
and fished it out. Besides, it wouldnt be too healthy to turn on a mass 
simulator with one of these missing. Here, help me out of this, would you?
He took my extended arm and boosted me out of the crate. Outside the containment 
field, the heavy air quickly broke down to a normal nitrogen/oxygen atmosphere 
and dissipated, the extra electrons sending sparks out from my legs and torso. 
My figure shifted from a cloudy blob back to its normal curvy, bumpy self. Alan 
nodded approval.
As Mike would say, hubba, hubba! or some such crude remark.
Now dont you start, too. I complained, reaching for my shirt. I still had my 
wrap on around my chest. I pulled it on and left it loose to help keep me 
cooler. Ive got nothing extra that you havent already seen before. Why must 
men always give everything a sexual overtone?
A gross and unfair exaggeration, young lady. If I told you once, Ive told you 
a million times: dont exaggerate. He smiled. And dont tell me you were 
immune to a beautiful young womans charms when you were a man?
I dont recall and its none of your business, Lieutenant Lockwood. I smiled. 
Anyway, I have to admit that experience on both sides of the gender gap have 
shown me that we ladies arent as prim and proper as many of us may lead you to 
believe.
Ahh! I suspected as much! He didnt sound too surprised.
Now Ive let out the secret. Try not to share it with too many men. We women 
have our mystique to maintain, you know. By the way, I added, sizing him up 
head to toe. Youre not too bad looking yourself. Especially with that roguish 
beard of yours.
He laughed and slid the bolt into its powered hole. There was a low hum as the 
bolt magnetically soldered itself in place, followed by the units 
self-activation once the cyclical self-diagnostics determined it was within safe 
operating parameters. The display kicked on and a holo panel appeared. Alan took 
a quick glance at the readouts.
So, how long to calibrate?
I picked up the anti-ionic rag and began wiping off the remnant heavy-air 
molecules that were attracted to the simulators charged surface. I shrugged my 
shoulders. Dunno. We need the highest possible tolerances, so Ill want to 
calibrate to within at least a ten-nanosecond phase shift. Id prefer a 
three-nanosecond. Maybe six hours. Maybe twenty. Depends on how much vibration 
it was submitted to during manufacture and shipping, and how close to the ion 
engines it was stored. I wont really know until I open it up. In the meantime, 
Ill probably just spend another hour or two wiping off the heavy air. That 
stuff is worse than silly putty in your pajamas.
I know what pajamas are, of course. But whats silly putty?
You mean its actually gone? I thought it was self-breeding. Its a soft 
substance that children used to play with. I spent more than one Sunday 
afternoon transferring the color newspaper comics onto a handful of the stuff.
Color newspaper comics? He waved his hands when I opened my mouth. Never 
mind. You have a tendency to explain one ancient thing with another. Youd never 
get started on the simulator. But Id wager you do have time for a little 
dinner.
I tossed the rag onto the simulator. I sure do! Smells good, too! What is it, 
split-pea soup?
Very good! He said admiringly, pulling the cover off the tray, revealing a 
bowl of steaming soup and a hunk of fresh bread. Enjoy!
That wont be hard. Dorothys a great cook. I took an appreciative sniff of 
the soup. Although if she were to add a little more pepper and perhaps a touch 
of--
Abigail! Alan said sharply.
I jumped at his hard voice, then caught myself. I couldnt dwell too long on 
food preparation, or Id be guaranteed to shard as Miss DeChant.
Sorry, Alan. Thanks. I sat down and said my dinner prayers quietly. I started 
digging in while Alan left me alone to eat.
I was tempted to linger over the soup, but had a lot to do tonight. I ate some, 
then picked up the end of the loaf and took it with me and began dusting down 
the simulator. By now, the heavy air molecules had gathered enough to blur some 
of the edges. I began brushed them off, filling the rag, then shook it out. The 
de-ionized cloth helped break down the molecule structure of the air. It was 
tedious, repetitive work.
At least I had something to think about. With this simulator, Mike would be able 
to better link this room to the puterverse. I had long suspected there was 
something more to puterverse access than a virtual link. True, our bodies 
remained motionless in the physical world--I chose not to distinguish it as the 
real world because to do so would mean the puterverse was not real, nor 
anything in it--but there was a toll on those bodies. Whether that toll was 
because the puterverse was slightly hostile to our physical bodies or whether it 
was merely involuntary reactions to imagined stimuli was unknown. I suspected 
the former. Mike didnt scare Posen to death, he executed him.
By improving the link through external support like this simulator, the physical 
toll was reduced. At least for Alan. The puterverse had absolutely no physical 
effect on me. I didnt know why, but I was beginning to have an idea
I took a big bite of bread and started brushing off the base of the unit. I was 
nearly finished. The bread had cooled by now, but was still very tasty. Trust 
Dorothy to bake it just long enough to bring out a crispy
crust that locked in the wonderful yeast smell. Shed learned that from me a 
couple months ago, though she was nearly as good to start with. Heaven knows she 
had enough practice, cooking for all those shards. We very much appreciated her 
efforts.
I stood up and looked around. Where was I? I sighed sadly. Abigail must have let 
her thoughts drift again. I looked down at the rag in my right hand and the 
piece of bread in my left. Only moments ago, it had been a freshly cleaned bed 
sheet I was folding for Dorothy to take down to the Room. Of course, those 
moments may have been days or weeks ago. I looked at the machine Abigail had 
been working on. I had absolutely no idea what it was or what it did. There was 
some sort of display on the top, but what it meant was quite beyond me.
I folded the rag and placed it on the machine. It would be best not to disturb 
it. Abigail was a gifted young woman and knew far more than I ever would about 
technology. I ate the final bite of bread, and looked for the tray of food. 
Picking up the napkin, I wiped off my hands.
My middle felt cool, and I noticed my shirt was not tucked into my pants. 
Embarrassed and more than a little nervous, I carefully straightened it out and 
tucked in the shirt. Next to feeling guilty about taking over Abigails mind, 
this was probably the most difficult thing about sharding. She was a fine girl, 
proper and demure by most accounts, although she tended to be a trifle careless 
about both her appearance and her modesty. I recognized that I was at the base, 
which meant Alan had certainly seen her stomach and naval. Quite unladylike, 
though understandable, I suppose. She was young and very attractive. I had been 
both at one time, myself, and though my riping makeup precluded my ever wanting 
to be a showoff, I remember feeling a small amount of pride in the way I turned 
a mans head forty years ago. More precisely, four hundred years ago. Now, I had 
the body, but not the mind to find such things desirable. Far better to serve 
quietly and efficiently. I picked up the tray and headed to the kitchen.
Dorothy was pulling out another of her endless loaves of bread from the oven 
when I walked in. She smiled at me, then noticed my shirt. She kept smiling, but 
I noticed a small flicker of disappointment in her eyes, for which I bore her no 
grudge.
Oh, dear. She must have gotten caught up in my food again.
Oui, Mademoiselle. Either that or cleaning. She had a dust cloth in her hand 
when I woke up. How long have I been gone?
Seven days, Miss DeChant. Abigail came back for four days, then she sharded as 
the foundry, coming out of it just today. Its about midnight now.
I shook my head sadly, my eyes becoming wet. Only a few hours this time? It is 
so unfair, Dorothy. I have had my life. It seems that she should have an 
opportunity to celebrate hers, without me intruding constantly. Such sadness.
Dorothy put an arm around my shoulders. Dont blame yourself, Miss DeChant. 
Its not your fault. You are as much a victim as Abigail.
Not true, Mademoiselle. She is a real person, my soulner. Im just a construct, 
the image of a mans dream, a man dead now for centuries.
Youre being too hard on yourself. Were the same age, Miss DeChant. We have 
many of the same experiences. Whos to say which is more real than the other? 
Ill not make that judgment. If you are my inferior, you cannot disagree. If you 
are my equal, you will not disagree. And if you are my superior, then that is 
its own proof.
I smiled, cheered by her words. I appreciate your comfort, Dorothy. Merci. I 
began to fill the sink. Well, let us not waste time. You finish your bread, and 
I will begin work on these dishes.


Chapter Eight
It must have been early morning, judging by the slight chill, when I awoke the 
next day. I had stayed at the base assisting Dorothy for several hours before 
returning to Abigails room. Perhaps it was my room as well. I had made changes 
to it since Abigail selected it four months ago, and she had kept them. She had 
even written me several notes, thanking me for keeping the room so clean. But 
since there was only one person living here, it seemed silly to call it our 
room.
I rose to my feet and pulled the sheet from the bed to wash it. The pillowcase 
was not very clean, so I removed it as well. I went to the kitchen area and 
removed the stopper from the water pipe to fill the basin. I then set to the 
task of cleaning the room.
How a child could live in such a place was difficult for me to understand. I 
know she made an honest effort to keep our living quarters clean, but she missed 
so many of the little things that it generally looked like a well-taken-care-of 
mess. She had hung up her other shirt on the line, but it was bunched up and 
even in this dry air was still damp in a few spots. There was a note to her from 
Dorothy that had been left out. Beside it, a note Abigail had written to me. 
Even the cooking pot looked as though she had not rinsed it out. All this in 
just a few hours. I had never been like this! Of course, I had had no choice; I 
was a conscientious housemaid from the moment they began riping Abigails mind, 
implanting my programmed psyche into it, which they then put into a young body 
not unlike this one. What she lacked in domestic skill she more than made up for 
in other areas. I couldnt flit about the puterverse like she could, nor work 
with such complicated machinery as she did. Between the two of us, we made a 
good team. For not the first time, I wished we could have the opportunity to 
meet and talk in a place other than that horrid little room. Which reminded me 
of her note. I picked it up and opened it.
Hiya, Miss DeChant!
Its October 21st, 2679, so if youre reading this, you probably havent missed 
too much. Im heading over to the base to fool around in the puterverse with 
Mike and Alan. My project is coming along nicely and I hope to take it to em in 
a week or so.
Dorothy washed our pants out yesterday or the day before. (I think I was out for 
two days as the foundry, but I havent foundry out yet.--ha! ha!--) If youre 
looking for something to do, and you always are, were out of bread. We dont 
want the girl to get hungry and wander off in broad daylight, so if you get a 
chance, bake up a loaf or two. Id try to cook some, but Id either ruin it or 
shard into you anyway, so youre nominated.
The place looks great! I cant thank you enough. You take such good care of me I 
feel spoiled. Youre the best roommate a girl could have. Franks got a 
housekeeper ripe, too, but she freaks out every time she sees himself and 
doesnt do anything except run around well, never mind. Im sure youre not 
too interested in gory details.
Im kinda rambling on here, huh? Just killing time until dark, partially. But 
its also partially to help you know me. Its so hard to believe what weve been 
through together, yet we still havent really talked to each other. (I dont 
count the round room; were just not ourselves in there, right?)
I better finish up. I just want to let you know how much I love you and wish we 
could be real roommates. Maybe even sisters. Id like that a lot. Anyway, take 
care and God bless you.
Love, Abigail
I sighed and smiled. The girl was a treasure of a soulner. I was a very 
fortunate ripe. But it was time for this member of the team to do her work. I 
straightened the shirt, placed the notes with the others on its small shelf and 
used the collected water from the basin to rinse out the pot. I picked up the 
bag of food Dorothy had graciously given me and began preparing a bread dough. 
As I blended the ingredients, I thought of the third member of our little team, 
the girl.
From the moment we had met in the room I had thought of her as nothing else. I 
had been told that she and I were together nearly two hundred years. I had been 
alone, not counting the computers, for over 150 years. Again, so I was told. 
There was no real passage of time for either of us. It may have been several 
hours, it may have been several millennia. It may have been both. In either 
event, it was a lonely time for us. She spent all of it satisfying her carnal 
needs, and I I wasnt sure what I did.
And now we were both free for the moment and perhaps forever. For if Abigail 
died, we would die with her. Until then, though, we contributed as best we 
could. For the girl, that was precious little. Since she was illiterate, we 
could not write notes to her the way we wrote each other. Dorothy tried to teach 
her some rudiments, but the girl had no interest. And as bad as Abigail was in 
keeping the room clean, at least she tried. The girl paid no attention 
whatsoever to it. At least she kept herself fairly clean. And since the three of 
us shared Abigails body, that was probably the most important.
The bread was ready for rising so I turned on the ancient stove. I depressed a 
switch on the backplate for several seconds, then turned on the burner and oven. 
It was a necessary addition Abigail had added for our safety. If either she or I 
sharded into the girl or one of the computers when the stove was on, we ran the 
risk of causing a devastating fire. We also had an extremely limited amount of 
solar biogel to produce the methane we used as fuel If we completely drained the 
tank sitting on the roof, it would kill the microbes in the gel. So cooking was 
limited to two hours each day. Fortunately, the gas could collect for several 
days before the pressure valves would begin releasing the excess, so if I wanted 
to cook longer, I only needed to restrict cooking for several days to build a 
reserve. Of course, with winter coming soon, cooking would be cut back even 
further.
The basin was full, so I poured a portion into the cooking pot and put it on the 
burner. The oven was warm, so I turned it off and placed the bread in it, 
covering it with our only dish towel. It would be ready in ten minutes, an 
incredible accomplishment from my time when yeast needed nearly thirty minutes 
to rise. I lifted the basin clear and washed my hands under the small trickle of 
water from the pipe. I then stopped up the pipe and replaced the basin, adding a 
gentle soap. Now was the scariest part of the day for me.
I double-checked to see that the door was locked. It was, but I always checked. 
There were no real windows, only boarded and blocked openings above my head that 
let air circulate, but allowed no one to peer in. Satisfied that I was not being 
spied upon, I prepared for my bath.
Since my raping at the hands of Major Deileys men, I had become like this. In 
France, serving Professor LeClaire, I had always maintained proper attire and 
modesty. But I was never self-conscious. Over the forty-one years I was his 
servant, there were several times when he had inadvertently seen me naked. 
Nothing ever came of it, nor was I upset. I was indifferent, which was what I 
had been carefully designed to be. Even in this century, when that woman Ellen 
had wished to force her sexual attention on me, it had left me unmoved save for 
a small discomfort that I was not being used properly. Yet now it was so very 
different. The smallest sound put me on edge, a flashing shadow set my heart to 
racing. My identity as a woman, even a manufactured woman, lay in shreds. Even 
the appreciation of acknowledging the beauty of my body had been taken away from 
me. And I was beautiful. My first body had been functional first, handsome 
second. This one was a magnificent blend of beauty and function.
For a wonderful moment, I forgot myself. Pulling off the last of my clothing, I 
looked at myself in a piece of backed glass that served as a mirror. Propped 
against the wall, it was large enough to let me see a fairly good image. And 
what I looked at was marvelous. I found it much easier to appraise myself since 
I thought of myself as only a guest, though a welcome one. This thing of beauty 
was really Abigails body.
She was of small build, little more that a meter and half tall and certainly 
less than forty kilos. Her frame was small, yet strong, and despite her poor 
diet and distressing living conditions, she kept herself wonderfully fit. Her 
overall form was far more than a childs but still less than a womans. Two or 
three more years would address that area. Her beautiful hair was long, though 
she hid it under her clothing in an effort to play down her gender, which was a 
wise precaution. In loose enough clothing, she could probably still do it; her 
bust was healthy but not pronounced. I stepped closer to gaze at the face I had 
come to know so very well.
Like her body, she was an attractive mix of child and woman, with the woman 
being the dominant. Her hazel eyes had an intensity that was not from me. 
Indeed, peering into my eyes, I could see that it wasnt only me who looked 
back, but her as well. It should have been most distressing, but was not. I had 
already come to know her through her notes, her friends, and through that one 
brief and eternal, terrifying and strengthening time we shared together, inside 
her mind, outside the room, wrapped in each others arms and fighting off our 
attackers.
These eyes should have been filled with sadness, yet they were not. They still 
had joy sparking in them, a happiness not warranted but nonetheless yearned for. 
And these eyes showed as windows into a soul that had a deep well of hope, a 
well that would not run dry because the source was not from inside, but from 
without.
There was a click as the stove burner shut itself off. I went to the stove, 
mildly surprised I hadnt jumped at the sound. I think that looking into 
Abigails eyes had helped. I was not the shy animal Id been only moments ago. 
Yet another thing to which I was indebted to her.
Indeed, feeling the playfulness of youth, I decided to be daring and punch down 
the dough before dressing. My practical mind justified this by saying that I 
should take proper care of my bread, or it would not be as good as possible. It 
was fooling itself only. I knew that I chose to do it because of the flush of 
excitement and daring that came with the thought.
Feeling very relaxed and light, I pulled the dough out and turned it onto a 
lightly floured surface. It was a trifle tough, so I decided to add water. I 
filled the cup with a hundred milliliters or so and set it beside the dough. I 
poured a few drops onto the dough, then pressed down, turning the dough into 
itself. I repeated the procedure several times, pour, press, turn. Pour, press
COOL RESET POUR PRESS COOL RESET POUR PRESS COOL RESET POUR PRESS COOL
air woke me up. I was lying down on the floor, and my hands felt strange. I 
looked at them and saw they had hard stuff on them. It smelled like bread. Maybe 
Miss Deshard had been making me bread and some got on my hands.
I stood up and saw I was naked. That was why I had felt cool. But I wasnt 
really cool. Just a little. I thought I should put some clothes on.
I found the clothes. There were some panties, but they wouldnt keep me warm, 
and there was no one who wanted to take them off me if I wore them, so I didnt 
put them on. The pants would keep me warm, so I put them on. I saw the shirt on 
the line and the shirt on the table and didnt know which one to put on, so I 
put on the one on the table.
After I put it on, I remembered that Dorothy wanted me to always wear that long 
piece of cloth for a bra. So I took off my shirt and put it on. But it wouldnt 
stay on so it kept falling off. Dorothy had shown me how to put it on, but I 
forgot again. A long time ago I had learned how to put on a regular bra, but 
this was too hard. I folded it up and put on the shirt again. I found the shoes 
and put them on.
Then I remembered that I was supposed to put the panties on, because Id been 
told to. So I took off my shoes and then my shirt and then my pants. Then I put 
on my panties and then my pants and then my shirt and then my shoes. Only my 
shoes werent on right, so I took them off and put them on right.
I was thirsty, so I got a drink of water. There was water on the stove but it 
was still hot. So I pulled out the thing on the pipe and drank some water. There 
was some sticky stuff that smelled like bread on the table. That meant that Miss 
Deshard was here before me. I tried some, and it was good, so I ate some more, 
then drank some water.
I wanted to go to the base, but it was still light outside. Dorothy and Alan had 
said that I could never go outside when it was light outside or they would be 
unhappy. They werent my real owners, but they were very nice and they told me 
what my real owner wanted. Her name was Abigail, and though I never saw her, I 
knew she was my real owner. Dorothy and Alan had showed me some paper with words 
on it that was from Abigail, and they told me it said I should do what they 
said. So I tried to.
I didnt know how long I would have to wait. Until dark. I sat down on my bed on 
the floor. I started to touch myself, but stopped when I remembered Dorothy had 
told me not to do that because Abigail didnt want me to. I was sad because I 
couldnt, but happy because I did what I was told. So I just sat still and 
waited.
* * * *
The corporal looked through the night sight toward the distant doorway. He saw 
it swing open and the girl come out. Her shirt was on loosely and she had a 
streamer of cloth in one hand.
So she was now the pleasure ripe. Hed been told what to look for, that there 
were only three ambulatory personas, counting the real one. The real one was the 
cagiest, but this one had a perception that went beyond the other two No sooner 
had she stepped outside than she turned and stared directly at him. Even in 
pitch darkness, at a distance over two hundred meters, and him hidden in a 
well-built blind, she somehow knew. Without fear, she began walking into the 
field, directly toward him.
The first time it had happened, hed been genuinely spooked. Since then, he 
realized that she had no idea how to act on her knowledge. She had the mental 
capacity of a small, mildly retarded child. She was not a threat.
Nonetheless, he turned off the sight and quickly lowered the gun. Putting his 
back to the wall, he stared intently beyond the fallen-in roof far above him and 
into the starlit sky. He began to count off ten minutes, constantly fighting 
down the fear that she would somehow appear directly behind him, coming through 
an opening ten meters above the ground, having transformed into a hideous 
creature. It was an unreal fear, he kept thinking. But her ability to sense him 
was also unreal. Unreal and terrifying.
He waited the ten minutes, then took position again, turning on the gun sight.
She was gone. Now the real danger began. Of the three, this one was by far the 
most careless. Although it had not happened yet, she was almost certain to 
attract the wrong attention. If he, and she, were lucky, they would be after the 
ripes possessions as well as her more immediate and obvious rewards, and would 
follow her to her room. The implanted tonal behind his left ear would give 
warning, but he didnt trust it to give sufficient warning. He would remain 
crouched over his rifle until dawn or until the girl returned. He had a very 
high regard for duty.
* * * *
Dorothy! I pounded on the door, then remembered I wasnt supposed to do that. 
I stopped.
Dorothy! I yelled louder because I had stopped pounding on the door.
The door opened and a man grabbed my arm and pulled me in. He seemed excited and 
mad at me, but not really.
Do you remember what Dorothy told you? he said.
Yes, I do! I said, happy to answer a question I knew. She said that I wasnt 
supposed to pound on the door, so I didnt. I held out my bra. Can you help me 
put this on? I forgot again.
No, no, Miss. Now he seemed scared. Remember? Only Dorothy knows how to put 
it on. Leave your shirt on and Ill take you to her. Okay?
Okay.
He took my hand and we went through the building. He was a nice man even though 
he wasnt Alan, so I cuddled up to him as we walked. He told me to remember the 
rules about that, so I just held his hand. They had a lot of rules.
We walked past some more people and some machines and some floating machines and 
some more people that were dressed the same and then some rooms. Then he took me 
to another room and then we went past some more people until we were in the room 
where Dorothy was. It was a kitchen, like Miss Deshards but different.
I was very happy and ran to her to kiss her. She moved her head and let me kiss 
her on the cheek instead. She was surprised to see me I think.
Back so soon, child?
Uh-huh. I handed her my bra. I forgot again, Dorothy. Can you show me how? I 
undid my button to take off my shirt. Dorothy stopped me and talked to the nice 
man.
Thanks, Wally. Ill take her from here.
Yes, maam. Thank you, maam. He sounded very happy to say thank you. He went 
away and Dorothy scolded me, but with her nice voice.
What am I going to do with you, child? You dont let anyone see your special 
places except me. Understand? I nodded and she smiled and took the bra out of 
my hand. Good. Now say that.
I only show my special places to you.
Very good, but not quite. You dont show them to me, you let me see them if I 
need to. Try again.
It sounded like the same thing, but I tried again. I only let you see me if you 
need me. I thought a second. Can I show myself--no, I mean--can I let Alan see 
me if he needs me?
She looked a little upset. No, child. Alan doesnt want to see you. Im sorry, 
thats not right. Alan does want to see you, but Alan doesnt need to see your 
special places. Understand? He wants to see you, but with all your clothes on.
Why?
Because he likes all of you, not just your special places. Those are only for 
your owner, Abigail.
And you, Dorothy. I said proudly, happy to get it right.
Close enough. She sighed. Abigail and me. Now lets go into my room and get 
this put on proper.
She put my bra on me and showed me how, then let me do it. I did it three times, 
then thought I would remember. Then I ate some food. Then we went to see Alan.
He was real busy on a machine, but stopped to talk to me and Dorothy.
Hello, Princess. What brings you here tonight? I liked it when he called me 
princess. They told me a princess was a special girl from a long, long, time 
ago, and when I behaved myself, I was a princess.
I wanted to see you and Dorothy. And I was hungry, too. But now Im not.
He laughed and talked to Dorothy. Straight and to the point. Not unlike Abigail 
in that respect. Dorothy laughed, too, so I laughed, too, happy they laughed.
Shes a charmer. Despite all the bad things, shes a charmer.
That confused me. What bad things? Ive had lots of good things. All my owners 
were good things, and all the things--
Thats enough, Princess. Lets just think about these good things, all right. 
Alan said with a smile. He was so nice, I wanted to hug him, so I did. He let me 
hug him, but only for a little time. He kept his arm around me and talked to 
Dorothy.
Im a little pressed for time, Dorothy. I wasnt expecting Abigail to, umm go 
away so quickly and we need to get this simulator calibrated. Abigails a lot 
better--
Wheres Abigail? I asked. Is she here? Can I see her?
Dont interrupt, Princess. Abigails not here, though I wish she was.
I do, too.
I know that. Now let me finish talking to Dorothy. He let me go and went back 
to talking to Dorothy. They started talking big, which meant I wasnt supposed 
to listen. I went to look at the machine that Alan was working on.
It was big and had a lot of lights on top of it. I think Alan said it was 
Abigails, which made it special. I tried to see if it would say anything about 
where Abigail was, but I didnt touch it. I was always scolded when I touched 
machines. Then I remembered that some machines talked, so I asked it where 
Abigail was. It didnt say anything so maybe it didnt know either. I asked it 
if it missed Abigail, but it still didnt say anything.
But, Alan! Dorothys voice was getting loud. I have got to get down to the 
Room. Im afraid were going to lose one, and I want to be there to help.
I understand, Dorothy. Alan was always quiet when he talked, but sometimes his 
quiet voice still sounded big. But Abigails schedule is pushing pretty hard, 
and if I can get the bulk calibration complete, it will be that much easier when 
she gets back.
Is Abigail here? I asked, excited and hoping to see her.
Remember, child? Dorothy said in her soft scold. Abigails not here now.
Oh, yeah. I forgot. Im sorry.
Thats all right. Dorothy looked at Alan. So what do we do? I cant have 
anyone else watch her, and I dont want to send her home like this. Not without 
an escort, and the runners wont be going to that area tonight But I have to go 
to the Room..
I want to go to the room, too, Dorothy! If Dorothy wanted to go, then I did. 
I want to help you.
Thats sweet, child. But you dont want to go to the Room.
Yes, I do! Besides, then youll know what to do with me.
Dorothy thought about it and looked at Alan. He shrugged his shoulders. What is 
there for her to see thats worse then whats happened to her?
Dorothy put a hand on my cheek and stroked it, which made me feel very good. But 
her face was sad, so I was sad, too.
Youre right, Alan. Its so hard to look at such an innocent face and think of 
the pain shes had.
Ive had lots of pain. I said, happy to talk about it. The best kind is the 
one that makes me curl up and want to sleep. Only I try real hard to stay awake 
because-- Dorothy put her fingers over my mouth, so I started to lick them. She 
pulled them back, and I remembered I wasnt supposed to do that.
Im sorry! I forgot again! I wont do that any more. Im sorry!
Shush, child. Dont worry about it. Thats just the way you are. All right, why 
dont you come with me and help in the Room.
She took my hand and I waved at Alan.
Bye, Alan! Were going to the room! He waved back but didnt say anything.
We walked out of Alans big room and into kitchen. Then we walked down a hall 
and to some stairs. The stairs went down. We went down the stairs and then went 
into a long room with big tall walls, and some doors were there, too. It was 
very dark. There were a lot of people sitting all around and lying around and 
some were standing. Some of the people had fires, and some didnt.
Is this the room, Dorothy?
No, child, its not. This is the hallway.
It doesnt look like a hallway, Dorothy.
Its not really a hallway like you see. Its used to be a big long hall that 
had machinery called an assembly line. They made other machines that were used 
in space. But the assembly line and machinery are all gone, and now we call it 
the hallway. People who are going to go into the Room soon stay in the hallway. 
The Room is down this way.
We walked down the hallway that did not look like a hallway and we walked to a 
doorway that was kind of big. There were people standing outside and Dorothy 
went up to a nice looking man.
Hello, Gary. Ive got a guest with me tonight.
Gary looked at me, then looked at Dorothy.
Are you sure thats wise, Dorothy? I think were going to lose a couple 
tonight, and you know what its like. He looked at me again. Youre liable to 
scare the girl.
Im here to help! I said in a loud voice and stamping a foot. Dorothy smiled, 
which meant I did the right thing. I laughed because I made Dorothy happy.
You heard her, Gary. I dont think well change her mind. Shes a pleasure 
ripe, so I dont think theres anything that scares her.
All right. Go on in. He opened the door for us. I smiled at him with my best 
smile and tried to kiss him, but Dorothy pulled me away. We went inside.
It was dark inside but there was a little light. I could see people lying down 
on the floor. There were more than five and they were all sad. Some were making 
sad sounds and some were making clicking sounds.
Why are the people all sad, Dorothy?
Because they are all dying, child. A couple are very close to death.
I know. I pointed to a lady in the corner and a man on the other side of the 
room, against a wall. That lady and that man will die tonight. I pointed to 
another woman who was staring at us. Shes going to die tomorrow. Maybe the 
next tomorrow.
How how do you know that, child? Dorothy spoke in a whisper that was scared. 
I was unhappy because she sounded scared.
Im sorry! Did I say something wrong? Tell me what to say, Dorothy.
No, no, child. Dont blame yourself. Her voice sounded better. Im not mad. 
Im surprised. You are right about the first two. But how did you know?
I shrugged my shoulders. I dont know. I just did. Is that why theyre sad, 
Dorothy? Because they are going to die and wont be able to serve their 
masters?
Is that what you think?
Thats why Im sad about dying. The lady that kicked me and kicked me in the 
bathroom was very nice. I pulled up my pants leg. See? She broke my leg here. 
But when she kicked me in my tummy, I was afraid I was going to die and then I 
would be sad because she couldnt kick me any more. I thought for a second. 
But I guess she could kick me after I was dead, right? But only for a while. 
After I was dead for awhile, I would start falling apart. I was with a dead 
person for a lot of days once a long time ago, and she fell apart. My owner--he 
was a big man with a lot of hair--wanted me to be scared, so he made me
I was talking and talking and then I saw Dorothy was crying. I was sad because I 
talked too much.
Im sorry, Dorothy! I didnt mean to make you cry. I was talking too much. I 
put my hand on her face and wiped her tears. She kept crying, so I kept wiping 
her tears. Then I remembered she held me close to make me feel better, so I 
tried to do the same, even though she was bigger than me. I started to move my 
hand to her wait. I wasnt supposed to do that. I put my hands on her back and 
patted it.
She stopped crying in a while and smiled at me.
I thought I knew you, child, and you go and surprise me. Im very proud of 
you.
Oh! Thank you, Dorothy! Am I helping now? I felt glad. I liked making people 
feel good, even when I wasnt doing it the normal way.
Yes, you are, child. Now let me introduce you to someone. She took me over to 
the lady in the corner who was going to die tonight. The lady was staring at me, 
but I knew she didnt see me. Her arms were very stiff and I could tell she was 
thirsty.
Shes thirsty, Dorothy. Can we give her some water? Would that be helping?
Yes, it would. In fact thats the only thing left to do to help. Giving her 
water and waiting with her.
Waiting until she dies?
Yes. Can you do that?
Yes! I said, happy to be able to do something I knew how to do.
All right, then. Sit next to her and Ill bring some water. Pay close attention 
to her, child. Sometimes she will want to talk, and she wants someone to be 
near.
Okay. I sat down close to the lady and stared at her.
Dorothy brought some water, then went to sit next to the man who was going to 
die. She wanted me to pay close attention to the lady, so I did. The ladys body 
kept changing and she was hurting a lot. I gave her water a couple of times, 
when her eyes looked right and I knew she was looking at me.
Some time went by, then I felt Dorothy touch me on the shoulder.
Why dont you take a break, child.
Im okay, Dorothy. I want to help.
But youve been sitting there without moving for over three hours. You must be 
tired.
Im okay. You said to pay attention until she died, so I will. I promise.
But it might be hours before I looked up at her, not understanding, so she 
smiled. All right, child. But if you need someone else to sit with her, just 
tell me.
All right. Dorothy went back to the man and I paid attention to the lady.
After two more drinks, I saw her eyes become alive and she was looking at me.
Mona! Is that you? Have you come to be with me?
Im going to stay with you, lady, but my name isnt Mona. Here, drink some 
water. Youre thirsty. I gave her some water and she drank a little.
Thank you, Mona. It tastes so sweet. Do you remember me?
I thought about it, then shook my head. She seemed sad that I didnt remember, 
so I tried again, but still forgot. She patted my hand. Her hand was very bony 
and there was a lot of skin on it.
So youre not my Mona right now. Thats all right. My names Ellen. Whats your 
name, darling? Her voice was soft with death.
I dont have a name. She seemed sad, so I had an idea. But Alan calls me 
Princess. Thats a special girl from a long, long, time ago. If you want, you 
can call me Princess.
That made her happy. All right, then. Ill call you Princess. Her eyes got 
very big and they went away and she made loud croaking sounds. She didnt know I 
was here anymore, so I just waited.
She went very stiff, then her body went very dead-like. But I knew she wasnt 
dead because she wet her bed and clothes and her chest went up and down a little 
bit Then her arms started jumping around by themselves. Then they lay still and 
she cried and cried, making little shrieks. She said, Wilson, fire back 
two-thirds! a lot, and Hurry and get it off him! Nooooo! a lot, too. And she 
made some other sounds. Then she came back after a long time and looked at me. I 
gave her more water.
Am I going to die soon? She said in a little voice.
Uh-huh. Pretty soon. I remembered what Dorothy had asked me, so I asked her. 
Does that make you sad, Ellen?
Does it? I dont know, Princess. Ive been dead for eight years now. Maybe when 
Im really dead, Ill and then she was gone. So I waited
Then after another long time, she started going very stiff and her eyes stopped 
being bright. White stuff that didnt smell nice came out of her mouth and her 
nose started to bleed. She was very, very thirsty, but I couldnt give her any 
water because her mouth was closed. The white stuff came out of the holes in her 
lip where she had bitten through. Her blood was pink and runny. It wasnt as 
dark and sticky as mine was. I wondered if she was going to come back and call 
me Princess again.
Her body went all quiet and she was dead. Only then she wasnt dead. I knew her 
body wasnt going to let her insides go. Her body went stiff, and then she died 
again. Then she started making croaking sounds and died again. Then her arms 
started moving around by themselves and she died again. Then she looked at me 
with her dull eyes and she died again. And then her body became very very very 
tight and I heard some bones cracking inside her, and she died again. But this 
time it was the last time, and she wasnt going to call me Princess any more.
Child? It was Dorothy, and she was next to me. I stood up.
Hi, Dorothy. The lady is dead.
I know. I saw.
Her name was Ellen. She called me Princess. Did the man die?
Yes, he died about five hours ago.
Oh. Is that a long time?
She looked down at the dead lady whose name had been Ellen.
To some, child, its an eternity.


Chapter Nine
Major Deiley?
Deileys eyes came open at once. His mind awoke nearly as quickly. He was in bed 
and the computer was calling to him.
Yes?
You have a priority alpha call waiting for you in the puter study. The caller 
did not identify himself and could not be identified.
Thank you. Please prepare a mint tea with lemon.
Very good, sir. There was a barely audible click as the system returned to 
monitoring mode.
Deiley wasted no time dressing for the call. He was not a vain man and knew that 
whoever would call at this hour wanted to speak to him, and not a uniform. He 
drew on a robe over his pajamas and walked to his living room. At his entrance, 
the computer accessed him into the puterverse and placed him in his study. 
Instead of a desk, there appeared a terminal. That meant it the call was from 
Far Bank, his ultimate superior. He stepped in front of the terminal He did not 
salute, for both he and Far Bank considered it a waste of time in this setting.
Yes, sir?
You have in your compound a shard named Abigail Wyeth, Far Bank said without 
preamble.
Yes, sir. He was not surprised about the reason for the call.
Her other named human persona is Miss DeChant, Far Bank prompted flatly.
Yes, sir. I have placed a twenty-four hour guard at her quarters. Full report 
available, of course. He gestured with his right hand and a tabinal appeared. 
He glanced at it briefly. She is currently sharded as the pleasure ripe and is 
at the Resistance base.
You have not attempted to neutralize this base? it asked without accusing.
Quite the contrary. I make it a policy to never interrupt their operations. It 
allows for the smooth nature of Glendale to continue. Attacking a base providing 
me a service has no merit.
Very practical. You have contacts within the base?
I have three, sir. At the moment, none of the three has had direct interaction 
with Miss Wyeth. One has spoken to the pleasure ripe shard.
And the shards progress toward dissolution?
Deiley glanced again at the report. Her sharding incidents have increased 
substantially in the past three weeks. Weve confirmed eight episodes and 
estimate an additional four to six. Its difficult to project a dissolution 
time, but judging by the individuals mental toughness, outside support, and the 
nature of the false personas, my people estimate four months until dissolution, 
with an error of six weeks on either side. I apologize for the vagueness, sir.
Apology unwarranted. Far Bank replied. You are personally involved with the 
Miss DeChant ripe.
How Far Bank had discovered this was irrelevant. That it was discovered was very 
relevant. Deiley did not try to calculate how much to divulge. He had 
anticipated this event and had already prepared a response. It was not possible 
to deceive Far Bank. It was possible to withhold undocumented information. He 
would tell Far Banks everything. That did not mean he had given up. He replied 
immediately.
Yes, sir. She served as my housemaid for several weeks after a squad of my men 
had raped her in performance of their duty. One of her personas, I suspect the 
original one, is capable of using microsats to bombard an area with remarkable 
accuracy. It was my intention to take Miss Wyeth at the proper moment and 
extract this knowledge.
For what purpose, Major Deiley?
Primarily for personal gain, sir, with a secondary goal of providing the 
information to NATech Supreme after it had served my purpose. Deiley was taking 
a calculated risk. Far Banks was able to penetrate any lie, and appreciated 
subordinates who did not attempt to hide the fact that they had ulterior 
motives. Still, the flat truth, as he told it, was grounds for execution. For 
Deiley, the risk paid off.
Good. You are a refreshing individual, Major, and I applaud your wisdom. I have 
need of the woman as well, but for different reasons that are not your concern. 
You will abandon your plan and accelerate the timetable of Wyeths dissolution. 
I want her mind ready for harvesting within two weeks, Major.
Yes, sir. Two weeks will be difficult, sir. I can capture her and subject her 
to physical and mental torment. That will greatly accelerate the process as long 
as shes either Miss Chant or Miss Wyeth. The pleasure ripe is immune to such 
tactics. We will require four weeks to induce dissolution, sir. We might 
possibly do it in three.
Very well, Major. You have four weeks. Begin immediately. The terminal blanked 
out and the study walls faded away, leaving Major Deiley in his living room.
He went to the kitchen and retrieved his tea. Stirring in the lemon wedge, he 
contemplated his next action. Capturing the girl would be fairly easy, and 
within his own schedule, if somewhat early. He would initiate that action 
immediately. Indeed, if he followed orders, the entire operation was 
straightforward. There was nothing to think about, the orders were so clear cut.
All he needed to do was decide if he were going to follow those orders.
* * * *
Child! Wait up! Dorothy called out softly. Youre too bouncy for me!
I turned around and giggled. I was on top of a pile of bricks and stones. It was 
almost morning, so I could see Dorothy still at the bottom, so I sat down and 
waited for her. She reached the top, a smile on her face, which made me happy. I 
looked up at the sky that was still dark in most places, but was turning a 
pretty pink in one corner.
Isnt this a nice day, Dorothy? Thank you for taking me home. Will you stay 
with me all day? She sat down next to me.
Well, I dont know about all day. Ill want to do a little cleaning and 
baking.
The oven doesnt work.
Well, I might be able to coax a little bit out of it. She clapped her hands to 
her shoulders and rubbed them, like she liked herself. It looked like fun, so I 
did it, too. She laughed.
My! But its a chilly one this morning!
I know! Look, Dorothy, I can see my breath! I breathed out and some smoke came 
out of my mouth. It was fun, so I did it again.
Dorothy tried it, too, and we laughed. Then Dorothy stood up and helped me to my 
feet.
Thats very good, child. Now lets get to your room. I can make us some hot 
chocolate and we can spend the morning napping. She yawned and stretched, 
looking very pretty. Then this afternoon, well clean up the place and do the 
wash. I rather think that Miss DeChant didnt have time yesterday.
Miss Deshard started to make some bread, but went away after that and left it 
in a big mess on the table. I showed her my hands. And she got some on my 
hands, too, but I cleaned them off!
Good girl. Its nice to stay clean when you can. It shows that you like 
yourself.
It does?
Yes. But lets talk about that after we get to your room, all right?
Okay. Ill go first, Dorothy! Then you come after me. I ran down the pile of 
rocks, falling only once. My hands got bloody from a sharp piece and it felt 
nice. But it wasnt a big cut, and anyway nobody who owned me did it, so I just 
licked it off then ran to the bottom.
I looked up to see if Dorothy was behind me, but then the eyes inside my chest 
saw something and I looked up the street. It was still all black and they were 
inside a building, so I couldnt see them with my eyes in my head. But I could 
still see them. I heard Dorothy stop next to me.
What is it, child? Her voice was quiet-sad. She was looking at my hand.
Over there, Dorothy. I pointed at the building where they were. Theres 
people in there and they want to hurt us.
Just as I pointed, they came out of the building. They were men and there were 
five of them and they were carrying things that they wanted to hit us with. I 
knew they were good at hitting from the way they held them. I felt Dorothy yank 
me towards the alley.
Hurry, child! Weve got to get out of here! Run! Dorothy pulled out her gun, 
and I knew that this kind of hurting wasnt for fun. It was fun for me, but not 
for Dorothy, so that meant it wouldnt be fun for me. So we both ran.
Dorothy was very fast, but stayed behind me. Her face was a little like Miss 
Deshards face in the room, only her hair didnt have as much gray and her skin 
was a little softer. But not as soft as mine. I kept running, feeling afraid 
that these people wanted to take me away from Dorothy and Alan and Abigail. And 
that wasnt right.
They were running fast, too, and getting closer.
Call it off, boys! Dorothy yelled at them in her loud, mean voice. Im a 
Resistance dog and this Cue is under my protection. This is your only warning!
But they kept running after us, so Dorothy shot her gun at them. It didnt make 
any sound but it did make a squeaky noise, but one of them fell down with all 
kinds of blood coming out of a hole in his neck. Dorothy didnt fire again, and 
the others kept coming after us.
And then Dorothy fell down. She tripped over some stuff in the alley and her gun 
fell away. I stopped and ran back and helped her up and then we ran away again. 
Now the bad men were very close. But we were almost at my home. It was just up 
in front of us, around the corner.
We went around the corner and ran to the door. Then I had an idea.
Dorothy! Go run into the field! The man is in that building and hes a nice 
man!
What man? She asked, but then she did what I said, going in front. I looked at 
the men who were really close.
You stay away! Youre not my owners!
One of them, who was big and smelled like he didnt like himself smiled at me. 
Hey, princess, youre here and youre a shard. That makes you ours.
Dont call me Princess! I screamed, sad that they said that. Only Alan and the 
lady who died could call me that. Dorothy could, too. Dorothy! I ran after 
Dorothy. One of the men reached out and touched me, scratching my shoulder, but 
I got away.
Dorothy had fallen down again. She was very tired and anyway there were lots of 
bumps and holes in the field. She was holding a leg.
Dorothy! Get up! The nice man in the building will help us!
Im not going anywhere, child. My leg is hurt. Its up to you Abigail.
I was standing in a field. It was early morning. Dorothy lay at my feet and I 
heard racing footsteps approaching behind me. I spun around. There were four of 
them.
* * * *
It was as the corporal expected. The girl had been too careless and now she had 
attracted a pack of ripers. Fortunately, shed had the good--and uncanny--sense 
to run toward him. He knew that with the other woman there, his presence was 
revealed. No matter. He toggled the rifle to full power and nestled the 
crosshairs on the head of the riper nearest the two women. He paused for a 
flicker of time, then squeezed the trigger. The range was just under two hundred 
meters, so this was childs play.
His target jolted back as the megawatt plasma beam penetrated his face. His head 
disappeared and a red mist took its place. The rifle pinged a small tone behind 
his ear half a second later, indicating it was recharged. Half a second only, 
but the corporal had already lined up on his second target and was squeezing the 
trigger There was a tickling sensation over his arms and face as the already 
ionized air around him fed back the surplus, and again a ripers head 
disappeared in a cloud of steam and blood.
The momentum of the ripers had carried them close to the women, and although two 
were dead, the remaining two were too close to risk a shot. The women were on 
their own. That was not a bad thing, though, judging by the sudden change in the 
demeanor of the girl. If she had sharded back to the original persona, this 
would be a brief fight. He continued to peer through his sight, both to get a 
shot off if possible and to learn more about the girls fighting techniques.
* * * *
I fell into an aggressive defense posture as the first one charged down on us. I 
moved two steps forward, preparing to kick, but the hair on the back of my neck 
stood on end and the mans head vaporized. Someone had a plasma rifle and was 
shooting it at full power and with great accuracy.
The second one was right behind him, and he too died, a mist of blood spattering 
over me. I sidestepped to allow the headless body to collapse past me, and 
prepared to attack the third one.
There would be no more shots from my benefactor because the remaining two were 
far too close. The one reaching for me now had a look of terror on his face. 
Hed been caught in the open and had found out we had a friend. His only way off 
that field was to use me as a shield. Because of that, he couldnt kill me. I 
had no such restriction toward him. Nor would I hesitate. From his sloppy dress, 
it was clear he was a riper.
I needed to kill him quickly to deal with the fourth man, so I shot my right 
hand forward, fingers curled tightly to expose my knuckles, and drove them into 
his throat. The tendons and muscles in his neck snapped and tore. He made to 
scream, but his throat collapsed in on itself, choking him. He had been coming 
to a stop, but his injury made him stagger past me. I stepped quickly behind him 
and spun hard, driving the heel of my right shoe into his temple, crushing it 
and killing him. That left one more.
And he was a big one. He stood a good two meters tall and looked big enough to 
show up on radar. There would be no neck or head shots with this one. At least, 
not until I whittled him down some. I went to a close attack posture, preparing 
to disable him with a kick to the stomach. Then he pulled out a knife.
The knife changed everything. This was no longer a fair fight. If Dorothy and I 
were going to live, I needed to change the odds. I knew just how to do it.
The beast rose up in me and I felt all emotion drain away. He had a knife and he 
was charging me. The blade slashed across, cutting high at my chest. I dropped 
to one knee and knocked his arm up over my head. His bull charge threatened to 
knock me over, but he was quite large, so I slipped between his legs, driving 
the heel of my hand up hard into his crotch as he passed over. He grunted. I 
then kicked at the back of his right knee with my left foot. It buckled and 
tore, but he retained his balance and turned. I spun around and fell into a 
crouch. He came at me slowly this time, the knife in front of him, edge up to 
more easily penetrate under my rib cage.
I looked him hard in the eyes, gauging his skill and nerve. Even in the vague 
light of early dawn, I could see he had little of the first and an abundance of 
the latter. That combination meant I needed to induce the attack. I shot a hand 
forward and grasped his knife wrist. The blade dragged along my forearm, drawing 
blood, but not doing any real damage.
Expecting me to jerk him forward, he yanked his hand back. But instead of 
resisting, I stepped up with him and threw his arm up He was now off balance, 
falling backward. I stepped in even closer, then twisted sideways when I sensed 
his knife arcing down. I grabbed his plunging knife arm a second time and guided 
the blade into his belly. He stepped back to regain his balance, but was forced 
to put his weight on his torn knee. He screamed and dropped to his knees, 
fighting the pain in his leg and the pain in his belly. A second later, he was 
fighting the pain in his right eye as I jabbed a thumb into it. Instinctively, 
he released the knife and clasped his injured eye. I yanked the knife free, then 
buried it straight down into his chest.
His left fist thudded against my body, shaking me to the core of my being and 
slamming me to the ground. The price I had to pay for close combat. There was a 
fire in my lungs as I scrambled to my feet. Fortunately, the fight was over. He 
coughed once, then fell face down into the dirt and dried grass of the field. He 
died and the beast went back to sleep.
I turned toward the abandoned warehouse on the far edge of the field. In the 
growing light, I could make out an opening about ten meters above the ground. 
That would be the most likely spot for a sniper. But whose sniper?
Time to worry about that later. Right now, I needed to get Dorothy and me off 
this field and into my room before we were spotted again.
Dorothy was still down, but struggling to her feet. She was rubbing her leg, but 
it looked as though it would be all right. She looked at me, a pained smile on 
her face.
Nice entrance, child. Sorry to snap you out like that. Dangerous. Still, it 
seemed better than the alternative.
I laughed, then coughed, feeling like Id been stabbed in the chest. It was 
painfully surprising how breathing chilly air seemed to fan the flames in my 
lungs.
Cmon. Lets get to my room. I need to lie down. I started to sag to my knees, 
but Dorothy helped me up. She slung my arm over her shoulder and I yelped. She 
pressed a couple of experienced fingers over my chest and ribs. Wanting to 
salvage some shred of pride, I winced but didnt yell again. She nodded glumly.
You need more than that, dear. Youre going to need some treatment. Youve got 
at least two cracked ribs. Youre lucky in one way. Cheryl will be stopping by 
the base this evening. Cheryl Weaver was our itinerant doctor. We staggered the 
short distance to the entrance to my room.
Once we were inside my room, Dorothy lowered me to the mattress. The sheets were 
off--Miss DeChant planning to do the cleaning no doubt--but I didnt care. I was 
really hurting and was for some reason very thirsty. I hoped I wasnt bleeding 
internally.
Dorothy filled a cup of water for me, stopping up the pipe that the girl had 
left running. She was always forgetting. This time I more than forgave her. It 
was a waste of water, but it was very cool.
I lay back and let Dorothy tend to me. Not wanting to ruin my other shirt, she 
eased off my top and removed the wrapping I used for a bra. She then ripped it 
into three narrower strips and used them as bindings to constrict movement of my 
ribs. She helped me back into my shirt, then gave me a painkiller that I had 
squirreled away, anticipating something like this. I felt better, but knew it 
was only temporary. She sat back, admiring her handiwork. Dorothy was a woman of 
many talents.
All right. Lets try to wait until nightfall, then well get back to base. She 
made the bed underneath me, rolling me gently as needed, then got about cleaning 
the room. I watched her for a few minutes, but drifted off to sleep.
* * * *
Abigail!
An urgent voice pulled me up from my hot sleep. It was so hot I found it 
difficult to breathe. And every breath was laced with fire. I opened groggy 
eyes, not really seeing anything.
Abigail! Child! Wake up! It was Dorothy. What was she doing oh, yeah. We 
were waiting until dark before returning to base to heal my ribs.
Wha--? I said intelligently. I must have really been out of it. Normally, Im 
up and a going concern within seconds of waking. Is it is it dark?
No. She spoke in a low but urgent tone. Its just after two in the afternoon. 
But were going to have to leave. I just heard a transport move by the outside 
wall.
That woke me up. Id never heard one go by. The field was on the outskirts of 
the town, and any shard wandering out there was open game. As such, NATech 
didnt worry too much about it. Their presence here meant only one thing: Theyd 
come to get me. Why, I had no idea, the same as I had no idea why Id have a 
guardian angel with a high-powered plasma rifle watching over my entrance.
What value would I have that they could discern? It seemed impossible that they 
knew about my upcoming attack on the far bank of the Quantum. And the girl would 
never rate this kind of attention. Nor, for that matter, would Miss DeChant.
Deiley
Major Deiley would put a sniper there, I was certain of it. He saw something in 
Miss DeChant that piqued his interest. Shed never said anything about him in 
her notes, but Id always had a feeling that shed felt something for him. Did 
he feel the same back? It seemed unlikely.
But that didnt change the fact that NATech was here to take me away. Nor did it 
change the fact that I didnt want to be taken away. Maybe Deiley was watching 
out for me. But maybe these guys were off duty and had heard about the scuffle. 
Or the sniper had reported in. No matter. It was time to go.
Dorothy, get my gun. I rolled to my side and sat up. It hurt. It hurt a lot. 
But I managed.
Its right here. I pulled it out before waking you. I kept the gun hidden to 
protect the girl. The last thing I needed to do was arm a pleasure ripe, though 
Id told Miss DeChant where it was.
I took it from Dorothy, turned on the charger and switched to sonic inducer. Id 
never had the opportunity to use it since Dusty had modified it all those months 
ago. I hoped it worked.
Dorothy helped me to my feet and we left. I would never be coming back to this 
place, but I didnt look behind me. Dorothy had snatched my Bible, my other 
shirt and the notes from her and Miss DeChant, and that was all I wanted. They 
could keep the rest. Of course, other than my bed and makeshift cross, there was 
nothing else.
At my direction, we cut around the back of the room and began picking our way 
through the heavy machinery and maze of scattered parts and abandoned inventory 
toward my bolthole. Id said there was only one entrance and I was accurate. 
Where we were going was an exit, designed to be used only once.
Behind me I heard the pounding of feet racing to my room. But by now we were 
over one hundred meters away, and we would not be found. The bolthole dropped 
down to the basement and led into an adjacent building. We walked along the 
dirty, twisting path and worked our way around piles of trash and fallen 
masonry, making very little noise. Though Dorothy still helped me on occasion, I 
was breathing fairly easily and could walk on my own. When we finally emerged on 
the street, we were two blocks down and three blocks over.
* * * *
Sorry, sir, but the target has evaded us.
Shes not a target, Sergeant. Shes a woman. Deiley felt a flash of 
irritation. Not at the mans callousness, but at himself for correcting so 
trivial a detail.
Yes, sir. We still havent discovered her escape route, but it probably doesnt 
matter. Its been thirty minutes since we entered her room.
Thirty minutes. Which almost certainly means shes at their base by now. Very 
well, Sergeant. Continue the search for the women, just in case theyve been 
hindered. Remind your men of the consequences if either are hurt or molested.
Unlikely theyll need reminding, sir. You were quite explicit to me and I made 
sure I was the same to my men.
Good. Carry on. Oh, by the way, Sergeant?
Yes, sir?
How did they know about your arrival?
The sergeant had an exasperated look on his face. The first team brought their 
hov in along the outer wall. Standard tactic, but theyd been told this wasnt a 
standard retrieval. The womans room is against that wall. She would have heard 
the approach.
And you dealt with it by
By executing the squad leader, sir. The sergeant sounded slightly surprised 
that such a routine subject was even brought up. Deiley nodded and switched off.
* * * *
That should do it, Abby. Doctor Weaver put down her sounder and felt my ribs. 
Theyll be a little tender for a few days. And there will be some bruising. But 
youll make it so long as you can avoid knife fights for a week or so. She 
smiled tiredly, the smile of an overworked but greatly valued physician.
Thanks, Doctor. Thats good advice. Now if only the people with the knives will 
follow it. I took a deep breath and felt only a twinge. Much better.
I hopped down off the table and went to find Alan, closing my shirt. Everywhere, 
people were moving busily around, packing up equipment and breaking down the 
base. That was my fault. I darted in and out of the nearly chaotic scene, 
knowing just where Id find Alan.
He was in our access room, working on the power feed. All Resistance bases used 
their own power source to prevent dependence on a civilian power grid. Even our 
operation had an ionic mass converter, though much smaller and somewhat older 
than most regiments. Since neither it nor this base would be ours much longer, 
we were going to push the generator to the red line. That meant disengaging the 
safety cutoffs and optimizing power flow for the high volume that the variable 
mass simulator and our next access were going to demand. Thats what Alan was 
doing now. That and trying not to get killed if an unleashed plasma tendril 
burned through the conduits and into the crawlway where he worked. He looked 
down from his perch and flipped up the feedback shield. He was shirtless and 
sweaty. Id been up there before, and if I were up there now, Id be shirtless 
and sweaty. Well, sweaty at any rate. He noticed my easy movement and nodded 
approvingly.
Much better, he said, voicing the same judgment Id made. Nice timing, too. I 
need you to fine-tune the calibration of our variable mass simulator. The last 
person just walked off the job. He winked at me slyly.
Have her found and ridiculed, then. I laughed and picked up my tool kit.
We worked quietly for an hour, finishing up our battleground. In just a few 
hours, wed be crossing the Quantum, and nothing would be left to chance. Of 
course, I could always shard, but I somehow doubted that would happen. With the 
exception of Posens induced episode, I never sharded once I was in the 
puterverse.
As I said, we worked quietly. But it was far from quiet. The base was being 
transferred and there was an urgency that was very efficient but also very loud. 
Equipment, supplies, food, everything was being packed and loaded onto the three 
phase hovs we had and moved to a predetermined location. With a little luck, 
NATech wouldnt move against us for several more hours, and even then it would 
require another hour or so to burn through the shielding Id rigged. When we 
settled here a few months ago, I set up a series of molecule-thick shields set 
at alternating harmonic frequencies that could be activated in the event of an 
attack. Although each shield could only withstand a moderate attack--say one 
punch from a heavy plasma gun--the shields were layered like an onionskin and 
there were hundreds of them. Of course, the shield served a very strict 
defensive model. We couldnt shoot out. And it cut us off from the atmosphere, 
so we had limited air. But it did give us time to evacuate. And as long as I 
could initiate my access before they began the attack, I felt there was enough 
time to finish my fight before breakthrough.
I finished calibration just as Alan completed the power flow modifications. He 
dropped down from the access crawlway and wiped off his bare, sweaty chest with 
his shirt. He back was to me, so I sneaked a long look. It seemed impossible 
that I had once looked at women like this and thought the thoughts I now had 
toward Alan. The look of his hard, muscled back, the heady man scent, the 
confidence that seemed to emanate from him, they all made my heart trip. We 
would never be more than friends, and both of us knew that. But that didnt mean 
that I couldnt have a friend with such a wonderful smile and gorgeous butt.
I shook my head to throw off such thoughts and started putting away my tools. 
The time for idle fantasizing was forever denied me now. All that lay ahead for 
me was one last moment to try and make a difference. After that--if I avoided 
capture and execution by NATech--a few more weeks of slowly breaking down before 
I was carried into the Room to wait, my few remaining friends standing by to 
ease my final pains.
* * * *
Two hours later, my friends were standing by me. Not to ease my pain but to help 
me begin my final mission. Alan on my left, Mike on my right, and Kiki in front 
of me, working her unique brand of magic. We were facing the Quantum back door, 
and Kiki was working through the second to last lock. We had to shield our eyes 
somewhat from Kikis bright light. To avoid detection, we had temporarily 
eschewed UTC and were accessing at level thirty-two. Kiki wasnt coming with us, 
and was at total access. Id never realized the difference. Did my actions come 
off this bright--almost painful--to others? Id have to allow for that in my 
future accesses. Right. Like I had a future.
At my direction, she was being careful not to disrupt the locks but to work 
through them. I had told them I didnt want the aura that resulted from such 
large discharges to attract worms or other unwanted attention. I was being only 
partially truthful. No, I was lying. I didnt really care about what was on this 
side of the Quantum.
The last lock turned from dark black to a smoky crystal and fell off, a bright, 
apple-scented key in its keyhole. Kiki lowered her arms.
Okay, Abby! Thats the last one I can do without force. The last one is the 
original one, and theres no way to pick a hard-coded lock that old. She 
stepped up to it and peered at it closely, then spoke as if it were an honorable 
and respected enemy.
It is formidable looking, isnt it?
I stood up next to her and eyed it. It was formidable looking.
Not to worry, Kiki. All you need is the right key. I held out my hand, fingers 
splayed. A terminal with keyboard rose from the ground. I plugged the data feed 
into the lock and typed out a single word. The lock imploded and turned to dust, 
a small cloud floating slowly down.
Gotcha? Kiki asked, referring to the password.
Believe me, Kiki, theres nothing more embarrassing than forgetting your 
backdoor password. Something this well hidden would have an easy password, one 
that youd never have to write down.
How did you know it, Abby? Alan asked.
Chris worked for me, remember? At his startled look, I realized he hadnt 
known. Sorry, Alan. I thought you knew. Anyway, he wouldnt have told me his 
passwords outright. Not ones like this. But credit me with a little 
intelligence. I wasnt his boss by accident. I considered it a personal 
challenge to know all my employees backdoors and passwords. I shook my head at 
the memory. That seems so long ago, even for me. Well. Onward and upward! 
Rather, downward.
I shoved the door open and it disappeared like the lock, leaving only a quickly 
dissipating cloud of dust. It dropped straight down into pitch-blackness. I 
tried to light it up, but was unable to. Mike whistled.
Not a good sign. Could this be a known access port, Abby?
Known or not, Mike, I responded, This is all weve got. I turned to Kiki. 
See you later, kid. Keep the porch light on. I stepped into the darkness.
As soon as I started falling, I knew we were in trouble. I was falling much too 
fast for the puterverse. I tried to control my fall, but with non-UTC. Which 
meant I failed. I just went loose and relied on my instinct and reflexes to keep 
me safe.
A few seconds later I discovered my faith was well founded. I sensed more than 
felt the ground and braced myself at just the right time. I felt a small jolt in 
my ribs, but otherwise landed fine. I stepped forward into a barely seen opening 
and made room for Alan and Mike. They landed seconds later without mishap.
Okay, Kiki. I called quietly, looking up the shaft. Lets have some light. 
Alan jerked me back, and I grinned sheepishly. Not too wise looking directly 
into a solar burst I couldnt see coming. We all faced the opening that reached 
under the Quantum.
There was a flash behind us. I wouldnt exactly say the tunnel was flooded with 
light. Flooded was too strong. Perhaps moistened. We could see, that was it. It 
looked dank and unused. It smelled dank and unused. We struck out, me leading 
point, Mike and Alan coming behind. Inside me, I felt the beast starting to 
stir.
Fortunately, the tunnel lived up to its billing. It was dank and unused. We went 
maybe one hundred meters when the tunnel ended at another hole. I stepped up to 
it and peered in. It was filled with Quantum data.
Geez! Mike said with exasperation. This thing has been here so long, the 
rivers breached and filled it! Now what?
Gotcha, Mike! I laughed at his mistake. Youve just fallen for an old one! I 
turned to Alan. Whats wrong with this picture, Alan?
He looked at it carefully for a moment, then began chuckling. It does look like 
the tunnels flooded, Abby. But were below river level, so that means our 
tunnel should be flooded as well. He looked at Mike. Gotcha, Mike.
Mike didnt say anything, but I think this little trick helped. Hed always had 
a pretty low opinion of flesh--other than me and a couple of my friends--and 
this served notice that we humans still had a few things we could teach him. 
Still chuckling, I stepped into the data stream.
I fell less than three meters and it was as we suspected: the data was illusory. 
The illusion continued for perhaps ten more meters, then discontinued, revealing 
a danker, darker, and tinier tunnel. I waited for the boys to join me, then we 
moved along. We were on the last leg.
After what seemed forever--I wondered if we were being subjected to the same 
warping Id used on other people--we reached the tunnels end. There was a set 
of rungs reaching up into a stygian darkness thick enough to have substance.
This is it? Alan asked.
This is it. No sense waiting around. I jumped up lightly, grabbed a rung, and 
started climbing. Mike, then Alan, followed close behind. Despite the 
seriousness of the situation, I still had the humorous thought that it was a 
good thing I wasnt in a dress.
We climbed for what seemed like ages. It made no difference to us; though we had 
weight, it had no effect on our strength. One rung or one million, the effort 
was the same. It was a little bothersome that an attempt like this was even 
made. Maybe that was the point of this, to bother us. But we remained fairly 
patient and we reached the top. There was no tunnel here, just a small room 
surrounding the hole wed climbed out of. We remained pressed close to the 
sides. At my back was a large door.
Shall I burn through it, Abby? Mikes eyes lit up the room, and I could see 
the energy starting to shine through the restraining armor he had on. Alan and I 
could access at various levels. Mike couldnt. To him, everything was total 
access at UTC. To cover that signature, he used a type of negative shielding. It 
weakened him, but hid his presence.
No need, Mike. I reached for it, and it opened under my hand. Its unlocked. 
In any event, I doubt it will even be here in a moment. I took a deep breath. 
Ready, gentlemen? They nodded and all of us went to total access. As I 
suspected, the door, walls, and tunnel vanished, and we were on the far side of 
the Quantum.
* * * *
Weve achieved breakthrough, sir. The lieutenant gave a crisp salute to Major 
Deiley, but wasted no more time. The first squad blitzed in, but there was no 
one there. Im sending the next four squads in now.
Very good, Lieutenant. I expect the base will be nearly deserted. It had 
better be; hed given them more than enough time to pull out. This way, the 
Resistance could continue with their work, and he wouldnt lose men 
unnecessarily. But he was probably quick enough to still find Miss Wyeth here.
He and the lieutenant walked together to the base, the lieutenant occasionally 
giving out orders. They reached the main entrance and went in. Other than his 
men, it was deserted.
They gone into a long hallway, used to house the shards, when a soldier came 
running up behind them. He jerked to a stop and saluted.
Weve found two of them, sir! Theyre in the puterverse. Corporal White sent me 
to inform you and to tell you he and two others were going in on their own 
initiative.
That fool! Deiley spat out and began walking quickly to the room. Wasnt he 
warned about entering an access area with Wyeth present? He spoke with a clear 
voice to activate the comnet already placed over the base. Corporal White! This 
is Major Deiley! Do not enter that room! There was no response, so they began 
running. Probably a waste of time.
It was a waste of time. When they arrived two minutes later, they could see 
easily into the room; Corporal White had not closed the door. They could as 
easily see why he hadnt: The remains of all three men lay just inside it. In 
the center of the room were Wyeth and a man, probably Lieutenant Lockwood. 
Between them and Deiley stood a bright orb of light, less than a half meter 
high. It moved about as though alive, guarding the two people. Judging by the 
bloody and shattered corpses, Wyeth had chosen her sentry wisely. Deiley sighed 
and sat down. He hoped the Lieutenant could not--or chose not to--see his hands 
tremble slightly as the sight of Miss DeChant. He was so very close to his goal. 
But what was his goal?
All right. Well wait for them out here. I dont think it will be too long.
* * * *
There was nothing to be seen. From flat, featureless horizon to flat, 
featureless horizon, there was nothing. Appropriately enough, the ground was 
flat black, only slightly less black than the sky, and much duller. Even the 
Quantum, about a half-kilometer behind us, gave no light. Wed come here, ready 
to fight our way through a host of typical goons, bullies, and monsters. All the 
standard stuff. But no, we had the place to ourselves. That scared me. Id hoped 
he thought they would have been necessary to wear us down. That he didnt made 
him very confident or very powerful. Probably both.
What gives, Abby? Mike was looking around, perplexed. Are we at the wrong 
address?
No, were not. I turned out to the open plane and raised my voice. All right, 
Chris. Lets get it over with.
WHO? Mike spun toward me and for the first time I could remember, he was 
genuinely surprised. Surprised and scared. But I didnt respond to his question, 
nor to Alans unasked one. My attention was focused on the ground five meters in 
front of me.
A deep black hole appeared, pulling in energy from the surrounding terrain. When 
it was filled, the energy pool raised up and took on a humanoid form. Colorless 
at first, it began shifting and sharpening, gaining shades and hues. Slivers of 
energy pulled away and became arms. A bulge grew from the top and began growing 
hair and a hideous skeleton face that started covering itself with muscle and 
skin. A small hole appeared in the middle of the torso. It became a slit, then a 
separation as legs formed.
A body fully formed, it quickly finished with the defining features of Chris 
Young.
Hello, John. He cracked his grin at me, the one he always used whenever he 
thought or actually did have something over me.
Hello, Chris. Only its not John anymore. Its Abigail.
He laughed. Really? Lets see. He flipped a hand and I felt an energy field 
surround me. I looked down and saw that instead of my normal glowing form, I was 
standing naked in my human form. I had expected something like this. I smiled at 
him, paying no attention to my nakedness.
You always were something of a leech, Chris. Go ahead. Look all you want.
He got a dirty look on his face. Youre feminine enough on the outside, John. 
But Im sure youre still John Wyeth. He flipped his hand again and I returned 
to my original form. So. Have you and your army come to defeat me?
Uh-huh. And why not? Youre the one responsible for NATech Supreme, arent you, 
Chris? It was you who developed the webbing techniques. It was you who 
manipulated NATech, the original one, into a role of prominence after the Terran 
Martian Wars. It was you who--
Yes, yes, yes. All that, John, and more. He looked at me thoughtfully. Im 
surprised you dont take some of the credit yourself, though. After all, I 
couldnt have done all this without you.
What? I whispered.
Then you dont know? So my old boss does have a chink in his armor. He 
laughed. I created the webbing techniques, sure. But once Id developed the 
overall concept, it became clear that I had something and I needed something I 
had a powerful programming scheme that could ultimately give unimaginable 
control to the being who owned it, which was me.
But I needed a full time presence to monitor it and develop it while I worked 
out a plan of action. Fortunately, I was surrounded by some of the best minds 
that ever existed, so I picked the best one. He smiled, and his smile revealed 
bright white teeth with a forked tongue that made me flinch. I picked you, 
John.
Then it was you who had me killed.
Yes. I manipulated your death and transfer into the computer, another little 
something Id worked out in my spare time: the moving of a mind and soul into 
another host. I planned to do it to myself at the right time. Only I wasnt sure 
it would work. So I needed a guinea pig. You. And in case you died, John, I had 
two others picked out.
But you worked out far beyond my wildest expectations. After Id used you to 
stabilize my webbing schemes, I hid you in the computer banks for six years, 
then reintroduced you as my first netter.
I wasnt saying anything. I didnt know what to say.
I kept you there for about two centuries, then started moving you around as I 
needed. Youve had quite a career, John. Netter, space station, a lowly 
housemaid, the primary core to the PlaNet defense systems. He paused.
But it was the housemaid that ended up being the most profitable for me. Id 
been following the studies and theories of Professor LeClaire, and was excited 
by his studies in Keyed Memory Encapsulation. I arranged for him to be given a 
housemaid, and saw to it that it was your mind that was used to provide life to 
the soulless female. He grinned. I also liked the thought of screwing you bad, 
John. Not physically, of course. Theres no way I wanted to leave the puterverse 
once Id made my home here. But Id always been put off by your ease with women. 
I couldnt stand seeing you work so well with them and not use that to your 
advantage.
You mean you hated my respect for all my people. Thats why you never made it 
to Project Leader, Chris. You tended to think with your head second.
Could be, John. Could be. But at least I dont have any dresses in my wardrobe. 
And I saw to it that you did have dresses in your wardrobe. I paid close 
attention to your life as Miss DeChant, John. It was a pleasant diversion from 
ruling the planet.
But then Professor LeClaire actually developed a workable KME procedure. I 
didnt know what he planned to implant, but I guessed hed choose you to implant 
it in. And so he did.
I shook my head. Sorry, Chris. But youre wrong. Theres been nothing special 
about Miss DeChant that would indicate--
God! Youre stupid! Of course there wouldnt be anything in her, John. This 
thing takes years, centuries, to develop. And after I realized that LeClaire 
planned to betray me, I had both of them killed the night he implanted the 
capsule in your mind. I then put you someplace safe to develop that KME; into 
the planetary defense system.
Unfortunately, the KME didnt develop. I gave up after a century and a half and 
ordered you destroyed. But a traitor shifted your mind into another computer 
bank and reported you terminated. He was caught and executed, but you managed to 
disappear. Its only in the past few months that I put together the rest of the 
story. He smiled. I find it quite humorous that youve never regained your 
manhood, John.
The smile disappeared. I also found it very exciting when I found out that the 
KME did develop over time. I just hadnt given it enough time. Thats how you 
acquired your ability to program in bound trinary code. And now Im going to 
acquire that ability from you, John. I have Major Deiley standing by to harvest 
your mind as soon as Ive shut it down. He raised a hand. Ive never savored a 
moment as much as Ive savored this one. Goodbye John.
A bolt of solid black energy exploded from his hand and struck me full force. My 
shielding had long been up, though, so it splashed harmlessly off me. I laughed.
Not what you expected, eh, Chris? Tell me, did you expect this? I tightened my 
body and a sphere of crystals erupted from my body. They spread out in all 
directions for twenty meters, then homed in on Chris, hammering with blow after 
blow after blow. He stepped back, staggered.
That was the cue for Alan and Mike. Alan came at his right side from the ground, 
Mike at his left from the air. Alan slid negative shielding around him, lowering 
his access level and leaving him open to Mikes blistering attacks. Green plasma 
slipped between the negative shielding cracks and I heard him scream. He fell to 
his knees.
I stepped up, feeling suddenly tired. I just wanted this over with.
Chris, youve manipulated all of Earths society for centuries. Youve 
callously used and discarded thousands, perhaps millions of lives. Youve 
surrendered your own humanity for power. I pity you more than anything else. But 
Ive no way to express that pity that will help anyone, including you. Youre 
right, Chris. Its time to say goodbye. I placed my hands on his forehead to 
fire a razor of UTC into his cyberbrain. Goodbye, Chris.
I fired, but nothing happened. Confused and worried, I tried again. Nothing. He 
looked up at me, smiling.
Whats wrong, John?
Stop calling me John! For some reason, I was suddenly upset by his constant 
use of my old name. My name is Abigail!
Really? Kind of kinky isnt it, calling yourself by a girls name, isnt it, 
John? After all, just look at yourself.
Stunned, I looked at myself. I was a man. My arms were strong, my chest wide, 
and my body complete. I stepped back, knowing I should press the attack, but 
unable to. Mike and Alan were looking at me with startled eyes, aghast.
Stop it! Stop it! My name is Abigail! Im a woman!
If you say so, Abigail. Have it your way.
I felt a wave wash over me and I looked at myself again. I was a woman!
Nooo! I yelled, covering my nakedness. What have you done to me? Stop it, 
Chris! Make me a man again!
But you just insisted youre a woman, Abigail. Make up your mind, girl. He was 
smiling again.
Abby! Mike jumped up into the air and brought both hands together, preparing 
to launch a bolt at Chris. Panic gripped me. If he destroyed Chris, I could 
never be a man again! But wait, wasnt my name Abigail? It couldnt be. That was 
a girls name.
I shouted at Mike to not fire, but my voice was drowned out by a thunderclap of 
sound as Chris opened fire at Mike. The battering ram of energy didnt explode 
when it struck Mike. Rather, it filled him, as though he were sucking it in. 
Chris had hit him with a virus, and caught off guard, Mike was quickly coming 
undone. I started to rush Chris, to hit him, when I felt Alan hold me back. His 
hand on my tiny shoulder made me scream.
Dont touch me! Leave me alone, Alan! I kept myself covered, feeling shame and 
revulsion at being in a womans body. Even worse, a young womans body.
Abby! Calm down! Look! He fended off my weak blows and pulled my foot up. 
Black tendrils, reaching up from the ground, were embedded in them. Even as I 
watched, the skin in my lower leg bulged as they pushed deeper inside me. I 
screamed.
Calm down! Young is messing with your mind, Abby! I think hes doing some kind 
of partial ripe! Youve been Abigail Wyeth for three years now. Remember! He 
shook me by the shoulders. Remember! You were even engaged to a man.
NO! That cant be true! I am a man! Im just in the wrong body!
No, youre not! This is who you are! Remember? Please! Snap out of it, Abby! 
You told me how much you loved him. His name was Aaron Marks.
Aaron
Thats more than enough from you, Lockwood. Chris had been occupied with Mike, 
but now turned his attention to us. He didnt even move and suddenly Alan was 
sinking into the ground. His face became contorted with pain. Chris laughed.
So, whats it to be, Lockwood? You can save yourself by ending access. Of 
course, that means abandoning John. Not that you can help out anyway. All three 
of you were fools! Coming to my home, thinking to beat me, armed only with some 
bound trinary code. Its painful enough, Ill grant you, and potentially more 
potent than pseudo trinary code. But Ive had centuries to refine my pseudo 
trinary, and its far more advanced than your current skills.
He looked back at me. And what about you, John? Shall I turn you back into a 
man? Come. Its time to abandon this lost cause. Your construct is all but 
destroyed. Every moment you wait brings your human friend closer to death. Give 
me the memory capsule and Ill let both your friends go.
I felt the tendrils twist and lurch deeper in my body. Into my foreign, female 
body. They were now up to my stomach. Mike lay motionless on the ground, encased 
in a smoky black rock. Alan would have passed out from the agony if Chris hadnt 
been keeping him awake. All I needed to do to end this suffering was to let 
Chris have my mind. But I couldnt. No more than I could make a deal with the 
devil.
You know what, Chris? Youd think that six hundred years would have mellowed a 
person out. But youre still an asshole.
His face tightened and he started to say something, when suddenly everything 
became fuzzy and my skin felt
COOL RESET POUR PRESS COOL RESET POUR PRESS COOL RESET POUR PRESS COOL RESET 
POUR PRESS COOL RESET POUR PRESS COOL RESET POUR PRESS COOL RESET POUR PRESS 
COOL RESET POUR PRESS COOL RESET POUR PRESS COOL RESET POUR PRESS COOL RESET 
POUR PRESS COOL RESET POUR PRESS COOL RESET
End of Book Three